Why Is It So Hard To Be Perfect?

Why Is It So Hard To Be Perfect?

My child, you are broken. Unless you know that you are broken yourself, it will be severely laborious to love the broken people around you. You will be harsh and exacting towards them. But because you want others to like you, you will always attempt to hide your weaknesses from others. Let me strip away your masks, so that you may know who you really are. And when this truth sets you free, then shall you be free to genuinely love. Before this occurs, your love will be offered by the flask, not by the torrents of a river. –BoSanchez, Embraced

How does it feel like trying to be perfect all the time?

How does it feel like trying to always be the one person who understands, who cares about others, who gives and gives and yet receives nothing in return?

I’ll tell you how it feels like.  It’s tiring!  There are times when you feel as though you can’t even breathe anymore.  You can’t relax because you know you’re not allowed to make any mistake.  You feel afraid because once you do make one, you don’t know if you can still be forgiven and understood.

And it just feels so unfair.  Why are so many people being forgiven and loved after committing so many mistakes in their lives?  Why can’t I be loved like that?  Why can’t people be patient with me, too?

Trying to be perfect is like trying to do the impossible, and since we can’t accomplish it, we’re bound to be frustrated in the end.  We feel the rejection of other people because we first rejected ourselves.  After a while, we also begin rejecting other people because they can’t live up to the strict standards we have set for everyone.

Will God Reject Me Too?

God wants us to be perfect someday, but He knows the limits of our humanity at the moment, and that is why He has provided us MERCY.

If we could all attain perfection on our own, Jesus need not have been crucified for us.  But He knew we needed GRACE, and He decided to MEET us, not at our point of perfection, but at our point of pain.

There are times when the words I LOVE YOU seem to pale in comparison with the words I FORGIVE YOU.  Why?  Because there are times when the words I LOVE YOU could only stand for as long as you’re good enough, but the words I FORGIVE YOU have already dealt with your darkest sins and still finds the strength to look you in the eye and accept you as you are.

Love and Perfection

Love does not say,
“I am now PERFECT,
you can now LOVE me,”
for such makes love conditional
upon one’s perfection,
and makes the beloved proud and arrogant
instead of being full of gratitude.
Such a love evokes fear
for it is a love that can easily be lost
upon the slightest mistake
and upon the smallest sign
that the beloved is not worthy of one’s love.
Let those who yearn to know
what true love really is behold –
“I am wretched
but You have lifted me up and LOVED me.

The Parable of the Pharisee and the Tax Collector

Jesus also told this parable to people who were sure of their own goodness and despised everybody else.

Once there were two men who went up to the Temple to pray: one was a Pharisee, the other a tax collector. The Pharisee stood apart by himself and prayed, I thank you, God, that I am not greedy, dishonest, or an adulterer, like everybody else. I thank you that I am not like that tax collector over there. I fast two days a week, and I give you one tenth of all my income.

But the tax collector stood at a distance and would not even raise his face to heaven, but beat on his breast and said,  God, have pity on me, a sinner!  I tell you, said Jesus, the tax collector, and not the Pharisee, was in the right with God when he went home. For those who make themselves great will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be made great.
-Luke 18:9-14

You may also want to read: Where I Fit In

Check Jocelyn's books:

"Of Waves and Butterflies: Poems on Grief", "Mend My Broken Heart", "Questions to God", "To Love an Invisible God", "Defending My Catholic Faith", and more - click here.

(You may freely quote excerpts from this website as long as due credit is given to author Jocelyn Soriano and the website itakeoffthemask.com)