I have often heard of the story of Jesus walking over water, and that of Peter whom He summoned to come to Him. So many times, yes, I have heard it, yet I never truly understood.How it felt to walk over the waters. How it felt to be truly dependent on someone, and yet so truly free.
Oh, how joyful it could have been! How frightening, but how joyful! It’s almost like flying, like soaring over thin air.
If you’ve ever had a great shift in your consciousness lately, you must have also experienced what Peter felt when He saw the wonders of Jesus. Bread is multiplied, the sick are healed, the dead are raised, man can walk over the sea! Could you imagine his excitement? Could you imagine his desire to walk just like Jesus? Peter longed for it all and he did! But everything was so new and so wonderful to him that he was frightened. He was frigtened it wouldn’t last. He was frightened it was too good for him to experience. And so when the first signs of trouble comes, his fear overpowers him and he starts to sink in disbelief.
How much faith does a person really possess? Enough to step over the water, enough to do that one act of trust, of surrender, and yet not enough to walk the long path towards Jesus.
“Why did you doubt? Oh, you of little faith!”
Why could you not sustain your faith? Why could you not carry on towards the end? Why could you not believe your joy? Why could you not believe that the man at the other side of the lake is there to make sure that you receive joy, and that you may have it to the full?
God’s Grace is so great, so much that it overwhelms us!And after a few steps over the water, after a few breathtaking, joyful moments beyond any comparison, we doubt if we are ever allowed to go on. Within ourselves we know we don’t deserve this much. It overwhelms us that we are frightened and we don’t know what to do. For who are we to deserve this? Who are we to walk over the creatures of the sea? We are not even adept at walking over land, where we often stumble, and yet here we are where we do not belong. What are we doing walking over the waters? Who are we at all?
Just when Jesus intends to give us the next great experience, we start to sink in disbelief. Just when He is about to command the next big wave to bow before us, we tremble with the surging tides around. In our heart we desire for more, yet we couldn’t believe it. We want to go on yet we are afraid that God may soon raise the stop signal, and so we make the first step to halt. We couldn’t bare the anticipation and so we decide to quit before He even tells us so.
Yet my friend, there is no quitting. And there are no stop lights. Only our fears do that. Only our disbelief. Only our incapacity to accept more grace, more blessings, more joy in every approaching moment than we ever dreamed we could possess.
Find hope in your darkest hour.
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