When you find it hard to look forward in hope
“I would have despaired unless I had believed that I would see the goodness of the Lord In the land of the living.” – Psalm 27:13, NASB 1995
When problems rise up against me, when troubles surround me, and when I see injustice everywhere, that’s when I’m tempted to be in despair and to lose faith. I ask God so many questions.
“Where are you when the poor have nothing to eat?”
“Where are you when the sick are suffering in pain?”
“Where are you when the innocent are being unjustly accused?”
It’s not so easy to trust God then as when the days are good and the blessings are plenty. During such times when I need God so badly and He remains silent, I feel a deep chasm between us that I could never cross and He is as distant as a dream I could never reach.
I have read and I have written so many articles about the existence of evil and why such evil had been allowed by a good God. But everything seems useless when one personally experiences unbearable suffering.
To make matters worse, when one’s faith starts to falter, other believers may add to one’s burden by their well-intentioned remarks.
“Don’t expect any reward in this life. Look forward to heaven.”
“Suffering is the only way to prove you’re a good Christian.”
While true happiness and justice can only be found when Jesus comes and establishes a new heaven and a new earth, should I remain numb to the darkness that I see in the world?
Must a Christian expect nothing but suffering and pain in this life?
When I reflect upon this thought, the more that my heart starts to faint. It’s as though I could look forward to nothing good in this life anymore. Not justice. Not healing. Not deliverance from my troubles.
If this is the way we must look at the world, how should we treat the poor and the suffering around us? Should we just tell them to stop complaining and just look forward to heaven where everything will be fine in the end?
Why should we help alleviate the pain of our neighbors when we can’t even expect the same kind of help from God?
Is everything about the salvation of the soul and nothing about the healing of the physical body?
But when I read the Bible, I see Jesus curing the sick and multiplying bread to feed the hungry. I see Him giving sight to the blind. I see Him bringing a dead man’s body back to life. He did not tell everyone to just wait for paradise where they can have the redemption of their souls.
Perhaps this is why this version of David’s Psalm brings me so much comfort:
“I would have despaired unless I had believed that I would see the goodness of the Lord In the land of the living.” – Psalm 27:13, NASB 1995
It allows me to hope that I can still see God’s goodness while I am still alive. It keeps me from despairing that I may never see justice or healing or compassion in the land of the living.
Of course the final triumph of goodness is still to come. And not every pain or problem will be solved in this life. But allow me to hope that I can still see a little bit of light even the midst of this dark world. Allow me to believe that I can still see God’s goodness in the land of the living where I still am today.
Check Jocelyn's books:
"Of Waves and Butterflies: Poems on Grief", "Mend My Broken Heart", "Questions to God", "To Love an Invisible God", "Defending My Catholic Faith", and more - click here.
(You may freely quote excerpts from this website as long as due credit is given to author Jocelyn Soriano and the website itakeoffthemask.com)