Category: journal

Why I Still Want to Be a Writer

Post author By Jocelyn Soriano
Post date April 14, 2021
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“Every secret of a writer’s soul, every experience of his life, every quality of his mind, is written large in his works.” — Virginia Woolf

If I were to be asked again what it is I’d like to do, I’d answer that I still want to write. O, there are so many things I’d like to share, so many things I’d like to write about.

People usually say I’m the quiet type of person, and perhaps it’s because they don’t see me talking so much. In reality, I want to say so many things, things I couldn’t all put into words.

I can’t say them all. That’s why I write them.

I write about feelings and thoughts I wanted to process. I write about hurts that have been healed and dreams that came true. I write about the people and things I care about. I write about my most valuable beliefs.

When I write, I want to share something important with others. I want to let them feel the happiness I felt and the peace that I have found. I want my readers to know that they are not alone, and that no matter what they are going through, there is always hope for them. There is hope because there is God. A God who loves them like no other.

Time is so short to write everything I want to say. May God help me write what I must. And though I may not succeed in sharing much, may those who read my works know at least this much: that there is a meaning to their lives, that there is something good they can look forward to, and no matter how others may make them feel, their lives matter because they are so dearly dearly loved.

“If you want to change the world, pick up your pen and write.” — Martin Luther

journal

The Kind of Silence I Could Almost Hear

Post author By Jocelyn Soriano
Post date April 12, 2021
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I once went to a place in Guimaras, a beautiful island in the Philippines. I’ve been to many places, but in that place, there was a different kind of silence…a silence you could almost hear. Perhaps it’s because of the lack of electricity in the area. Perhaps it’s the absence of internet connections. But in that place, silence is more than the absence of sound. It was a kind of silence you can feel, a silence whose presence touches you and changes you. It as that kind that I could never forget.

Here is an actual excerpt from my diary:

At Himala, Barangay Sibunag, we witnessed a spectacular sunset. (I was glad we captured it on film). I was glad I didn’t miss the silhouette of the tree set apart from the rest, somewhat bowing to the left with branches surrendering to the glaring orange sky.

Indeed, the peace of the place, especially upon arriving at Barangay Sebaste was striking. No loud stereos, no television sets?—?just the soft rusting of leaves and the sweet chirping of birds now and then.

They say that silence is not the same as peace, and I agree, but sometimes, we need a certain silence to understand again what peace was like. Silence helps us listen deeper. It opens not only our ears, but our hearts.

“We sit silently and watch the world around us. This has taken a lifetime to learn. It seems only the old are able to sit next to one another and not say anything and still feel content. The young, brash and impatient, must always break the silence. It is a waste, for silence is pure. Silence is holy. It draws people together because only those who are comfortable with each other can sit without speaking. This is the great paradox.”? Nicholas Sparks, The Notebook

journal

Those Things I’ve Been Missing Ever Since the Pandemic

Post author By Jocelyn Soriano
Post date March 20, 2021
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It’s been a year since the pandemic forced everyone out of normalcy. Many people have been hit hard, some losing their source of income, and some losing the very ones they love. When I think about what I have left compared to others around me, I can’t help but feel I’ve been spared of difficulties I couldn’t even begin to imagine.

It doesn’t mean, however, that my heart doesn’t ache for all the things I’ve lost. I know that only God’s grace has kept me from being crippled by anxiety. It is only God’s grace that has allowed me to carry on.

My life is simple. I’m not rich enough to enjoy the luxuries of always going out of the country. I don’t socialize much either, and so I won’t be missing parties or concerts or other events that other people do. Yet in my own life, there are some things I miss.

I miss the freedom to go out of the house whenever I want to. Not that I’d get very far. But that I know I could at least visit my favorite bookstore or simply go to Church and light a candle there while I pray. I may even plan on visiting nearby friends I feel like it.

I miss being able to breathe without the fear of being sick. That simple pleasure of enjoying the cool morning air and breathing without a mask or a facial shield.

I miss going to the mall with my family. I miss going to mass with them and then eating out and strolling about, simply exploring that small space where one can see new things and meet new people. I miss shopping for good that I can touch and smell.

I miss going to the movies. There’s nothing like buying some popcorn and then going in your favorite theater to watch the latest film.

I miss going to my favorite café. That time when I need not hurry, when I can simply watch the people passing by as I enjoy my favorite coffee and desert.

I miss street foods. Being able to eat lugaw (a local congee), fish balls, barbeque and sorbetes (a local version of ice cream).

I miss being able to plan for things that I could do next, whether it be learning a new sport or hobby or getting to a new place. Not that I’m an extrovert. But there’s something within every person that longs to have that freedom to plan, to explore and to look forward to many things in life.

I miss the possibility of being able to walk in the rain again without fear of getting sick or of being the carrier of a virus that could risk the lives of my loved ones.

I don’t know how long the effects of this pandemic would be. But I don’t want to lose hope that things can still return to normal.

I know many people would discourage me, many who believe that we shouldn’t yearn for things to be the way they were again. But I think I need this hope at least to keep me hanging on, to protect my sanity, and to guard my humanity. I need to believe that things can still be better and one day, we can be free again.

journal Spirituality

A List of Some of the Most Valuable Lessons I’ve Learned in Life

Post author By Jocelyn Soriano
Post date February 10, 2021
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Only God can make you truly happy.
Even the best of people will fail you. Don’t expect people to be like God.
Forgive yourself and get up quickly after each fall. Let not your mistake bring you to despair, but towards the path of humility.
Things will not always happen as planned, learn to be resilient. Do your best and let God’s beautiful plan for you unfold in His time.
Worry is useless. We can never know what will happen next. Even if your worry comes true, remember that your worry never helped you at all. It just took away your joy for the present and robbed you of the time you could have spent better. You spend time better when you do things out of love rather than out of fear.
It is useless trying to please people. Most people won’t be pleased anyway, and no one who has only lived for the approval of others has ever been pleased with oneself. Please God and you will discover also what will satisfy your soul.
Evil may seem to triumph for a while, but it is Light that will always triumph in the end.
Truth doesn’t have to be complicated. You will understand how simple truth is once you seek it with all your heart.
Evil may seem to have a good time. It gains wealth, fame and power. It laughs and pretends to have joy. But remember that there can be no true peace for the wicked.
You need two things to make the right decision?—?your conscience and your commonsense. You lose more and more of both once you lose your faith in God.
Pride is often the culprit that robs us of our happiness.
We can often blame God for many things, especially for the sufferings we experience in this life. In the end, however, God is our only hope, and the only answer to the deepest desires of our hearts.

journal

What Writing Means To Me

I’ve always considered writing to be a gift. It’s a gift that allows me to connect to the world and to express myself. Being an introvert, I consider these things to be very important to me.

Later, I have also realized that although writing is part of my mission in life, I should not treat it as an obligation. Neither should regard it as a right I should be entitled to.

More than anything, I see it now as a God-given privilege. Even if I don’t earn much from it, and even if I don’t get famous for it, it is a wonderful privilege to write.

When I consider writing as a privilege, I remember its essence as a gift. A gift is something to be grateful for and and something to be taken care of with joy.