Dear Joyce,
I just discover your site and when I scroll, I am interested and I am going a love problem.
I met this guy when we are still in 1st year college. The first time I saw him,I had already crush on him. Then when the semestr ends, when we are to take our exam ,he told me at my back I love you. At that moment I don’t know what to do or say. We had already our sem break and that’s the time, I felt strange feeling that I like to see him. But he did not enroll in the next sem.
After 1 year he enrolled again and my feelings still the same, my hearts beats faster and faster if he is there. My friend asked me to get his number but they are the one who get it. We quit texting each other but we didn’t go together outside. Until when I finish my study and work abroad that’s the time we decided to become Bf and GF. Our communication last only for 2 months and when I am trying to call him, he is not answering. Until I decided not to contact him again. When I finish my contract, I go home. I had no idea about him anymore.
One day when we are roaming around the mall, I saw one stall that there family business that one. I bravely asked if they know the name of my BF, and his cousin told me he is not anymore going to school. I felt sad for that. For now I am away from home but I will go home this March. And I communicated with his cousin to explain why I am asking for my BF because they don’t know between us. And I will just give a letter to give to his cousin. Maybe I will write in my letter, “Bakit nawala ka, hindi ka man lang nagpaalam. Alam mo hanggang ngayon ikaw parin ang mahal ko” (Why did you leave without saying goodbye? Until now, you’re still the one I love)
So stupid to hear and say pero Maam Joyce, mahal ko pa rin siya hanggan ngayon (I still love him). mag 11 years na siya lang ang inibig ko (for 11 years, he was the only one I loved).D ako makapa-move on kasi wala rin closure (I can’t move on). Sabi ko sa sarili ko last na yong magbibigay ako ng letter kung di siya sasagot, cguro its time to move on. (I told myself, this will be the last time, and if he does not reply, it’s time to move on). Pero mahirap kasi sinabi ko sa sarili ko,siya ang mapapangasawa ko. Kaya hanggang ngayon siya pa rin. (But it’s hard because I told myself he is the one I’m going to marry and he is still the one until now.)
Ano pong gagawin ko,dko alam (What will I do?) Please help me! Thank you.
From Clarissa
RESPONSE FROM JOYCE:
Dear Clarissa,
It really hurts to say goodbye to someone we love, especially when there is no clear closure yet. We are left wondering what really happened, and what went wrong. But much as we want to, we have to move on. Love is a relationship between two people. It cannot work out if you are the only one who is trying to save it. From what you wrote, I can see that you have already done much. And you have waited for a very long time. But your loved one must also do his part. If he does not do anything, there is nothing you can do anymore but to let him go. Clarissa, there might be another person who is waiting for you right now, or someone you will meet in the future who is ready to be in a relationship with you. I pray that you may have the courage to move on and find that person who truly deserves your love.
Yours in prayer,
Joyce
The thing about hope is that it’s a positive force that shines the most when it’s dark. When everything’s going well, we hardly notice it’s there. But when things go against us, when our dreams fade and when we see no immediate reprieve from our troubles, that’s when hope does its best work for us.
"Where Hope Can Be Found"