“This hidden heroism is done with tenderness and with courage when someone is sick at home.” – Pope Francis
It is hard to think of a more difficult suffering than to see our loved ones in great pain. Many times, we feel we’d rather be in their place than witness what they’re going through.
It is this very difficulty however that allows much grace also to come to us. It is this “hidden heroism” that allows each one of us to be saints in what seems to be an ordinary life.
Here are some of the things we can take note of as we take care of our loved ones:
1. Be Spiritually Strengthened
This is a journey we cannot do alone. We need God’s help, both for ourselves and for our sick loved ones. Our days may be filled with so many things to do, but we must make time even for short prayers. Prayer will remind us that we have Someone who watches over us, that there is a Father to whom we can go to when we can take no more.
If it possible to pray the rosary with your sick family member, set a routine in which both of you can pray. Even if the sick person is too weak to participate vocally, let him participate in silence as he listens to you. In this way, even your loved one is strengthened spiritually.
Attend mass and be strengthened by receiving the Eucharist. If your loved one is too sick to go to mass, request for a lay minister to bring him communion at home.
You may also want to read, “Prayers for Healing.”
2. Have Patience With Yourself
No matter how hard you try, there will be days when you may not be able to control your temper or when you may make mistakes you never intended to make. Have patience with yourself. Distressing yourself over your faults cannot make things better. What’s important is to rise from your falls and carry on.
3. Be More Understanding
Our sick loved ones may become impatient too with their situation and they may not always be in a good mood. They may even become depressed. As much as we want them to think positively, we must give them as much understanding as we can given their current limitations. We must ask for the grace to be as compassionate as possible, to love as Jesus Himself loves the sick and the suffering.
4. Take Care of Your Health
There may be a lot of days when taking care of your loved one would require you to sleep late or even not to sleep at all. But you must remember to rest and to take care of your own health whenever the situation permits it. Eat a healthy diet. Do some exercise. Walk outdoors for a few minutes to get some fresh air. Not everything may be possible, but always do what you can to take good care of your health.
5. Ask For Help
Our own strength may not always be enough. We must seek the help of others like family and friends so we can also take a break and renew our strength. We must also have people we can talk to when our trials become too difficult for us to bear in our own hearts. It helps when we know that someone is listening to us or that someone is able to understand what we’re going through.
If it is possible, we need to assign somebody to be an assistant or a second in command to us, someone who can take over for us whenever we can’t be in charge anymore for one reason or another.
6. Take It One Day At a Time
Worry can never empower us in this journey. We must learn to live one day at a time. And when things become too difficult, we must learn to live one moment at a time. Solve only the problems that need to be resolved for the day. Do whatever tasks are possible at the moment. Don’t think of the many days ahead. God provides for what we need today. Surrender your worries to Him who can take care of all your tomorrows.
7. Hold On To Joy
It may seem almost impossible at times, but we must not let the gloom around us overpower the joy within our hearts. Joy is not like happiness. Joy can exist side by side with sorrow because joy is like hope and faith and love. Joy does not depend on our circumstances but on our attitude. It depends on whom we are holding on to, and we know that it is only in God we rely upon.
Whenever the situation allows, do some things that remind you of your joy and hope. You can listen to some inspirational or uplifting music. You can read your favorite book. If there are children in the house, you can play with them and even share in their innocent laughter. We are all God’s children after all. And children will remind us that there is always grace in the present moment God has given us.
“May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that you may abound in hope by the power of the holy Spirit.” – Romans 15:13, NABRE
You may also want to read, “Bible Quotes on Healing”.
The thing about hope is that it’s a positive force that shines the most when it’s dark. When everything’s going well, we hardly notice it’s there. But when things go against us, when our dreams fade and when we see no immediate reprieve from our troubles, that’s when hope does its best work for us.
"Where Hope Can Be Found"