Most of us Christians were taught that if we ask God for something in prayer, we shall receive. But why is it that many of our prayers seem to be unanswered? Why do we ask and not receive?

I think that it is a dangerous thought to spread the idea that God will give us everything we ask. Why? Because it is not true. For even if God is good and God is powerful, He cannot and will not give us everything we ask.

Must a good father always give in to the wishes of his children? No. And it is the same with God. God, in His wisdom, knows what is best for His children. And because He loves them, He wouldn’t give them things that are not good for them. Even if they ask.

Let us remember some of the Bible verses that remind us about asking God:

“…delight yourself in the LORD,

and he will give you the desires of your heart.”

– Psalm 37:4, WEBBE

“Most certainly I tell you, whatever you may ask of the Father in my name, he will give it to you. Until now, you have asked nothing in my name. Ask, and you will receive, that your joy may be made full.” — John 16:23–24, WEBBE

“Which of you fathers, if your son asks for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, he won’t give him a snake instead of a fish, will he? Or if he asks for an egg, he won’t give him a scorpion, will he? If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him?” — Luke 11:11–13, WEBBE

In the first Bible passage, we are told that the Lord will give us the desires of our hearts if we delight ourselves in the Lord. It means that we must first align our desires with the will of God.

In the second quoted verse, we are told to ask in the name of Jesus. And what does it mean to ask in His name? What does the name of Jesus stand for? It stands for truth, for purity, for wisdom, for love and for every good thing. That is the perspective in which we are to ask. For how could we ever dare to ask for anything evil in His name?

Lastly, we are reminded that asking God is like asking a good father, a father who will not give bad things to his children. Were we not also assured that the Father will give us the Holy Spirit if we only ask?

Let us never feel frustrated whenever we feel our prayers are not answered. Let us trust instead that God hears us and that He loves us so much. Does He not know the deepest cries of our hearts? And will He deprive us of anything that would be for our eternal good?

God is so good that even His silence is filled with wisdom and His “no” is better than our grandest desires.

There is a question that often comes to mind whenever we try to seek the presence of God. How does God really see me? Does He love me? Or does He hate me because of my many sins?

While I’d like to keep the idea that He loves me as a Father loves His child, I can’t help but to think also that He may not be pleased with me. Weren’t there times in the Bible when Jesus was displeased at people? He was disappointed at their lack of faith. He was often amazed at some people’s stubbornness. And He honestly criticized the Pharisees and Sadducees, calling them hypocrites in front of many. Didn’t He also say at one point that their father was the devil?

If I were to stand before Him today, what would He say? How would He look at me?

I would admit that this is no easy matter to discuss and that a short article about this won’t be enough. And before anything else, I’d like to point to the great wisdom of God. There is so much that we can’t understand and there is so much mystery that requires our faith. But I’d like to touch on this subject as a start to a deeper study and reflection.

Going back to the question, I think it would be presumptuous if I would assume Jesus would always be pleased with me. I must admit that it is very possible that He may look at me with disappointment, especially after committing a serious sin.

Yes, God is love. But love is not something that is pleased with what’s bad.

“…love is not happy with evil, but is happy with the truth.” — 1 Corinthians 13:6, GNT

“I am Thrice Holy, and I detest the smallest sin. I cannot love a soul which is stained with sin; but when it repents, there is no limit to My generosity toward it. My mercy embraces and justifies it. With My mercy, I pursue sinners along all their paths, and My Heart rejoices when they return to Me. I forget the bitterness with which they fed My Heart and rejoice at their return…Tell sinners that I am always waiting for them, that I listen intently to the beating of their heart… when will it beat for Me?” — Diary of Saint Maria Faustina Kowalska, 1728

Herein then is the key to begin understanding the mystery. The key is true repentance and faith.

God is never pleased with what is wrong, but He never turns away from a contrite heart. He detests the proud but receives the humble of heart.

When we sin therefore, we should never think that God is indifferent or that He would tolerate our wrongdoings. God is Just. But when we come to see our failures, let us never let our pride get in the way of returning to Him and asking for forgiveness. God is Merciful and He listens to those who sincerely seek His help.

Let us remember the Parable of the Pharisee and the Tax Collector.

“Two men went up into the temple to pray; one was a Pharisee, and the other was a tax collector. The Pharisee stood and prayed by himself like this: ‘God, I thank you that I am not like the rest of men: extortionists, unrighteous, adulterers, or even like this tax collector. I fast twice a week. I give tithes of all that I get.’ But the tax collector, standing far away, wouldn’t even lift up his eyes to heaven, but beat his breast, saying, ‘God, be merciful to me, a sinner!’ I tell you, this man went down to his house justified rather than the other; for everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, but he who humbles himself will be exalted.” — Luke 18:10–14, WEBBE

Whenever we ask then, “How does God really see me?”, let us look at ourselves and our inner motives. Let us ask ourselves this question instead, “Am I sincerely seeking God with a contrite heart?”

“If the greatest sinner on earth should repent at the moment of death, and draw his last breath in an act of love, neither the many graces he has abused, nor the many sins he had committed would stand in his way. Our Lord would receive him into His mercy.” — St. Therese of Lisieux

“…when a soul sees and realizes the gravity of its sins, when the whole abyss of the misery into which it immersed itself is displayed before its eyes, let it not despair, but with trust let it throw itself into the arms of My mercy, as a child into the arms of its beloved mother…Tell them that no soul that has called upon My mercy has been disappointed or brought to shame.” — Diary of Saint Maria Faustina Kowalska, 1541

A lot of people have been so disappointed with the sufferings of this life that they could no longer believe in a God who loves them. They have seen so much unfairness and injustice in this world. They have witnessed tremendous hurts that they find it so hard to continue believing in a good God.

How could there be a good God if He allows so much evil in this world? Could He not see the plight of the poor and the weak? Why is He silent when so many are asking for His help?

Frustrated and defeated, they cast away all hope and urge people to do the same. It seems simpler not to believe in God anymore. There is no God. And there is no heaven or hell after this life. Only people like us can help other people.

It is not mine to cast judgment upon those who believe so. I have not lived their pain. I have not experienced their tragedies.

But if I may ask something, I ask that I not be deprived of my hope. And my hope is in a God who loves us despite all the darkness that we currently see.

Don’t take away my hope, and don’t take away the hope of other people who cling to their faith in Him who could do all things.

God may be silent and God may seem distant. But that doesn’t mean He is gone. That doesn’t mean He will never hear His people.

For which is the better thought? To believe that there is no God because of so much evil? Or to believe that God will one day vanquish all evil and pain?

No matter how much I want to, I can never help every suffering person in this life. Who could possibly restore the sight of every blind person? Who could possibly make the deaf hear and the lame walk? Who could give justice to whom it is due? Only God can.

Because my belief in God does not mean that every suffering will already be vanquished here on earth. But it means that I have hope for heaven. It means that I have faith in a God who can give us far more than what we have ever lost. I believe in Him who alone can heal both our body and soul, who can wipe away ever tear and who can give us that kind of happiness we could never even dream or imagine.

“Death is no more than passing from one room into another. But there’s a difference for me, you know. Because in that other room I shall be able to see.” — Helen Keller

“Earth hath no sorrow that heaven cannot heal.” — St. Thomas More

“For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which will be revealed towards us…For we were saved in hope, but hope that is seen is not hope. For who hopes for that which he sees? But if we hope for that which we don’t see, we wait for it with patience.” — Romans 8:18, 24–25 (WEBBE)

“Things which an eye didn’t see, and an ear didn’t hear,

which didn’t enter into the heart of man,

these God has prepared for those who love him.”

– 1 Corinthians 2:9 (WEBBE)