Category: Words of Wisdom

The Tears We Cried in Silence

“The most painful tears we cried, were the tears we cried in silence…”

When was the last time you cried?  When was the last time your cried your tears in silence?  You must have felt deeper pain.  You must have hurt so much more.

People often do not know the silent tears that we cried.  They think we’re ok when we’re really crying and hurting deep within.

Some of the reasons why we may cry in silence are:

1. We don’t want to appear weak and thereby be avoided by other people
2. We don’t want to add burden or worry to those who love us
3. We know we would not be understood anyways and crying will only complicate things

The tears cried in silence are more painful because those tears were those that are most alone.  Hidden from the world, it remains unrecognized and uncomforted.

It would have been a lot easier to cry with people who can support you.  It would have been easier if everybody knew what you’re going through.

But when you cry in silence, you’re all alone in your tears.  People may even judge you because they don’t understand that you’re already trying the best you could.

In some instances, you may even have tried to tell people how you’re already hurting, but they don’t believe you or they refuse to believe you.  They may think you’re merely trying to seek attention or that you’re just seeking an excuse from doing something they expected you to do.

Here is a quote from the book Surviving Depression:

“I don’t know why I want to cry.  When my friends and I go out to dinner sometimes I tell them how I am feeling.  As soon as I start, they say, ‘Do we have to listen to that again?  Get over it.  Everybody has something to deal with.’ I just want someone to listen to me.” (Cherrie)

“Try harder, be brave, don’t be such a cry baby.”  And so you’re hurt all the more by the things that people say.

During such times, it is even more painful because you have no choice but to cry silently.  Your tears have been rejected, and so you must cry them all alone.

Below is an excerpt from the true personal experience of Sister Faustina when she was suffering from a grave illness (Diary of the Divine Mercy):

After breakfast, the Sister Infirmarian came along and asked, “Sister, why didn’t you go to Mass?”

I answered that I couldn’t.  She shook her head disdainfully and said, “Such a great Feast Day, Sister, and you don’t even go to Mass!” and she left my cell. 

I had been in bed for two days, writhing in pain, and she hadn’t visited me; and when she did come, on the third day, she did not even ask if I were able to get up, but asked irritably why I hadn’t got up for Mass…and all my tears flowed silently toward the Heart of Him who alone understands what pain and suffering is.

There is One, who will always understand and see your tears for what they really are.  God is there in all your silent cries, catching your every tear and honoring them, even sharing His own tears for you.

“You keep track of all my sorrows.

You have collected all my tears in your bottle.

You have recorded each one in your book.”

 -Psalm 56

Know that you are never truly alone.  In times when you feel like there’s no one who is willing to listen to your cries, offer your every tear to God.  He hears your silent cries and keeps them safely within His own wounded heart.

There are times when I feel
as though nobody knows
what I’m going through –
how sad it is, how empty
how I struggle with pain
that almost overpowers me.
Yes there are times when I’m tempted
to think I’m all alone,
but GOD SEES.

“Yet the most difficult things are not those seen and known by the world but those deep within your soul, unseen and unknown by anyone except Jesus.  It is in this secret place that you experience a little trial that you would never dare to mention to anyone else and that is more difficult for you to bear than martyrdom.” – Streams in the Desert

Related Posts:
Why Do We Hide Our Tears From The World?
God Sees
It’s Ok to Cry
We Have a Right to Feel Hurt and Angry

“It takes ten times as long to put yourself back together as it does to fall apart.” – Mockingjay, Book 3 of The Hunger Games

Falling Apart

Falling apart is never easy.  It’s like watching yourself break into a million shattered pieces, not knowing whether you could put the pieces back again and be the whole person that you were.  Falling apart is falling into brokenness.  It is also falling into aloneness, for in that dark place of brokenness, few people would ever want to reach out and take part in your darkness.

Picking Up the Pieces

All these is hard, and yet what’s really more difficult is picking up the pieces one by one and putting yourself back together.  Yes, it takes ten times as long, even a hundred times as long.  By picking up those pieces, you face all your hurts again.  By putting them back, you re-live all your sufferings, your shame, your anger.  You can’t put all the pieces back without learning from them and becoming stronger.  To stay as you were is to fail to hold them back together, and you would only fall apart again.

Awareness and Kindness

Many people do not realize this and so they are careless with their words or their actions.  They don’t know how others are merely holding on, trying hard not to fall apart.  Awareness is sometimes the key to kindness.  Had they been aware of the other person’s struggles, they could have been gentler and more careful of other people’s hearts.  Do something of the sort today.  Try to be kinder and more tolerant.  Forgive more.  Love more.  Other people may already be falling apart.

Mockingjay (The Final Book of The Hunger Games)

Questions We’re Often Afraid to Ask
• Why should we grow up just so we’d grow old and die?
• Why are there people who can barely eat one meal a day while there are others who just throw away what they can’t eat?
• Why do we fill ourselves with pride when it is the humble that are easiest to love?
• If life is so short, why do we waste so much time?
• If we are so certain that we are right, why do we need to convince other people that we are right indeed?
• If we sacrifice our lives for someone we love, does it mean we no longer love ourselves?
• Why is it so important to have something to look forward to?
• If you can be the richest person in the world but then you would need to lose your memory, will you give it up?
• If you could have the power to foresee everything that’s ever going to happen in your life, will you receive that power?
• Would you rather be strong or would you be the one being taken care of?
• If you need to sacrifice one person’s life in order to save many, will you do it?
• How can mercy and justice exist at the same time?
• If you can live forever in this world, will you?
• If you would no longer have to work to earn money, what will you do?
• Would you rather be beautiful, or would you be the one gazing at a beautiful face?
• If you could change one thing in your past, will you?
• Why do we say we are ok when we are really hurting deep within?
• If everyone we talk to just wants to have a better world, why couldn’t we have one for a long time now?
• Would you rather that you’re in control of everything or that God is?

Are You Enjoying The Company of Friends?

Friends are gifts in our earthly journey. Their company is a blessing that gives warmth to our lives. Are you enjoying the company of good friends in your life right now? Then you are truly blessed. Trustworthy companions are God-sent and must be cherished and taken care of for life.

If I Could Ask God One Prayer

If you can face your God at this very moment, what prayer would you ask of Him? A solution for a grave personal problem perhaps. Riches that would help you serve other people better? An end to the world’s problems on peace? Forgiveness for the many sins you have committed? What would it be?

I used to think of it as a very difficult decision, on what prayer indeed I would lift up to my God. Until one night when one thought struck me, a prayer I would desire not only for myself, but for every man trying to make it in this life.

It’s a very simple prayer, nothing as grand as peace and prosperity for all, nothing as glorious as mansions I’d like prepared for me when I get to heaven.

If I could ask God one prayer, this is what I’d pray for: I’d pray that for each and every man that journeys in this road called life, there be at least one person who’d stay beside him, at least one person who’d make him feel he is not alone.

And by such a person I don’t necessarily mean a lover or a soul mate as everyone seems to be looking for, just one person who’d sincerely care, one person who’d love another as though that other is a part of his very own life: a child who’d write you a birthday card saying how much she really loves you, a mother who’d stay through the night and take care of you when you are sick, an aunt who’d listen to your heartaches when you’ve got no one to tell it to, a sister who’d treat you to an ice cream parlor when you didn’t make it to the auditions you went to, a friend who’d take a leave from work just so she can keep you company whenever you feel so far from home.

This is what I would pray for. This is what I believe would help each of us face whatever difficulties we are going through.

It is true that we meet a lot of people everyday, and it may be true that we even call many of them our friends. But who is your friend really? When things go wrong and the going gets tough, who would stay with you and stick around? Who would sacrifice their comfort just so they can comfort you?

Perhaps if there is one such person we know who truly cares for us and takes accountability for our lives, we’d all feel a little better, and we wouldn’t feel so afraid. Because in truth, what many of us fear the most is the fear of being alone, the fear of having no one who would care for us, and of having no one who would expect the same kind of concern from us.

We will never be content in being loved as part of the crowd, as a mere part of the group, not even in the collective sense of being all children of God. For though we are part of one body, each of us is a unique person who needs to be recognized, appreciated and loved.

We have to know that God knows our name, and that He has written our name in the palm of His hand. We have to know that He would leave the 99 sheep behind so He can look for us and make sure that we are found. We have to know that we matter as a person, that we are seen, and that somebody’s going to miss us when we die.

Won’t you be God’s warm hands today and hold just one trembling hand, keeping it from turning numb and stone-cold? Won’t you be God’s ears today, attentively and patiently listening to someone who would like to believe nobody cares anymore? Won’t you be God’s voice today, speaking words that empower and uplift, making another person feel how important he is to you? Won’t you be God’s heart today, inviting somebody in with whom you will be responsible for, devoting and even sacrificing your life so that you may bring him healing and love and joy?

Won’t you let another person know that somebody enjoys her company, somebody delights in the way she laughs, and somebody looks forward to seeing her again? For these indeed are the things we need, simple things most of us often find so easy to ignore and to forget.

Much as we desire to be noble and to claim an undying love for all mankind, maybe what the world needs now is just one person, fully devoting oneself to another, making real the manifestation of God’s immeasurable love for each and every person He called His own. We cannot measure that in numbers, but in how well we were able to reflect unto another soul God’s deep, sincere, intimately personal and all encompassing love.

What Can I Give?

What can I give to the person who gazed with me the sky, the sea and the morning? Who ran with me, and chased with me the wind that rushed against my cheeks? Who walked side by side with me, and held my hand in warmth, reassuring me that I am not alone?

Who dreamt with me and believed with me, that dreams do come true and are oftentimes just within your reach? Who talked to me her all – her love, her life, her soul? Who listened to me as I poured out everything my heart and mind can ever say?

Who sang with me and danced with me and prayed with me? Who praised and worshiped with my spirit the Great One that created it and blessed it with another so reflective of His love? Who ate with me and slept with me when this tired body could take no more? Who wept with me and rejoiced with me? Who argued with me and reasoned with me? Who learned with me what life is really all about?

Truly, I can never give enough to such a person, in the same way that I can never really thank Him enough who gave me such a friend.

 

A Poem On Friendship

I may not always be by your side,
but my prayers will be with you.
I may not always help you,
but deep inside you know I want to.
I may not always do what you like,
but I will do the best I can.
I may not always understand,
but we can still walk hand in hand.
I may not be the perfect friend,
I may not be the best out there,
but in spite and despite all these,
you can be sure somebody cares!

“Who are my friends?
Are they the ones
Who never hurt me
And never let me down?
Are they the ones
Who are always there
And will never leave me alone?
Let me not seek my God
In my friends

For I shall only be disappointed
Only this I know:
That friends are precious gifts
And despite all their weaknesses,
They have claimed me
As their own.”

He who has found true friends has found a real treasure. By finding people he could draw close to his heart, he has already divided his sorrows and multiplied his joys.

His friends open up to him another world, a new world to discover, to cherish and to explore. He learns new things from them. He discovers new things that can make him happy.

When he opens up his own world to them, his happiness is also multiplied because he sees the joy in the eyes of his friends. He is able to share to them something new. He is able to impart a significant part of his life.

Friendships are therefore like bridges. We go back and forth to draw out happiness and to share our own happiness in return.

Friends help one another grow. By constantly trying to understand the other, friends extend themselves and become better persons.

Why be alone when you can be with another? Why grow alone when you can grow together?

Even in business undertakings, having a core group of people you can trust and depend upon creates a big impact to your success. You don’t have to think of everything on your own. You don’t have to do everything yourself. In times when you are too weak to perform your task, you know that there will be another hand to help you out.

Friends also reveal to you who you are. They are like clear mirrors reflecting the person you have become, the person you have grown into. Do you like what you see? Ask the people who truly know you. They may see things you often fail to see.

Your friends see the strength behind your tears. Your friends see the greatness of your dream behind your seeming defeat. Your friends believe in you even in times when you cannot believe yourself.

Some people ask what is the difference between a family and a friend. All I can say is that you can never have a true friend without considering her as a real part of your family.

Together, your family and friends give you a home to come home to, a warm place where you can just be yourself and be loved for who you are.

Happy are they who know where their home is. They will never be lost. They will always know how to find their way back to joy.

MAKE FRIENDS

When you have found true ones, you will find how blessed you really are!
I’m glad I was able to reach out to you. And I’m glad you were able to reach out to me. I’m glad I was able to break free from the walls that surrounded me. For indeed, the world is more colorful, and life is more beautiful when shared. Knowing another person is like knowing another world. It is learning new things, engaging in new adventures and finding new places within your heart!

 

Are You Filled With Love?

To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly be broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket –safe, dark, motionless, airless– it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. The alternative to tragedy, or at least to the risk of tragedy, is damnation. The only place outside of Heaven where you can be perfectly safe from all the dangers and perturbations of love is Hell. – C.S. LEWIS

The Mystery of Love

Who can comprehend the mystery of love? Love is more than joy, more than feelings, more than thought, more than we can ever imagine, much more than we can ever desire and be thankful for!

On The Nature of Love

Love is the Father
Love is the Son
Love is that which the Father and the Son express and manifest, that which encompasses both, that which communicates and conveys the most sublime.

Love is personal
Love is real
Love is the most tangible thing you’ll ever know

You lose yourself into love
but then you are never truly lost

You find oneness with the one you love
but in the process learn to discover yourself more

You are strengthened in love
You are defined in love

You can never be a better you apart from love
For only love unites in such a way
as to make the beautiful even more beautiful
and to make each lover stronger and purer than he or she could ever be alone

In love, you are never alone
for you are one with your beloved
you are one without being lost into the empty chasm of your own self

Love is not realizing that you are all there is.  Love is realizing that you are not alone.

 

Love and Perfection

Love does not say,

“I am now PERFECT,

you can now LOVE me,”

for such makes love conditional

upon one’s perfection,

and makes the beloved proud and arrogant

instead of being full of gratitude.

Such a love evokes fear

for it is a love that can easily be lost

upon the slightest mistake

and upon the smallest sign

that the beloved is not worthy of one’s love.

Let those who yearn to know

what true love really is behold –

“I am wretched

but You have lifted me up and LOVED me.

Your LOVE has made me PERFECT!”

 

What’s The Love We Really Seek?

Love is a great thing
greatest of all goods because it renders light every burden
and bears equally all that is unequal.
Because it carries a burden without feeling it,
and renders sweet and pleasing every bitterness.

Nothing is sweeter than Love,
nothing stronger, nothing higher, nothing more sublime
nothing more expansive, nothing more joyful, nothing more abundant

nothing more pleasing in Heaven or on earth
because love is born of God,
nor it can rest upon created things, but only in God.

The lover flies, runs and rejoices,
he is free and nothing can restrain him.
He gives all for all, and has all in all, because above all
he rests in that one Sovereign Good
from whom all good proceeds and flows.
He does not regards the gifts,
but he turns himself above all goods to the giver.

Love often knows no measure,
but burns beyond all measure.
Love feels no burden, values no labours,
would like to do more than it can do,
without excusing itself with impossibility,
because it believes that it may and can do all things.

Love watches, and, sleeping, slumbers not
When fatigued it does not become tired;
when pressed it does not work through constraint;
when threatened it is not disturbed;
but like a lively flame and a burning torch,
it mounts upwards and securely overcomes all opposition.
Whoever loves knows well what this voice says
A loud cry in the ears of God is the ardent affection of my soul, which says
O my God, My Love,
you are all mine,
and I am all yours.

-The Imitation of Christ, Thomas Kempis

 

All The World is Meaningless Without Love!

The radiant sun is nothing
but a big ball of fire
that hovers above us.
If not for love,
what could the sunrise mean?
What could everything mean at all?

Even the brightest of stars grow pale,
Even the moon loses its mystery,
Nothing hides beneath the seas,
and no mountain is ever worth climbing for.

And yet with love,

even a candy wrapper
can be put in a special golden box,
even a torn ticket
can be held with the highest regard.

It is because you walked these streets,
that I come back here again and again;

It is because you sat in this chair,
that I sit as though
this is the most beautiful chair in all the world.

I touch this pen,
and I feel your fingers,
I hear a song,
and tears flow down my eyes.

Everything comes to life
because you have touched them,
but all the world is meaningless
without love.

Love Is Not Blind

LOVE IS NOT BLIND
there is someone
who understands you,
who sees you
even more than you can see yourselF

his eyes are like clear mirrors
reflecting to you
the you he loves and sees

and though you are afraid at first,

your fears are vanquished
and you are able to see through his eyes
what you were afraid to see

love is not blind after all
for love sees more
love sees what no other sees

and looking through those eyes
you finally discover the person within

you discover
the one he loves
the one whose beauty
reaches deep within his soul

you discover
and you see yourself
and you love the more
the one who opened up your own eyes

the only one
who is able to reach your heart.