Letters to Joyce

“Hi, I’m Joyce! If you ever need someone to listen or to pray for you, you can write to me using the form below. You are not alone.”

Note: By writing, you also give me permission to publish your letter. You may want to use an alias or a pen name. 

    318 replies on “Letters to Joyce”

    Dear Joyce My name is Cindy I use to be a strong independent mother of 3 beatifull boys. I had a job my own apartment I was raising my 3 boys I have overcome so much in life including abuse I’ve lways considered myself strong and able to move on and do anything untill recently.You see I got deported and my world has turned upside down I’m very blessed to have my parents helping me out they have taken on the burden of raising my boys I now live in Mex and well I can barely support myself let alone my boys, I have spoken to a lawyer but nothing seems to be happening its been 2 years and I’m loosing faith for 2 years I have missed my sons school activities including there 1st day and mother son dance that my son really wanted me to go my little one is gonna start preschool this year and I wont be there for him it seems like there growing up without me so please I am requesting a prayer to reunite me with my fam they do visit me on weekends and vacations but I want to be part of there life and my son needs me so much please help me pray for my 3 boys who need there mommy thank you

    Dear Cindy, I do pray for you. I pray for you now, and I have shared your request also to other angels who care a lot for you. You are still a strong independent mother. I can see it in the way that you continue to fight for your children, for your family. Never give up hope. God sees us even in our darkest hours. He will never abandon you. Never think there is no way just because you cannot see it yet. It will be revealed in due time, in God’s time. God bless you, Cindy! May you always have the strength for your family.

    Can a mother forget the baby at her breast
    and have no compassion on the child she has borne?
    Though she may forget,
    I will not forget you!
    See, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands…
    -Psalm 49

    By Post Author

    Hi Cindy, thank you for sharing your heart on here. It takes a lot of courage to do so, and it shows that God has blessed you with a strong and faithful heart.

    This experience must be unnerving for you. I can’t imagine what you are going through. Please know that your heart is in my prayers and many others as well.

    Cindy, I do not know why you are in this situation, but I do want to encourage you to remain strong with God. Sometimes we may not understand why we are going through a situation. We may feel as though things are coming apart, but God is there. He will lead you out of the darkness.

    I want to thank you again sharing your heart.

    With much prayers

    Stephen miracle

    Hi,
    I have been struggling with this issue for three years and I need some advise. To some the answer will be a no brainer but for me it’s a struggle. I have been married for 12 years. During those 12 years my marriage has lost communication, intimacy, the desire to be near my spouse because of reasons I don’t want to get into. So I started in an affair 3 years ao with a single man who I have fallen in love with but he see other women as well. He has told me he loves me but this is the way he has always been and doesn’t want to commit to any women. We have tried numerous times to break off this affair but whenever he calls I run back to him. I have explained to him that it kills me inside knowing he “sleeps” with other women. So he suggested we do threesomes with other women. However, this is not what I believe in. I left broken and loss with both relationships I’m in. I have prayed to Jesus to intercede to God for me to take this affair from me but it doesn’t seem to b working. The pain is here in me because this man really doesn’t love me and it hurts knowing no matter how much I love him or what I do for him his before will never change. Please help me to put this in focus.

    Hello Beverly,

    Thank you for your trust, for allowing us to hear you and for giving us the opportunity to talk to you. There are so many things I wanted to tell you that I think our time and space in here wouldn’t be enough. I will however try my best to give you some words that could help alleviate your pain. First of all, problems like these are not no-brainers, they only seem easy for people who do not understand our real struggles, and our hurts. You may have said it that way because you may have seen the solution they would have given you, though knowing such a solution doesn’t make the process any easier or less painful. I have several points I want to tell you:

    1. You’ve said that the man doesn’t really love you. I believe that deep within you, you know this to be true. A man who loves you will not treat you this way. He will not act selfishly. He will not be concerned only of his pleasures and his needs. He would instead do his best to meet the needs of the one he truly loves, and this includes giving her respect, and the chance to be loved by someone else who can give her what he could never give.
    2. I could infer that you have somehow loved this man. You have made yourself vulnerable to him and you gave him your whole heart and soul. It isn’t the time to blame yourself. After all, it isn’t wrong to love. What’s wrong is if we continue to love in ways that are already destructive and hurtful to those concerned.
    3. You can change the way you love this man. You can love him even from a distance, when you are able to give each other the space to heal, to find yourselves again, and to be loved by other people who can love you more.
    4. We can’t always play as Saviors to other people who do not want to be saved. Sometimes, only God can help the person we love the most, and God can work better if we leave it in Him to do His job, if we let go of the person we care about most.
    5. You have to offer God your Isaac. Who is Isaac? Isaac is Abraham’s only Son whom he loved the most. You have to offer God the most important thing or person in your life. It’s only by this that you can allow Him to be God and that you could remove all idols in your life which you have placed in a position that only God can fill.
    6. Before we can really love other people, we have to be able to love ourselves first.
    7. You need to know how much God really loves you so you can start loving yourself. Unless we truly feel how God loves us, unless we know how truly important we are in His eyes, we will not be able to treat ourselves fairly, we will not be able to really love ourselves.
    8. You have to surround yourself with other people who can support you in this. People who will not judge you, but will be firm enough to teach you how you should stand up for yourself and for getting the things you truly deserve.
    9. It takes time, much time. You’ve got to be patient with yourself. But you must never give up! You have to get up again each time you fall. You’ve got to remember God cheering you on.
    10. You can start by having a compelling reason for you to leave the man. Many times, this compelling reason is the intensity of the pain and emptiness we already feel. This great pain would urge us to stop whatever it is we are doing just so we won’t hurt anymore. To others, it is having in mind the welfare of his/her loved ones. When we’re not ok, other people close to us suffer the most. They also hurt the most for us too. Many times, we can tolerate our own pain, but can we accept it that we are also hurting the people we love the most?

    God bless you, Beverly! I know that leaving the man will leave a very great void in your heart. And that’s what scares us most. But make use of this time to feel the void in your heart with something much better. Fill it with God’s love! It is real. And Jesus is a real person whom you can really be intimate with. You need not feel alone. Dare to make that move towards freedom. God will be there to fill in everything you would ever need along the way. Do write to me again if you ever need someone to talk to.

    With much love,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Dear Beverly
    First of all thank you for writing in. That shows that you are truly seeking for a way out of your present situation. It would seem to me that you sought a relationship outside marriage because your marital relationship was not working. And in some ways you see the pattern repeating itself with the other relationship as well.

    I don’t have any ‘answers’ for you, Beverly. But I would like to share from my personal experience. I found myself going from one relationship to another with the common thread being that the other person was not willing to commit to me. I would give the relationship my all but not get the same back in return.

    It wasn’t until I realized that the problem was not with the men but with me that things changed. What was my problem? Low self-esteem. Deep within I didn’t think I was lovable. When I began to work on loving myself, and truly allowing the love of God to heal me, I found love in another.

    I pray that you will begin the process of loving yourself. Should you need any guidance on how to start, do connect with us again and one of us would be glad to assist.

    Until then, take care, Beverly and know that you are worthy of love.

    Corinne

    Dear Joyce.
    Ive found that even though I have come so far in this life, past many, many trials and through many, many storms. I need God so very much more in my life to continue to strengthen me and help me to learn something valuable during these trials and storms. You see, I don’t mind these things that most people dread in there life. I will not walk in fear of what will happen, I will walk in the joy of him. I want to be brought back to him when I stray. I want to be reminded that Ive got God to thank in and out of my days for this life Ive been given through Him. So i guess what I am getting at is…pray that I don’t fail him in my faith. I want so very much to live in him all the days of my life! Thank you!

    Dear Charlene,

    Thank you for writing here! You definitely inspire us and the people that would visit this corner. I pray that I would always have the same strong faith as you have, and may you never lose sight of the God who upholds you. You are blessed, Charlene. May you continue blessing other people! 😉

    Love,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    I’m a 31 year old single mum of a 7 year old boy, my son and I quote Jer 29:11 over our life and we believe there’s a brighter day for us coming. I moved citys three times now, never settled, within this time friends and families have let us down. I turn to shut people off because I don’t feel loved or cared for by anyone. I believe in god and I know he is my shelter, strenght, strong tower…I want to be with him more for the rest of my life because he’s the one that cares and loves me more. Right now am looking for a guy who will love me and my son and take care of us. Also we are praying for this house on campus of this Adventist University am currently working with. Please help stand in pray with both of us.

    thanks

    Dear Rose,

    Thank you for writing to us and sharing your prayer concerns. I believe God is with you now, guiding you, being the concerned Father of your 7 year old son. God is indeed the strong and mighty tower we can depend upon even if the rest of the world turns its back on us. I do believe however that God can send us real life angels, maybe in the form of strangers or other friends who will help us at the time we needed it the most. They will come at the appointed time God has set for things to take place. May we never lose hope that there are still people whom God can use as channels of His provision and His love. We pray for you now, and I pray that God will let His presence felt the more in your life through the loving and caring people you will meet in time. I pray for your son. May he grow up knowing that God has been his Father and provider, and that God has never let him down. Be blessed!

    With you in prayer,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Dear Rose
    Jer 29:11 is my verse for life so I feel so connected with you. You are indeed a woman of faith and inner strength. Please be assured of my prayers for both your intentions. In the meanwhile, take good care of yourself.
    Warm regards and many blessings.
    Corinne

    Thanks Joyce and Corinne am blessed and touched by your replys, it feels like God himself is speaking through both of you.

    thanks once again and God Bless

    Rose

    I want to be completely happy and satisfied with LIFE.. i get depress almost everyday.. i worry about a lot of things.. i worry about my mother’s health, GOD she can not be sick, we can not afford expensive treatments.. I also worry about the education of my children, i pray that i can continuously provide for their education.. And i need to be productive to be able to support them.. GOD help me with all the worries i have..

    Dear Charina,

    I know that it would do no good if I tell you not to worry right now. I myself worry a lot sometimes, though God has enabled me through the years to overcome those worries in ways that continue to amaze me. There is a video however, that was able to summarize most of the things I wanted to say about worry, and I hope you’d watch it at this link:

    http://itakeoffthemask.com/words-of-wisdom/why-worry-a-video-by-andy-stanley/

    I pray for you right now that God may replace your worries with peace, and your many concerns with trust in His goodness. There is really so much that we don’t know, so many things we cannot control.

    Even people with stable jobs and lots of money don’t really know just how long they’re going to live. Even wealthy nations could succumb to economic crisis, or to natural disasters that could wipe away in a few minutes what has been built through many years.

    We can only trust in God. Only God has control of everything, and in Him, our hopes can never fail.

    With love,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    speak to me GOD!! sometimes i wonder if you listen.. i have always believe in you but help me to believe in you more..

    Dear Joyce,

    I do thank you with all my heart for sharing such wonderful words with me.Thank you from the bottom of my heart..I want you to know that You are a very big help in this “darkest” time of my life.

    I’ve watched the video and YES!! It was very comforting..GOD knows all the worries i have.. that is all i need to know.. HE will take care of all of my needs and HE doesn’t need my help..

    GOD BLESS YOU AND YOUR MISSION FOR BEING A BLESSING TO SO MANY… SHARING IS REALLY BOTTOMLESS.. You really do a lot to people’s souls.

    I have always considered myself to be a caring individual but believe that God does not like me and is punishing me for mistakes made in my past. I have intense moments of ‘seeing the light’ and feeling Gods presence but then something will go wrong and I end up in a whirl of negative thoughts, self doubt and fear.
    For the past 2 years I have had a terrible time – my business collapsed and I was forced to go bankrupt. I suffered a major depressive episode and have had a terrible time trying to get back up on my feet again both financially and professionally. My son is under-going assessment for Aspergers which can be very difficult for my husband and I to deal with every day but we are coping. My husband and son are my only family and I have a couple of really good friends – all of whom have been very loving, loyal and patient.
    The depression started to lift and I have had a small succession of temporary jobs but nothing deeply satisfying. In one job (at an art gallery) the owners were very controlling and the man made unwanted sexual comments towards me. Not wanting to cause a scene, I choose to leave and gave in my notice. They were not very pleased but I knew I had to leave for the sake of my health.
    Anyway, a friend (Gilly) of some years standing asked me if I would go and work for her. She has a fashion business and, having had difficulties with other employees, wanted to work with someone she trusted to look after her business. My salary was to be paid for (as with previous staff) by her very rich (new boyfriend) since her business was not financially capable of paying such. My first instinct, and gut feeling, was NO because I have always found her to be a little selfish and uncaring. However, the need to provide for my family was of utmost importance and I agreed.
    On day two, I realised that I had made a mistake – she was rude to customers, complained about everyone and told me off on many occasions. Not a nice environment I can tell you – very intimidating. Still, I bit my tongue and tried to fit in. Unfortunately, she snapped at me during the second week causing me to cry a little. Not in front of customers I might add. Her response was to tell me that ‘my depression was not good for business’! On that basis, I decided to leave but agreed to stay for a further 5 weeks to ensure that the shop was managed whilst she went away on a luxury holiday in Dubai. I kept my side of the bargain and continued to give my all for her business – even raising sales and recruiting two new members of staff to take my place. While away on holiday, she demanded that we keep the shop open over the Easter period even though others around us were shut. I can tell you that the shop did not have many customers and it was usually the case that no money was taken. However, Gillys boyfriend was ploughing thousands into it and she made the most of his generosity.
    Before I starting to complete job applications again, I asked her if I could say that I had worked with her for 6 months – I did not want to run the risk of a bad reference from the art gallery. She agreed and gave me the impression that this was fine. As a friend, she was well aware of all the difficulties that I had faced over recent months and I thought she cared.
    During my last week with her, she told me she had enjoyed having me with her! I was contacted by a charity in response to an application and offered an immediate interview. My friend became very difficult and would not allow me to attend interviews during work time – not even allowing me to do so in my lunch break. This in spite of the fact that the new position – Charity Shop Manager – was ideal for me and my family. To cut a long story short, she ended up telling me ‘not bother coming into her shop again and to return the keys immediately’ I did so with no fuss.
    I had the interview and got the job! Great a new start. Gilly came round to return some things that I had left at the shop and seemed perfectly fine. She had a cup of tea with me and my husband and declared her delight that I had secured the new job – ‘it was meant for me!’ (Her words). She left and I thought all was well.
    Last week, I was called into the office and told that my previous employer was ‘adamant that I had only worked for her for 7 weeks’. This was true but not in keeping with the discussion I had had with Gilly regarding this. I tried to contact Gilly to discuss the matter but she did not return my calls.
    Anyway, I realised that the friendship was over and sent her a text asking for the return of my book ‘Surprised by Jesus’ This book was written by a good friend of mine and is very special to me. My text was not rude or anything – it simply asked her to pop the book through my door.
    Her response was to reply almost immediately informing me that she was tired of my ‘bullying, lies and lack of responsibility’!!!! There is no way I can be described as a bully – honest. I have lied about my time with her but I did seek her agreement (3 times!) and she never expressed any concern – quite the opposite! I have a great sense of responsibility – i volunteer for a local charity and have always met my responsibilities at home and work even when I was very ill. The doctors often remark how hard I have tried to overcome the depression – attending appointments and engaging with all methods of therapy.
    I have never retaliated before but I was angered by her response – all she had to do was return the book. I simply told her that she was a nasty individual who did nothing for others and liked to use people. I reminded her of all the times that I have helped her (money, cleaning, fetching, listening etc) and what little she has given in return. Normally I would not react but I feel really let down by her.
    My job is now under review and I am really concerned that, after all my hard work and trying to get back into life, I will be sacked. I don’t think I could deal with this – it would just seem so unfair and prove that God does not like me.
    I deeply regret my lie but did it for the best of reasons not believing it would harm anyone. I am asking God to forgive me and please let me keep my job.
    Karen x

    Dear Karen,

    Thank you for trusting us and sharing your difficulties. Rest assured we’re praying for you, asking that God may help you and carry you through all the challenges you face.

    Karen, there are times when people disappoint us and hurt us, and those whom we trust and love the most are also the ones to whom we could be most vulnerable from, because we have opened our hearts to them. But Karen, people are not perfect, even the best of us fail sometimes. That is why we shouldn’t put our happiness dependent upon their actions or behavior. We should always look through our lives not through the marred mirrors of others, but through the clear and perfect vision of God who sees us better than anyone else.

    God sees you and knows your needs. He knows the difficulties you’re going through. Put your trust in Him for He can make a way even when there seems to be no way at all. Your daily provision is not really dependent upon imperfect people. It is true that people often assume authority and boast of powers to hire us or to fire us out from our jobs, but God is the Ultimate Authority. He is the one who can touch people’s hearts and cause a change in them for the benefit of those whom He loves.

    He is the One who can grant you a job, a good job, even if all you could see are people trying to block you and pull you down.

    I trust in God’s power and goodness, and He will pull you through despite and in spite all difficulties. God bless you!

    Psalm 56-
    But when I am afraid,
    I will put my trust in you…
    You keep track of all my sorrows.
    You have collected all my tears in your bottle.
    You have recorded each one in your book.

    With Love,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    HI JOYCE,I wanted to ask a solution from u as Ive been having doubts in my mind lately.Ive always been a very confidant plus normal person before but lately I just stay soo upset AND I REALLY WANT TO TALK TO A PSYCHOLOGIST AN UNDERSTANDING AND DEEP PERSON WHO CAN GIVE ME A POSITIVE SOLUTION TO MY STATE,I saw ur sign in the site 2knowmyself so posted here added u in 2knowmyself by name of blue ocean so jouce reply to my problem thanks.

    Dear Noora,

    Thank you for writing to us. I’m not sure however if we could provide you the solution you are looking for, especially if it would require a professional expertise. I think it would do no harm if you would indeed consult a psychologist who can guide you with a step by step process towards the solution you are looking for.

    What we could do however is to assist you as friends naturally do, and to pray for you for spiritual healing.

    I do not know the entire facts that contributed to your being upset. From your posts in 2knowmyself’s forum, what I understood was that you were having trouble in your working environment. But I don’t know a lot about your background or other sources of your problems that may have been the cause of your problems at work. I also don’t know if you have any physical illness that could contribute to depression.

    But based from what I just know, I could feel that you are truly filled with worry. You worry a lot, especially about your working relationships. What they say is that what we worry about is related to the thing that we give the most importance to. Right now, maybe you could have a little rest and reflect on what you really consider important in your life. Is your work the most important thing in your life? Is the opinion of other people the most important thing for you?

    Because if it is not, you should be more focused on what is more important in your life. For example, you can be more focused on what God’s will is for your life. What do you think is God’s will for you today? What do you feel is the thing that God wants you to be doing?

    I hope you find peace in God’s presence. Many times, that’s all that I need in order to resolve the many worries and problems that I have. After praying and basking in God’s holy presence, I become more at peace and I have a better idea of what God wants me to do in my life. Be blessed and peace be with you!

    Kind Regards,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Thanks for ur reply joyce,I just hope that I can talk my way out of my problem as ur sign showed that ur all about healing and providing solutions right.I hope I can get in touch with u in my email so that I can discuss my problems in detail.
    joyce actually my problem isnt related to just my work environment lately Ive been depressed about a lot of things.Im 23 and Ive always had a peaceful kind of life but Ive started to worry a loot these days,WILL u give me suggestions and good advice on how to deal with such problems when i DO TELL U WHATS BOTHERING ME,THANKS.

    Hello Noora,

    I’ve tried to email you at the address you’ve given, but the sending failed. My host says that your mailbox is unavailable?

    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Hi joyce I only have one email and this is it.You can send again and use the name arfa inside the mail as thats my home name ,maybe that will work.
    Any how I will tell u my problem here hope u can advice me better.
    Im engaged and my engagement was totally arranged as it happens in our culture as I never knew about my fiancee,but after my engagement my mom n dad suggested that I talk to my fiancee to have a better understanding.joyce I came to know my fiancee isnt a very responsive or expressive guy at all totally opposite of me whos very expressive in praise or affection.Being raised in a family where i always had my freedom to do what I want now I feel so misunderstood by my fiancee as hes only concerned about his work and time.He is very rigid in his rules as tells me ill never call before seven days n all and if I tell him to call before that he acts very seriously and twice even used harsh words with me which really HURT me badly.Joyce Im not used to listening to such tone of language if someone tries to boss me around and tolerate such coldness on someones part.
    As a result I ve become so depressed and serious when I use to be very outgoing and happy person.I told my problem to my mom but she just tells me not to worry as a result I feel misunderstood?I thought my life partner would be expressive to me for my beauty and care for me not a cold heartless guy who only cares for his work and pride.I cant be happy like this as Ive never experienced such a person even on my birthday he didnt give me any present and when my brothers asked me what he gave me I felt like crying infront of them.plzz tell me joyce what can I do how can I deal with this kind of person and feel contented with myself again.thanks

    Dear Joyce

    I just wanted to thank you for your loving prayers and words – you have helped me to be more accepting and somewhat peaceful about my situation. I am putting all my trust in God.

    I will let you know what happens.

    Kindest regards

    Karen x

    Dear Karen,

    Thank you for letting us know how you’re putting your trust to God. Never give up! It often seems hard at first, but God will fill in whatever may be lacking in our faith. God bless you!

    With Love,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Hi joyce,I checked my inbox but didnt see ur mail sorry for the inconvenience dont know y I didnt get it.If u can plz try sending again or give me ur advice here Id appreciate it,thankss

    Hello Noora,

    I think there is really a problem between our email connections. Is there a way by which you could create another email, maybe thru yahoo or gmail so we can better communicate? 😉

    Love,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    dear joyce,
    hi I think there really is a problem vid my email as it sucks,I checked all my junk mails but couldnt find urs,hah.Anyway I will make new email and send it to u.Could u advice and give me ur insight on my problem here in forum in meantime,thanks.

    Hello Arfa,

    Below is the copy of the email I tried to send to you:

    I hope you get this mail. I have some free time today and I decided to write to you. I am not a psychologist, so I cannot say this will be a professional advice. I am a lifecoach, and I usually charge for consultations, but I have not handled a case like yours before, especially since we are from different cultures and religions. So I thought I’d just give it a go for now, discuss things with you as long as I can devote some time and we can communicate with each other in terms of what we can understand.

    First of all, how do you wish me to call you? Should I use Noora or Arfa?

    I’d like to introduce myself again. I’m Joyce

    I came from a Christian background, I’ve lived in Australia and in the Philippines where we are usually free to choose the one we will marry. So forgive me if I cannot always understand the depths of the pressure you feel in trying to follow your culture. It must be difficult, because we human beings usually want to conform to what the society around us dictates. Aside from that, we want to meet the expectations of important people in our lives, especially our family. I know you don’t want to disappoint anybody. But in the process, it seems you are also disappointing yourself, and you feel you’re no longer happy with your situation and with who you are.

    There was once a prayer that gave me enlightenment and it says:

    Lord, grant me the SERENITY to accept the things I can’t change,
    the COURAGE to change the things which I can,
    and the WISDOM to know the difference.

    In your situation, which do you think applies? Do you think you can do something to change your situation? Or do you think you need to accept everything so you can find peace?

    If you believe you can still do something, what do you think could it be? Could you talk to your family so that they can let you to choose another guy that will truly love you and respect you as a person? Can you defy your own culture? Can you be brave enough to be different and do things differently from what your society expects of you? If they cannot accept your decision, are you ready to leave your place, even your country so you can be yourself in another place? What are you ready to do.

    If you are not ready to do the above, then are you ready to marry a man whom you don’t really like? Are you ready to marry a man who does not really love you or can’t give you the caring and concern you are looking for?

    Life is a decision, and we need to CHOOSE and pay the price for our choices. Which decision are you willing to make? Which can you sacrifice? What situation can you accept.

    Do write to me of your thoughts, and may God grant you the Wisdom to know the answer.

    With Love,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Dear Joyce,
    I need your prayers for my 14 year-old daughter. Last night she said she need to tell me something and that we have to talk. I was shocked when she told me she already have a boyfriend and she said it should be okay for me since she already is 3rd year high school now. I couldnt believe what i heard from my daughter, it made me wanna scream and cry. I was unable to sleep last night because of that.. My problem now is i can not guard her always because i need to work also. I am afraid that something bad might happen if i will not guard her,but i can not afford to lose my job because i am the breadwinner of the family. I do not know what to do now, i need your help Joyce, please pray for us especially for my daughter. She is too young and i know she is not in her right mind now. Thank you so much. And to all the readers out there, i need your prayers, please pray for us.. Thank you.

    Dear Andrea,

    You’re in my prayers right now. I pray that God may send His angels to protect and guide your daughter. I pray that God would grant her the wisdom to do what’s right, and the strength to be able to stand up for what is right. And I pray that He would grant you the power to be able to guide your daughter to the right path. God is still in control. He is our defender and our shield, our provider and our counselor. You have everything you need, Andrea. By faith, you claim today the answers to your prayers. 😉

    With Love,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Dear Joyce,

    Pls pray 4 me. I feel so hopeless and despair. I feel that i couldn’t love people surround me( my family, friends, etc) in fact i can feel that i couldn’t love myself anymore. Feel so lonely and alone. Pls pray 4 me Joyce. =(

    Thank you.

    Dear Min,

    I pray for you now. And I pray that even before you’re again able to love anybody else, you may be able to feel loved. God loves you and wants you to receive His love. In times when we’re not able to give love, it is our first duty to rest first and be still. Allow God to love you first. Receive first the love that you desire to give. 😉 God bless you!

    Sending You My Love,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Hi joyce deary,
    Thankyou so much for ur mail.I wanted to reply earlier to u but my problem isnt solved yet so Im still stuck in thinking over it.Joyce Im a muslim from u.a.e and u can call me noora,as a christian u may not be aware of this that in our religion it is allowed to take the girls consent before arranging her marriage BUT sometimes culture plays a more strong role that religion.
    Joyce I did talk to my parents about my feelings about my fiancee that Im not sure about his character plus personality which leaves me feeling perplexed and in suspense mostly as he doesent even contact with me now.BUT my parents didnt take this seriously as there just worried about their prestige and comfort and not mine.I feel so misunderstood I hopw wish an angel could understand me my feelings which are so precious for me.My parents only say that I have no solid reason to refuse this proposal as they say he is highly educated and will provide for me BUT JOYCE they are blind and deaf to my feelings that he is also a cold uncaring guy who doesnt like to communicate with me,HOW can I make my heart understand such complexities.?His mom n sis came to my house and brought a gift wrapped in a pack in which company my fiancee works I thought he sent the gift but it was really from his sis not him which really broke my expectations.Joyce plz pray for me for my contentment and happiness,I really feel sad and quiet lately,just pray I would have blessings and happiness in my life again,thanks.

    Hello Noora,

    Thank you for your reply. I share with your grief, and how I wish you could already be set free from this dilemma.

    Noora, I feel that this time is a turning point in your life. A very crucial time. A time to be brave, and to be the best you could ever be. It would have been easier for many people to just accept things as they are and to remain quiet in their emptiness, in a life without love and without the freedom to love. But I can sense that you are different. You are someone who needs to remain true to yourself and to what you feel. You are someone who wants true love.

    True love however requires a lot of courage, and a lot of discomfort on our part. It often requires rejection from the people who won’t understand us, and who don’t have the courage to desire the same things that we desire. We have to accept this difficulty if we should ever aim at pursuing true love and freedom. And this could just be the perfect time for you to do that, Noora. This could be the time for you to make a radical turnaround, and to stand up for yourself and for what you believe in, even if the rest of the people around you would reject you for what you will do. You will do this not because you don’t love them, but because you want to love yourself, and you don’t want to reject yourself later on. You will do this because you don’t want to have any regrets later in your life, that you could have done something, but you just didn’t do it. That instead of obeying your heart, you obeyed what others want you to do. Noora, the greatest legacy we can give to our children is to let them know that their parents truly love each other.

    I believe in you, Noora. I believe you will make a decision fit for the kind of person you really are.

    I will leave you with an inspiring quote by Paulo Coelho from the book THE ALCHEMIST:
    “Everyone, when they are young, knows what their destiny is. At that point in their lives, everything is clear and everything is possible. They are not afraid to dream, and to yearn for everything they would like to see happen to them in their lives. But, as time passes, a mysterious force begins to convince them that it will be impossible for them to realise their destiny… It’s a force that appears to be negative, but actually shows you how to realize your destiny. It prepares your spirit and your will, because there is one great truth on this planet: whoever you are, or whatever it is that you do, when you really want something, it’s because that desire originated in the soul of the universe. It’s your mission on earth… To realise one’s destiny is a person’s only real obligation. All things are one. And when you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.”

    Sincerely,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    HI JOYCE SWEETIE,
    Hope ur cool as ever n alive.Im alive n fine by ALMIGHTYS grace.I wish i cud talk to u about my mixed complex feelings as u appear to be such an understanding and mature person.Well my fiancee contacted me trying to talk to me n all,I guess thats normal n all.Joyce I believe in ALLAH and all positive stuff thats a good sign to have faith in ur self even if ur not sure about others.joyce whats ur star?ur sunsign,Im aries have u had experience vd aries people before what there like?will stay in touch vd u remember in prayers thanks.ur cool reader noora.

    Dear Noora,

    I’m glad to hear from you! May the Almighty God bless you always with courage and hope to keep on fighting for life and believing in a good future God has prepared for you. My birthday says I belong to the sign of Gemini since I was born in June. I hope all goes well for you, keep in touch!

    Kind Regards,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    please help me pray for my relationship. am not sure if my boyfriend loves me or not.we’ve been out of contuct for a month now. i think am not perfect and nice enough for him.am confused. help me with my prayer and that God alone will show me the answer to my problem.

    Dear Ericka,

    I’m praying for your happiness. Based from your letter, there is no clear break-up yet with your boyfriend. But is this upon mutual agreement? Or it could be that you and your boyfriend are physically apart and you don’t know what has happened to him as of this time? Is it possible that he got sick or something has prevented him from contacting you? I hope he is well.

    Do continue your prayers that God may lead you both in a clear direction soon. God bless you, Ericka!

    Kind Regards,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Dear joyce

    I am in a relationaship for 2 years and 3 months please pray for us to move on in our relationship, we just separate ways, I do love this man so much that im ready to leave him just for him to be happy , it hurts but accoding to him he needs space…i want him to be happy….im struglling right now the sadness that I have… please help us and pray for us to know the future if we still be together

    Dear Lea, I pray for you now. It isn’t easy letting go of someone we love, but sometimes, love requires the ultimate sacrifice for the good of our loved ones. Lea, if God has destined you both to be together, God will make a way. For now, I admire you for being willing to take a step back and give him the space that he needs.

    With Love,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    I fed up what my mother did to me and i kept telling her that I am married , wife, mother of one child and a husband that are my family. She wont leave us alone for while and it bother me and she still owe us a favors, but she never give us back, she told me that she promise to owe us back but never did. We want to get out of her life because drives me crazy. I know she is old and lost memory, she is 74 yrs old. I cannot stand with her. I need my money to pay my debts. thank you….

    Dear Laura,

    We will pray for you and your mother. If this is a concern about finances, I am certain that God is our Provider and with Him, we can be assured that we will always have all that we need and even more so we could generously give to all. Be blessed!

    Kind Regards,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Hi Brian,

    Your link can be seen by people who view this part of the website. I pray that God may help you and your family. God has proven time and again of His Great Providence just when we thought we couldn’t find a way out. Be blessed!

    Kind Regards,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    I surely appreciate your prayers and comment. You responding speaks volumes. But after all I have limited time to make this happen so can you please make a way for people to see this other than randomly coming across it. I am in a dire situation and I have always had faith and even now I hold on. But i am scared for me and my family. Please help us!

    @Brian Howard – Thank you, Brian. But as we have had no previous transaction, and in order to avoid spam and unwarranted events that will affect the readers of this website, I will not be able to make a formal post of your request. It is not that I do not believe in your concerns, but as of now, I do not have the proper basis to verify and promote it. However, you may post an appeal at the fanpage of this site (with 700 members) so you could seek help personally from the followers of the said fanpage. Here is the link https://www.facebook.com/#!/pages/What-Would-You-Do-In-Heaven/110463968970613

    By Post Author

    Well i guess I understand Joyce and i agree. But i dont like it because I truly am one of the needy. Having no friends or family i am at a stand still and i ask you to pray on it. The more visability i can get the more likely i am to succeed. But hey if it doesnt work out whats one more seperated family in americaright. people are more concerned with forign nations than there american fellos here at home. THANKS

    Hello all.
    I am asking for your prayers. I am here in Ireland and my fiance is in the US. I was there for 5 years but have been unable to get my Visa back to live there again. I have applied for a position within the company I used to work for and I am praying that I get it so I can return to my Fiance.

    I thank you for any help and positive thoughts you can give me.

    Jackie

    Dear Jackie,

    I pray for you now, that you may find the way towards the deepest desires of your heart 😉 I believe that there is truly nothing impossible, especially when we know we’re headed towards the direction where God is leading us. Do persist in your prayers and offer everything to God who alone knows what’s best for us. He will give us the answer at the perfect time. Be blessed!

    “Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart.” – Psalm 37

    Kind Regards,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Dear Joyce,
    Please pray for me and my family. I need God’s providence, we dont have enough for this month Joyce. My salary is too small and not even sufficient until the 15th. I do not know what to do. I was thinking of doing something but i know it is against God’s way. I am so confused right now. Help me and pray for me Joyce.

    Dear Charina,

    I pray for you now, Charina. The Lord will provide! He has proven that He can make a way where there seems to be no way. At just the right time, He will hand us the solution to our problems, so let us not give up, even at the darkest hour, for it may be when the hand of God is working to give us the answer. The 11th hour is the hour when we await to see miracles unfold.

    Let us rest in the stillness of God’s Presence, for therein often lies the answer. I know that it is most difficult to be still during these difficult times, but it’s when we need stillness the most. The answer most often comes after being still and quiet, for it is here when we’re finally able to hear God’s gentle whisper. Listen closely, Charina. Listen for God’s whisper today. All the blessings and grace of God be upon you and shower you with hope! You are loved 😉

    With Love,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Dear Joyce and Corrinne,

    I really need some help. My heart is heavy and I feel that I cant take any more. I am not happy and im ready to move away from the state that I live in. I feel that I can not get ahead here and the harder I try the harder I fall. I feel like these last 2 years have been the worst. Im still looking for a break through. I pray hard and I try to keep faith but its not working. Some days I want to give up. Everything I try to do isnt going right. Mountain after mountain. Im tired. Cant seem to find employement because of my background. Im a single mother with no help. Bills are piling up. On top of that things keep happenning within my immediate family. Sometimes I wonder why cant I get ahead. Why cant I be happy, why do I keep getting hurt. I feel like I have a curse or a strong bind holding me. Even my attitude has changed.Im meaner and my patience is running thin. I am crying out for help. I feel like its so hard…,.,.

    Dear Candice,

    Thank you for writing to us. There are times when we just feel so tired, we’ve done everything we could and yet nothing seems to work out. We’ve used up all our strength and we get nothing back for our efforts. At the back of our minds, we question God. We ask why such things had to happen to us.

    I wish I could give you the answer, but I could not. Only God has the answer,and you must seek it alone from Him. Persist in your prayers! Do not give up now. Don’t stop until you find the answer you’re looking for. But first, you need to enter a place of stillness, of rest. For that’s where we can meet God. I have just posted today’s article about stillness, and I had you in mind while I was writing it, so I hope you check it out here http://itakeoffthemask.com/words-of-wisdom/let-stillness-be-your-first-step-to-healing/

    God bless you and give you rest and peace. You are His beloved!

    Yours In Prayer,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Dear Candice,
    I’ve been through that as a single mom, and I am still struggling. But God has proven that HE truly exists and hears when I call for help, for over a year now. I may not have what I think I need, but what I learned is that God will provide me with what is enough for me, day by day. So most of the time, my prayer is, “Lord, I know the desires of my heart may not be your will, so please help me understand, accept and realize that my will are earthly and yours is eternal to appreciate the beauty of what is here for me now. When I asked you to be my Provider, my Partner, and Father to me and my baby, you have proven so consistent in being that. It is just me who has this problem about being forgetful, being a worrier, or not learning my lesson when a small challenge comes my way. Lord, help me to surrender to your will, and not my own, because you have proven yourself so many times to me and others already. Help me to be in tuned to your silent yet powerful voice and words. Do not ever let me go because I cannot imagine myself without you. I am afraid without you in my life, and please help me surrender to you and point my mistakes when I commit one, in order to do your will, AMEN.

    @Xanthe’s Mom – Thank you for the response! You have inspired many of our readers. God bless you and continue to be there for you!

    By Post Author

    Dear Joyce and other readers…

    I’ve always had plenty of friends and most of them seem to be getting on pretty well with their lives. They have jobs that make them happy and are in serious relationships. Recently I’ve been struggling to get a proper job and struggling being a single mother for over a year. I am usually a positive person but this current state of affairs is making me see only the bad side of life. I’m becoming extremely jealous over everything that my friends have and I don’t. That was never the case before but now I just can’t bring myself to feel happy for them and instead torture myself with thoughts of how unlucky I am. I don’t like feeling this way towards my friends but i can’t help it .I hope that like my friends, my life will someday get better..Life is hard but and it seems getting harder.. Please help and pray for me.. Thank you in advance KAYLA, 28

    Dear Kayla,
    I too have the same feelings sometimes– feeling of envy, jealousy, bitterness, and I even compare other’s blessing from mine. But I guess we both know that these feelings do not come directly from God but arise from negativity which is the devil. Though we may not want to entertain them, sometimes it becomes our escape goat or even a pleasurable quick past time that we just dont recognize. In my struggle as a single mom, I met unexpected earth angels sent by God in my life. One of them shared that you must ask God to help you take away these negative feelings because you cannot do it on your own. You must acknowledge that God is the only ONE who can do it for you, upon His will, and when you ask Him.
    So I asked God to help me take away those similar feeling that you are going through as they were detrimental to me. In prayer, we find peace. In prayer, we find that assurance that those things that we want to have are things we may not need, or things that may just take our attention away from God. God takes away some things in your life and brings them back at the right time…just like in Job’s story in the Bible.
    I tell God now and then, when I am not bombarded by the devil with negative feelings, that I am sincerely happy wherever He let me be in right now because I am comforted that it is His will and I trust Him. But if the devil is trying to bombard me with self pity, envy, or any bad thought, I pray to God, praise Him, and claim loud and proud that Jesus has already defeated the devil thousands of years ago. I praise God and surrender. I say despite what I want or think I need, your will is my will. You will be done Lord, and I am going to obey. Amen.

    I have also the same feeling. But as I go back to my experiences which may seem so hard, I always tell to my self, everything comes for a reason. God is always fair and good to us. I don’t want to be hypocrite but I also envy the achievements that my friends enjoy and always comparing myself to them, asking why…why…why…But I don’t want to worry no more. I don’t want to worry about the delay of my success compared to others because construction of a palace takes more time than an ordinary building. Let’s pray to our Father to take away all this negative feelings and surrender to God. To God be the glory. Amen

    Dear Kayla,

    Xanthe’s Mom and Leil were the first ones to leave you comments, and I agree with them that we should pray to God to help take away these negative feelings that can’t help us in our current situation. I also agree with them how hard this really is, but it’s harder to move and seek a solution to our problems while carrying this heavy burden in our hearts.

    I must admit that there were times I felt like that, too. Who wouldn’t after seeing all the injustice and unfairness in the world? Even Jeremiah, a great prophet questioned God about this:

    “Lord, if I argued my case with you, you would prove to be right. Yet I must question you about matters of justice. Why are the wicked so prosperous? Why do dishonest people succeed?”

    I’m not saying that the people we become envious with are wicked, but this is the general feeling we feel, that somehow, there is injustice because God is being good to others (even evil people!), and not good to us.

    But the fact remains that only God knows everything. What do we truly know? Do we know the real situation of other people? Do we know the pain and fear they are hiding beneath their masks of happiness and strength? In my article WHY IS MY CROSS HEAVIER, I mentioned how we don’t really know the burden people are carrying within.

    “People may appear happy on the outside, but they may actually be crying terribly within. However well-off they appear to be, secret hurts may just be tearing them apart.

    Never ever believe instantly the external strengths you see, the smiles that greet your eyes. For sometimes beneath those smiles are tears, and beneath that strength is a yearning to break out and to be understood.”

    I also mentioned that in equal proportion to the weight of our cross, God also gives us the strength to carry it! If God brings us to it, He will bring us through it.

    Psalm 37 says:
    Don’t be worried on account of the wicked;
    don’t be jealous of those who do wrong.
    They will soon disappear like grass that dries up;
    they will die like plants that wither.
    Trust in the Lord and do good;
    live in the land and be safe.
    Seek your happiness in the Lord,
    and he will give you your heart’s desire.

    God’s blessings don’t always come in the form of material things. God values our soul and character more, so that sometimes, the material blessings are delayed until we have gained the strength God desires us to possess, in that way, we become better persons not only materially, but spiritually.

    A well respected author once said that to have money or riches without wisdom is TOXIC. It can kill relationships and break people apart. In times when we don’t see the answer yet, God may just be preparing us, letting us grow and acquire the wisdom we need so we can handle the riches He will bestow upon us in the future.

    I pray for you now. I know God has a plan for you, trust in Him! He will never let you down. 🙂

    ” To whom can the holy God be compared?
    Is there anyone else like him?
    Look up at the sky!
    Who created the stars you see?
    The one who leads them out like an army,
    he knows how many there are
    and calls each one by name!
    His power is so great
    not one of them is ever missing!

    Israel, why then do you complain
    that the Lord doesn’t know your troubles
    or care if you suffer injustice?
    Don’t you know? Haven’t you heard?
    The Lord is the everlasting God;
    he created all the world.
    He never grows tired or weary.
    No one understands his thoughts.
    He strengthens those who are weak and tired.
    Even those who are young grow weak;
    young people can fall exhausted.
    But those who trust in the Lord for help
    will find their strength renewed.
    They will rise on wings like eagles;
    they will run and not get weary;
    they will walk and not grow weak.
    -ISAIAH 40

    Praying For You,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    dear joyce, i am always into troubles thats so had for to solve. if its not about losing my job then, its something thats going make me go back to sept one. in one way or the other, it always involves money. i live in kuwait for 3yrs now. i got 2 good jobs and lost both. all that i had worked for has vanished. i had to renew my visa just to start a new life but the little money i have to do that also have been taken away from me and the visa has expired too. each day i have pay a panalty of $3 and half. the only option i now is go back to ghana where i’m from, meanwhile, i dont even have any money left on me to buy my air-ticket. but i thing i dont really understand about my life is that any time i get close to a friend, i am been screwed and anytime i trust a friend i’m being sturbed in the back. could u pls help me out through prayer for I eat ashes instead of my food. My tears run down into my drink because of your anger and wrath. For you have picked me up and thrown me out. My life passes as swiftly as the evening shadows. I am withering like grass. But you, O LORD, will rule forever as the bibble say. thanks in advance. bless you.

    Dear Gideon,

    I pray for you now. I know that even if you can’t feel God’s hand yet, He is there, holding you and carrying you through. I know also that you have faith in Him, and that faith is being strengthened now as you face such difficult times. Remember that tough times don’t last, but tough people do. And you’re a tough one I believe. 😉

    Times like these, let’s take a pause and seek God’s quiet presence. We need His presence for our strength to be renewed, for our peace to be restored in the midst of all the storm around us. I urge you to read LET STILLNESS BE YOUR FIRST STEP TO HEALING. And may the peace of God which surpasses all understanding be with you from this moment forward!

    Kind Regards,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    dear joyce and other readers,

    i was just browsing in the web searching for some inspirational blogs to read and i saw this website.

    i am so depress right now, i don’t really know what to do.
    i am a sophomore college student taking up a course of bs electronics and communications engineering, i only take this course because it is what my aunt wants me to take, my aunt is the one who spends for my education, i already said to her that i’m having a hard time studying because i’m not good in math and i’m not interested in my studies, but she didn’t listen. my parents don’t seem to care, they don’t even know what i’m going through because we are a broken family. i am really having a tough time now, my grades are falling and i don’t wan that. i always procrastinate. what should i do? please reply. i need some advice.

    Dear Jalyn,

    Did you know that I also studied a course I didn’t really like? 😉 I took that course because I had to take the scholarship, and I needed the scholarship because we didn’t have enough money.

    I can understand how tough it must be. Even in my 2nd year in college, I still wanted to shift course, though I wasn’t able to. It was only after years of working that I started to have the resources and the courage I needed to pursue what I really wanted to do, which is to write.

    So don’t give up! It’s not the end of everything. You can still do something with your life and turn it around into something you’ve always dreamed of!

    Right now, I guess you have two choices. One is to continue studying the course you don’t like, then get a job that could pay you enough in order to study again. The other one is to get a part-time job or a scholarship that could help you pay for your own education so you can take the course you really want! If I had the courage then, I would have taken the second option. 🙂

    But before you make any major decisions, promise me that you will pray about it first! God often has another way of turning things around, ways we could never have thought about. Be blessed, Jalyn and keep in touch. You’re never alone.

    P.S. You may also want to read an article I’ve written about The 5 Real Dangers of Being in the Wrong Career just so you’d know how to face the decision you’re going to make in the future.

    With Love,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    dear joyce

    hi i wanted to know how can i pray.. im 21 years old i beenn with the father of my 3 boys sents i was 15. we moved from nc to my home town ri and everything was good we went back to nc to vist family and friends.. when we got back to ri he left his facebook open and i seen this letter from a girl he was seeing her while we were in nc together.. I kick him out and two days later he is with someother girl and it hurts.. he dont come to see his boys and its like i have to be on him to see them.. when he do come by he brings his new girlfriend around and he makes sure i know they are together what should i do

    Dear Kimora,

    Hello, Kimora! Thank you for writing to us. Before anything else, I’d like to tell you how much God loves you and your kids. He has loved you since you were in your mother’s womb and has never stopped loving and caring for you.

    Kimora, I know that God will help you find a way to provide for your family and to raise your kids. Even if we can’t see it yet, He will send you angels to show you the way, people who will support you and give you the assurance and company you need.

    I want you to see yourself as God sees you: someone who is unique, beautiful and strong, someone trustworthy enough to raise the kids He has given you. You deserve to be loved and to be respected. You deserve to be treated well.

    I urge you to have a quiet time with God today, even without saying a word. Just savor the stillness of His presence and receive all the love He sends your way. Forget your worries for a while, and remember who you are in God’s eyes. You have given so much already, it’s time to replenish your strength. It’s time to receive assistance from your Heavenly Father.

    Allow yourself to get used to receiving love and care and respect. Allow yourself to be healed from your hurts. And give yourself time and space away from all of those who hurt you, including the father of your children.

    Your children are counting on you, Kimora. They will need you to be as strong and as whole as you can be. You can only pass on to them what you have, and the best thing to pass on to them is the gift of love and self respect.
    Continue in your courage, Kimora. After your prayer and quiet time with God, I know He will provide you with the strength, wisdom and boldness to stand up for you decision, a decision that will be best not only for your kids, but for you, for you are God’s beloved child as well. Be blessed!

    With Love,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Dear Joyce..

    Today, the only money i have in my wallet is 200.00 (two hundred pesos).. I am in the office right now and i could not focus on my work because i am worrying about the next day and the othe days to come.. My children need money for school tomorrow but how can i provide if the only money i have is not even enough for today.. Joyce, please pray for me, that God shower his blessing for me and my family today. At times likes this, i find it hard to believe and trust God’s promises and it is so hard to be still in this situation, Now i can feel fears and anxieties eating me again.. I really don’t know what to do now.. All i know i can do is write to YOU..

    I am a single mom to 4 children.. Marella

    Dear Marella,

    Thank you for sharing your concerns, Marella. I know you’re a brave woman, someone who would do anything for her family. God loves you and sees the good work you’re doing. You don’t have just P200.00 right now, you have all of God’s wealth available for you! 😉

    I don’t know how God is going to send you the answer to your prayers, for God indeed works in mysterious ways. All that we can do is to trust and believe that there will be a way even if there seems to be no way. Miracles still happen today, you know. Miracles happen when we BELIEVE. How do we believe? We learn to believe when we have enough love to desire faith. And you have much love for your children, I’m certain about it.

    Let us not see our problems as situations which God cannot resolve or as something BIGGER than GOD Himself! The bigger our problem is, the greater also is the grace available to us. Like Peter, we can even walk above the waters of the sea, if only we could focus on Jesus, not on the big waves coming our way.

    I have previously posted a video about worry and how God can address our problems, I hope you can watch it at this link http://itakeoffthemask.com/words-of-wisdom/why-worry-a-video-by-andy-stanley/

    God acts JUST IN TIME, at the 11th hour. So let us not give up!

    I pray for you right now, I pray with you in faith, believing in God’s power, believing in how God loves you and will never let you down. I pray for the solution to your urgent concerns, and I pray also for the long-term answer to your prayers.

    Later, when your current need has already been addressed, you may want to check out my book SUCCED IN YOUR DREAM JOB NOW. It will help you find a better way to earn money for your family. However, do note that it will NOT give you a QUICK-FIX or instant solution to your money problems. But it will lead you into a strategic and realistic path in trainsitioning towards the job that could better support your dreams for your family and yourself. God bless you!

    Yours In Prayer,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    dear joyce
    i have been with my bf for 2yrs now. he broke up 2 months back but there was no sounding reason why. it was because he was angry.we still love each other but he is so proud to ask me back and i cant too coz he is the one that broke up with me. please pray for me coz at times i feel desparate and useless. we really had many plans together and they all vanished within a twitch of an eye. please pray for him to lose that pride

    Hi Angie,
    We can make our plans, but the Lord determines our steps.. remember this verse?
    You know Angie when I was younger, I had all sorts of plans for my life. And it seems that especially when you’re young, people always seem to be asking the question: “Where do you see yourself in five years . . . in ten?” Yeah, I always had a answer for that. I had plans. I had goals and dreams. But they ended up not being His plans for me after all.

    “We can make our plans, but the Lord determines our steps.” Proverbs 16:9
    “‘For I know the plans I have for you,’ says the Lord. ‘They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.'” Jeremiah 29:11
    “‘For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,’ declares the Lord. ‘As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.'” Isaiah 55:8-9
    ” . . . being confident of this, that He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.” Philippians 1:6

    Angie, I know that what the Lord has planned for you is infinitely better than anything you could dream up on your own. I also know that where you are now is a better place in many ways. Sometimes we may feel like a failure in life and paths, but remember that faithfulness to Him is never failure, no matter how the world might see it..

    DEDICATE your TIME and ENERGY NOT to your EX BOYFRIEND who had hurt you but to the ONE who love you more than anyone else in this world.. I tell you, it will be more SATISFYING!!

    Dear Angie,

    I hope you’re doing well today. I agree with Blessie, that the Lord has His own plans for us, and His plans are always the best! 😉 I’m certain that if this plan includes a life with your current boyfriend, you need not worry because His plan will prevail.

    I pray for you now, that God may grant you your heart’s deepest and truest desires. I pray for your boyfriend that he may be enlightened in the path he should take in order to achieve true happiness.

    Anger subsides sooner or later. If love is really there, love will prevail. Love never fails. God bless you!

    Kind Regards,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    I dont know where to start I dont know what to do. No matter how hard I try it get worse. WHEN WILL I GET A break. Still I have no job everyday im looking, I have no money and plenty of bills and a son to care for. My relationship may aas well be over because he left me. I feel so alone. I try not to give up for the sake of my son but im so hanging by the last thread i constanley pray and i have tried to change my wways but i have a hinderance. I am emotionally broken and tired. I give my problems to God but I dont know its like he is ignoring me. Father please hear me out bless me and give me the strength i have been going thru for so long help!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Jesus please hear my cry. Let this end now I want to smile I want to be happy I want to provide for me and my son.
    I want my love life to be better but he turned his back and I feel God is doing the same

    Hi Candice! Hey, put your worries aside ok..
    In times of deepest despair, when all others avenues appear to have failed, the one source of rescue that would always work was to turn to God, the maker of heaven and earth, for whom nothing is impossible.
    And so dear Angie , in your own time of trouble, despite all of your own efforts, when you are tired of the struggle, and when you are weary from the fight, lift your own eyes to the hills and seek the glory of God Almighty to come to your aid.

    God will not fail you.

    May God look down upon you today and strengthen you in your troubles.

    Candice,
    Life is full of challenges not only for you but for everybody and it really is not easy especially that you have a son to take care of. My advice to you is “never give up” because God will never give up on you. When you wake in the morning, simply say…”I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me”. Repeat it over and over again every morning. After the storm, tears, pains, hurts are expected. But think of the son you have. It’s not fair for him if you neglect him. Make your self super busy as it helps take your mind off him. Start a homebase business to support yourself. Be strong for your son and soak your self in prayers. Ask everyone you know who are prayerful to pray for you. Believe me, this works and you will be amaze how quicky you will recover. Good luck and God bless to you and your son. Please take care.

    Dear Candice,

    God loves you. Already, there have been two angels who have replied to you even as I’m just beginning to reply to your message.

    Your son is a wonderful gift, and you have him with you as a real angel to always bless your day with his presence. 😉 Know that when God gives us a gift, He also gives us a means to take care of it. Even if you see no way today, He will see you through.

    Forget the people who do not have the capacity for now to love you. There are others who can support you and give you more. Let go of the little that you have, and you will receive what God truly wants you to enjoy.

    Your concerns are real, but there are things that are far more valuable than our present worries. Life is one, health is another. Each day that we wake up and have another opportunity to see our loved ones is a precious gift that no amount of money could ever buy.

    You are far richer than you think. Yours is a multitude of opportunities just waiting to arrive, and for you to see. I pray that God may open your eyes to see them and to catch them so that you may be blessed the more, especially your beloved son. Let’s keep on hoping. Sometimes it is darkest in moments when the sun is just about to shine. 😉

    Praying For You,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Thank you for your advice. I appreciate it a lot. Right now, I’m just trusting God where He would lead me. And I know everything happens for a reason. Thank You! 🙂

    by the way, writing is my passion too, and the course i really wanna take is anything as long as it is related to literature. Godbless!

    My husbnad recently left me. Moved out while I was at work. We had been having problems for awhile. I still love him but he is happy now. I live in a big home by myself, which he picked out. I hate it here. i have no friends, relatives to talk to. My parents are deceased and I am not close to my family. i feel like ending it all. Can you help me?

    Hi Cora, do not depend on people for your happiness.. yes people (family, friends, relatives) can bring a great deal of happiness but most often than not, those people we expect would makes us truly happy are the same people who cause us misery and loneliness..
    Yes your husband is happy NOW, but we don’t know if it will stay thay way for long.. Just continue praying for your marriage and give all your worries to the Lord.. Before him, admit that you are powerless over this problem and you will see how HE will act..

    You will be in my prayers..

    Sorry to hear that your husband has left you. For whatever reason it was, what is important now is the now, the present, and how you can move on from here. I’m sure you still loved him but he is not all that and in time, all your pain will heal. First, top and foremost, trust in God. Secondly, spend time to have a little love for yourself by doing some makeover. Yes, pamper yourself because you need it and deserve it. Third, keep yourself busy as in b u s y, and start building up new friendships and try to restore the old ones you had. If ever there will be another guy to love again, remember to not give your 100%. Always leave some for your self. Lastly, think of the bad times you had with him and not the good times. You don’t deserve that he left you, therefore he doesnt deserve to be remembered…at all. Good luck and may God be with you always in your most difficult time.

    Dear Cora,

    Thank you for writing Cora. This is not the end, but just the beginning. If you hang on and trust God’s power, it may be the real start of a more beautiful and meaningful life for you. Sometimes, bad things happen before they turn out for the better. But we can’t reach that better end if we don’t wait for it, so let us not give up. 😉

    If you don’t like it there, maybe you could make arrangements to move to a better place you’d like. It doesn’t have to be as big, you may even feel more cozy and comfortable in a cozy place. Is there a way that you could move back closer to your family? If that’s not possible for now, maybe you could make new friends. Join a book club or see meetups of people with similar interests. Maybe you could also rent an apartment where you could share a room with someone who has a cheery spirit, that could help lift up your mood. 🙂

    The goal now is just to stay afloat. Don’t think too much of the BIG future, or of all the confusions of the past. Just think of the moment and you will have more serenity. When I’m confused, I often seek a quiet place. Many times, a church atmosphere helps. Just hearing the choir sing brings me to another place, a place of hope and possibilities.

    The world is larger than the life you’ve always known. If you can, start traveling and trying out new experiences. Be like a child again. A child doesn’t have much, but she has a lot of hope and a lot of things to look forward to.

    God loves His beloved child and will always see her through. God bless you!

    With Love,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Hello.. I just stumbled on this, and I have to share my pain. Its an inexplicable one, and iv felt like this for nearly 4years!. I married a man who left me, cheated on me, and hit me when we dated!. Nd he came back and begged, and I took him back. His family never liked me, and unfortunately in africa that’s everything. Today, 8months after marriage, the tears haven’t stopped, he never keeps our problems between us, always telling his family and friends everything that happens with us, beats me, and somehow I’m supposed to take it all!. In africa, a woman is expected to endure cheating, battery and wicked inlaws!. That’s how she’s a real woman!. But God knows I can’t take it again. I know God hates divorce, but I’m done. As iwrite this, its 5.30am, I haven’t slept all through the night, and this is the usual practice for me. I’m back in my father’s house for now, and in nigeria that’s a big shame!, but I’m willing to take the shame. The pain is UNBELIEVABLE!. People never know what you go through. Life isn’t always about money and wealth!. I could do well with a poor man!. I’m in so much pain, I’m begining to believe God doesn’t love me at all!… Please help!

    You are a brave woman, and there is no shame in that! I admire you for having the courage to stand up for yourself and for what you believe in. Even if there are many people who condemn you, it doesn’t mean that they are right. Consider only how God sees you, and God loves you so much He sent His only Son to die for you. God condemns not but forgives us and died for us so we can live a brand new life! God bless you.

    With Love,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Dear Joyce,

    I have been with my guy friend for almost 1 1/2 yr. When, I met him while i was still with my bf but we had problems so we broke-up. I started seeing and talking to my friend. We had this very special connection since the beginning. Then a fews months later I found out he was talking to his ex I got upset but later we continue talking. Just a few months ago i got a call from his gf saying that they had never left each other. That all this time they were still together. He knows the family and will spend the holidays with them. I was heartbroken so we stop talking and his gf left him too. A few weeks later I forgive him he say he sorry that he made a mistake and so on. So we continue our relationship. I would notice his gf will text him once in a while. till recently i found out they are going on trip together. I ask about the trip and he say he was still missing his flight but he’s lying cause he already purchased the tickets for them two. Im really heartbroken. I love him so much that I can’t pictured my life without him. We just had this very special relationship we bound and we always have a great time. Please advice Im going crazy without him.

    Dear Julissa,

    Thank you for sharing this. I know that whatever I might say would sound easier than it really seems. But however difficult it may be, we have to do the right thing so that even if we experience tremendous pain at the moment, we’d have a chance for a better and happier life in the future.

    I believe that you really need some space and time away from your man. This would help not only you, but him as well, so that he may have the appropriate time to reflect what really matters most to him. He should be able to determine whom it is he really loves, and not continue going back and forth between his relationship with you and your ex. The best thing for him is to have some time alone and not use anybody to comfort him in the meantime.

    He should be able to learn how it is to really commit, or else, he will not have a truly meaningful relationship in his life. Whenever the relationship becomes uncomfortable, he will just resort to another relationship because he knows he can always go back to certain people. Don’t let him suffer this meanigless kind of relationship. If you really love the man, you’ve got to teach him what love really is all about.

    I know you can do this, however hard it may be. Press on for the higher goal, for that thing which can both benefit you best. Do take care and may you find the strength to love yourself more each day. This is the greatest gift we can gift to those we love the most!

    Kind Regards,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    I will like to be receiving periodic messages from your end. Thank you for being there all the time. May God continue to strengthen you

    Dear Julius,

    Thank you for that. You can subscribe to the weekly Newsletter at the sidebar so you can receive weekly inspirational articles from I TAKE OFF THE MASK! 😉

    Kind Regards,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Life is definately easy boy how I’ve learned….thought I was goin to catch up finally and due to ruthless scammers I’m still without a vehicle and the $2500 I got scammed out of…yea I went to the police but a scam like this is probably hard to catch them…idk atleast I’m trying. Just is a real crushing experience I’m still walking to and frm wrk everyday my niece(6yrs) whom I’ve been raising since birth and my daughter (4yr)keep me goin I know I’m truly blessed wen I see them smile they deserve soo much I want to give them the world….I just ask that we be in all your prayers that we brave this rough part of the road…I’ve always believed wen prayers go up blessings come dwn. Thanks!!!~heather

    Dear Heather,

    Thank you for writing your prayer request. Rest assured that there are people here who will be praying for you and your family. We have you in our heart and in our prayers. God bless you!

    Yours In Prayer,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Hello Joyce,

    I am a 22 year old woman. I ended a relationship about 2 years ago– one that was bad in a sense. The relationship was ulltimately great thought because God has given me revelations and the opportunity to grow, using the mistakes that I made to glorify Him. I was hurt and I am sure that I hurt my ex-boyfriend.We used our relationship for our own selfish gains. Since then, we have forgiven, have been healed and are pressing toward the mark of a higher calling.

    I never noticed until afterwards why things didn’t work out. For one, the relationship was simply not built upon God’s word and His TRUTH. It was a promiscuous relationship. I was searching for intimacy and a man’s touch and care because of my fatherless childhood. For moments my flesh was satisfied but, I still didn’t know who I was until that “romance” burned out and I got to know intimacy and true love through God. I found out that He was my REAL father and that my identity lived within Him. It took lots of forgiveness and healing for me to get through that particular season of my life. Now, I have fallen in love with my ONE TRUE LOVE. My relationship with God is stronger than it has ever been!!! I am so excited about what He is doing with my life. I made a vow to God and to myself that my body belongs to Him. I will not be intimate with another man until I am married to my husband. I have decided to live my life TOTALLY committed and “souled” (SOLD) out to Christ!

    Last year, my prayer was honestly for a husband. That longing began to take over until I went back to God and He whispered some things into my ear. God will provide me with a mate in His time. My search for a companion is over. I am reminded in God’s Word, Proverbs 18:22, “Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the LORD.”

    However, while alone reading in the coffee shop (exactly a month ago) this guy walked into my life. He introduced himself. We exchanged phone numbers. He contacted me first. He knew my stance on dating and where I am in my walk with Christ. He is saved as well and waiting (in covenant with God). We have been on a several dates. Even in public places, flesh tempts us. There is a longing for intimacy there for both of us but, we remember the promise. We will hold tight to it because the enemy knows the power of walking in covenant with God. He WILL NOT use our lives in an attempt to help corrupting yet another generation. God invented relationships. In this relationship, God will sit upon the throne!

    My concern now is that I do not necessarily know how to be in a right relationship with him. I am trusting God to continue to teach me and show me how to love him and others.

    James 1:5 says: “If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him.”

    I am trusting and I know that God will not give us a thing until He is ready for us to have it so that we know how to receive it. I ask for your prayer, Joyce, that God will continue to bless me with patience and prepare me for His blessing of a companion. I pray that God shows us His way to share intimacy. I pray and that our relationship fulfills God’s purpose and will be used to bring Glory to His Kingdom. If I am not being led by The Holy Spirit, I pray that God’s best, will find me waiting and in God’s will and that I will find Him doing the same! Thank You for your prayers!

    Dear Alaina,

    I know that God is pleased that you desire to carry out His will, especially in your relationship. Do persist in your prayers, for God does not refuse good gifts for His children, especially the gift of wisdom in doing what is right!

    Use your new-found love for each other to better reflect upon God’s wonderful love and goodness, so that you may always acknowledge Him in all that you do. There is indeed a time for everything, and everything becomes truly beautiful in God’s own time, so let us never grow weary in waiting.

    God bless you in your current relationship and know that both of you are in our prayers. May God use you as an example of His grace and guiding wisdom!

    Yours in Prayer,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    A wonderful article for enlightenment for both genders. Yes, it’s true, men go through the same emotions during the stage of ‘feeling’ rejected and/or abandon. (^_^)

    This is what I, personally, have learned;

    1. Don’t believe everything you think.
    2. When someone has left our life it does not mean they are a ‘bad’ person; or that you are. It simply means their part in our life’s story has ended.
    3. Every ending brings a New Beginning!

    Everything that happens to us, yes even the ‘stuff’ we think shouldn’t have, has a Blessing built into
    it.

    A deep bow in your direction Joyce.

    Dear Jalus,

    Thanks for sharing your thoughts and your support! Our readers will definitely benefit from the nuggets of wisdom you’ve personally learned. Everything that God allows to happen in our lives definitely has some blessing attached into it, if only we could have the eyes to see them. Be blessed! 😉

    Kind Regards,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Have difficulty in understanding male Boss as I am attached to this organization as PA to Boss. I did asked him is anything I can help him to follow up on administrative task. ( My initiative). The effort gone into vain.
    He kept quiet only & mumble to HR said that I do not help him at all. Indeed it really upset to be heard from Human Resource Manager.

    Dear Beverly,

    It’s really hard to work with a boss you can’t quite understand. But it’s part of this imperfect life, and sometimes, we just need to accept for the meantime those things we cannot change. It’s hard to change ourselves, and it’s harder still to change other people.

    What we can do is not to focus so much on them, but to focus on our goals. What do we really desire to achieve? Are we really happy with our present job or should we look for another that is closer to our passion? In prayer, let us ask God to help us and also to help enlighten the minds and hearts of those we work with. Be blessed!

    Kind Regards,
    JOYCE

    P.S. You may want to read the article I wrote titled 7 Reasons Why It’s Crazy Trying To Satisfy Your Boss 😉

    By Post Author

    I was in stress for more than 2 months because my girl friend got married and before going to marry she told lot of lies to me which i came to know after her marriage from others and i didnt know anything about her marriage.. Once in life she also loved me more than her and from last year we could able to meet because of her enviorment and her problems and then i caught in stress because she left me alone and got a new partner as a husband and i felt very alone and useless in this world. I am feeling so inferior and cant able to live properly . What i have to do and no aim to live and not getting anything right in my life .Everthing is going wrong with me and i am trying to be strong and want to make her realize but i cant because i cant meet her and i cant talk to her.She has gone so far.

    Dear Sourabh,

    I can understand your grief. It’s really painful to lose someone we love. But there is a time for letting go and for moving on. Now is your time to grieve, and later on, give yourself time also to recover and move on.

    The woman you love has already made her choice, and however painful it may be, you need to respect her choice. That’s how love really is, it doesn’t force anyone, it doesn’t intrude, it allows the beloved to make a choice, even if it means letting them go.

    Your life purpose may not be found in her alone, for it is in God’s hands. Seek this now, this may lead you to your true happiness. One day, you may look back and you will see that what has been painful to you now has only led you to your true purpose and happiness. Be blessed!

    Kind Regards,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    hello joyce!
    Greetings! I
    Just call me niece for short.I am 23 years old from Manila. I just need some advice i am really down at this point of my life.You know their is this person who always put me down.Whenever i achieved something she was always very mad at me.Whenever i did something good she doesn’t care but if i did something very little wrong in my work wow she was very very happy.Sad to say that she is our relative.I heard from my other family member that she is so envy with us.What so envy about us?We are not rich,ware very simple we dont have cars,we are midd class.But she is rich,powerfull,many houses,…She always put me down and my family too.I am always praying to God that someday love conquers everything.Thank you

    Dear Eunice,

    I’m glad you were able to write today, Eunice! I hope you’re doing fine. It’s a bit rainy in Manila now, isn’t it? 😉 But even if it is, I hope you don’t let the downcast weather affect you. In the same way, I hope you don’t give so much weight on what this person says if it’s just going to dishearten you and ruin your day.

    We really can’t please everybody. No matter how hard we try, and I mean HARD, there will always be people who just CAN’T appreciate the good that we do.

    What matters is that GOD is pleased with our actions and intentions. He is the One who sees everything, who notices every effort we’ve put in order to make relationships work.

    I hope there can be away to avoid interactions with this person for the meantime, especially if you’re being affected by what she says. We’re not stones, we’re human beings who could feel after all, and who get affected too, by the people around us. If you live in one household, you’d better avoid interacting with her.

    Also, even if she says something that offends you, try not to argue. Remember that whatever you say, she will still believe in the things she wants to believe in. An argument will only bring you more pain, and your conversation will only be lengthened. As such, the more you would hear the words you wouldn’t want to hear.

    The next time she says something bad, try to invoke your silence. And then say a little prayer for her. We really can’t do much to change people, but GOD CAN! So let her go in God’s hands.

    Base not your self-esteem on other people’s opinions, especially on people who don’t love you. Base it on God’s great love for you! No person can ever put us down if we won’t let them. So never put yourself down! Whatever is her opinion is just that, an opinion. It doesn’t mean she’s right!

    Do continue to strive for your dreams and to believe in yourself. God sees your efforts and will be the One to reward you for all that you do. God bless you!

    Yours In Prayer,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Hi Joyce, I’m at the lowest point in my life. I got a Dui and The love of my life left me after five years that we been together. When I need her the most she’s not here. She completely cut me off even when she knows that I need her in my life at this time. My family is stressing me out. I can’t think, eat, or sleep. I’ve been praying every day so that the lord acne give me the strength to go threw these problems eepecially a broken heart and a shattered soul. I need her family and her back in my life. I just don’t know what to do please reply back. Thank you

    Im in the same exact spot that you are in, Im
    living with a broken heart its almost unbearable but you are not alone I promise. I myself find it so hard to just even wake up in the morning and go throughout the day…it seems as if you can use this time alone to really focus on what you want in your life…make the most of this time you have to yourself…you find out the most about your soul in times of solitude

    Dear Josephine,

    Thank you for replying to Emmanuel and for allowing God to use you as an instrument of your healing, even while you’re also in a place of grief right now.

    May God continue to bless you so that you will be able to bless more people! Keep up the faith and always seek the Love of God to strengthen you in all that you do. God bless you, Josephine!

    With Love,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Dear Emmanuel,

    Rest your weary heart for a moment and let God carry you through this. Try not to think of the many days ahead. Stay only in the moment, and in this moment, feel the peace and strength of God.

    “The thought of my pain, my homelessness, is bitter poison. I think of it constantly, and my spirit is depressed. Yet hope returns when I remember this one thing: The Lord’s unfailing love and mercy still continue, fresh as the morning, as sure as the sunrise. The Lord is all I have, and so in him I put my hope.” – Lamentations 3: 19-24

    It takes time to heal our deepest wounds, but trust the Healer who will never fail you. Let us lift up to Him our broken hearts, our despair and our hopelessness, but let us not be discouraged when we cannot see immediately the solution we’re waiting for.

    God knows the best solution for our problems. He loves you best and wants only what could bring you lasting love and happiness. Continue to trust and never give up! Be blessed.

    Yours In Prayer,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    im at a lose of words.i justtt really need prayer I need Jesus to hold me because im falling to my knees before him, pouring my heart out and im just sooooo completly and utterly Broken, shattered, and crushed.

    Dear Kimberly,

    God loves you. Continue pouring out your heart to Him for He will never fail you.

    “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” – Psalm 34:18

    I pray for you now, and I believe with all my heart how God is also reaching out to you. There is healing in the silence of His presence. Let go of your tears and trust everything to God. Be blessed!

    Yours In Prayer,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    I don’t know why I’m doing this Joyce because i don’t even believe in the lord at all really or if I do I don’t bother much with him because despite it all there does not seem to be that much he can do about any of the problems people experince.

    My brother died in January of this year of a drugs overdose he was 37. He was a criminal all his life and a bad person who spent his entire adult life in and out of prison and in some ways you could describe him as evil he was thouroughly corrupt and if hell exists he was going there without a get out of jail free card don’t pass go Jocelyn.

    It hurt like hell I’ve never experinced grief like that and it still hurts 7 months on I think about him every single day and I can’t stop thinking about him and how much I loved him despite all the bad stuff and the fact that when he was alive we never got along and were not friends.

    We both had a kinship though because we went through the same abuse together from a drunken bullying father (how am I meant to like a God called the father when I hate my own ?) and all our lives experinced deprivation and high unemployment.

    No matter what the middle class people say once your exposed it becomes very difficult to end the cycle of boredom, unemployement and despertaiotn that we both felt marked by.

    Were is God Jocelyn what is he going to do about this ?

    Sit on his fat godly ass Jocelyn that’s what as that’s what he seems to always do in life ?

    Dear Phil,

    I guess there are as many perceptions of God as there are people, and the FAT one you just saw is Someone who was made to wait that long before He could actually be allowed to move and work in our lives. 😉

    That God was just there, like an empty and dusty room we have no use of, somewhere we don’t want to go to, and many times, can’t really believe if it still exists at all. Yeah, that room means nothing to us, and it seemed so boring that we’d rather spend our days in the kitchen eating something interesting or in the entertainment area where we can play our drums and sing our heart out til we fall exhausted of all our woes.

    The truth remains however, that this room still exists whether we believe it or not. And maybe, when we get tired of all the other rooms, when we get tired of all the noise and useless chatter, we may begin to seek it for some moments of quiet, even if it means just rebelling from the world we hate, or from our own selves.

    You have already peeked in that room, Phil. When you felt that LOVE for your brother, you’ve already glanced a bit about the room you have forgotten for so long. If you have time today, why don’t you enter that room for a while? After all, what have you got to lose? You can always shut it close again, even lock it up forever! It won’t follow you around and intrude upon your life like some nosy and irritating people who have no respect for us do.

    You can do something you’ve never done before, Phil. And you might just find out something you never even believed to exist!

    Kind Regards,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Waaoh! U’r such an angel Joyce. Was so down n browsed thru 2 find an uprifting, n in ua site I got more of what i xpected. May God continue using u. What ur giving pple here is more than silver n gold. God is using u 2 bring bck hope 2 his pple. He’s using u 2 remind them that He cares. May the same God, our Jehovah, xpand ua territory. God bless u.

    Dear Grace,

    Thank you for wishing me well! 😉 It’s really refreshing to hear comments such as yours, it gives me more strength and inspiration to carry on with what I do. By God’s grace, may more people be blessed indeed!

    Kind Regards,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Hello God Bless,
    I’ve been serving God for about 5 years now. All these years I’ve had my share of ups and downs. My flaws are too visible for me to try to hide them and right now I no longer feel the same way as I did when I first came to God. I understand we have to go through things to move in different spiritual levels but I have so much build inside of me that I feel I can’t go on no more. I was always number one to say I’ll help if they needed help on anything and everything. I did it from the heart (I loved doing it) but now I find myself not wanting too anymore. The pain, hurt and anger has build inside of me so strong. Something I know it’s not right. I don’t want to feel like this. I’m tired of feeling used, feeling less, feeling lonely,feeling out of control of life. I’m not happy with my life. Now I know the enemy is always out there to get us and put negative things in our minds. I’ve been praying for this for a very long time I’ve even giving up a lot of the things I want and desire. So God can have space to do what he wants but he doesn’t. I feel like he is not listening although I know when he doesn’t speak is because he is working. I feel alone even though I know that I’m not and somehow he is carrying me. I feel broken even though I know I need to get broken more because I don’t want to feel like I feel no more. I want to be happy and laugh and smile at things just because I know God is real. Even if everything around me is falling down. Why have I not received my blessing. I’ve been praying, crying for it. I’m Gods daughter I shouldn’t have to feel like this. I believe I deserve to feel that complete peace and wholeness everyone says they feel. I want to experience it myself. I don’t want anyone else to tell me about it. Then it makes me wonder if I’ll ever feel complete wholeness and peace.

    Dear Marangelie,

    God’s Grace be with you! Thank you for writing and for sharing how you feel right now. God is pleased with all our efforts to help other people, things you’ve done for so long a time now. 🙂

    However, there also comes a time when we get exhausted, when we could give nothing more, and that’s alright, too. God knows the limits of our strength. He also knows how hard we’ve tried all these years.

    Maybe all that God wants you to do right now is to REST in Him. You’ve always been concerned about other people, that somewhere along the way, you forgot how it felt for someone else to be concerned of you, too. God is concerned, and He wants to refill your strength and to bring back whatever was lost.

    It is not always with the flesh that we can accomplish things. The Spirit has more power to do what we can never do. But we have to ALLOW God to work in our lives, and that means that we have to stop working even for a while. We have to start allowing God to love us, to pamper us, to make us feel we’re not alone.

    Seek Him today in the stillness and sweetness of His Presence where He could be found. Quiet all the noise of worry and of all the things you feel you MUST do. Acknowledge all your hurts, all your fears and all of your anger before Him and let Him do what is appropriate for them all. Peace be with you, my friend. And may the LOVE of God find you in His Presence today. 😉

    Yours In Prayer,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Lot of people whom i spoke to about God told me we need to ask God to show us His purpose for our lives – what He wants us to do and He will show us and help us to take steps toward fulfilling it.

    You know Jocelyn, it has been many years since i asked God what plans He has for me. I’ve told Him a lot of times too that His will be done in my life.. I am not a lazy person Jocelyn, since i can not be lazy because i have children who depends on me. I’ve worked so hard all my life, i’ve prayed so hard all my life too. I want to also believe that I am a kind person and i would not want to hurt anyone willfully.. BUT look at me now, after many years of seeking His purpose in my life, after so many years of working hard, after many years of praying hard and after sooooo many years of trying to be kind with other people.. here i am.. no permanent job, no security in life, no money, no best friend or friends atleast.. Why Jocelyn? Now, will you tell me to pray harder? Seek Him more? Is He really that elusive to people who needs Him? Is He playing favorites? My only question is WHY??

    Kim
    35 years old/ single mom/no permanent work/struggling everyday in life/and so on…

    Dear Kim,

    I am certain that God recognizes all the hardwork that you did. He loves you and has always watched over you through all these years.

    I can relate to how hard it is to seek God’s purposes for our lives, I’ve struggled with it for many years. All the while, I believed I truly wanted to seek His will. It was only later on that I realized I really wasn’t. What I wanted was some kind of Power who will accomplish MY WILL and all the things I wanted to see happening in my life.

    I’ve realized that seeking God is like seeking a partner in life whom we want to marry and love just for the sake of loving him, not for anything else. Oftentimes however, when we seek God, we seek Him for other things, and we become like women who seek partners for their money or their status in society, or for the stability they could give our lives.

    It is true that God has the power to give us everything else, but even if He did give us such things, if we do not learn to receive Him in our hearts, and to fully cherish His love, then we’d never really be happy and all will be in vain. The people and things we seek for, even if they be given to us today, will someday leave us. Things will rot. People, no matter how kind they seem to be, are still imperfect and are bound to disappoint us only in the end.

    Only God can fully satisfy us.

    I am 36 years old, and I have recently lost my bestfriend whom I thought would be there for me for life. I am still single, with no husband to support me and give me the kind of love other women my age naturally receive. I have resigned from a stable job in 2009 and have been relying solely in God’s providence for me from then on. I also have no children who could inspire me and give me their cute little smiles and warm little hugs each morning so I could have the energy and the love to make it through the day.

    I look up to no other but God, and He has not failed me. God is more than enough to fill the emptiness in our hearts if we would only let Him fill it with Himself.

    Never give up, Kim. Leave all else behind and you will see the One who alone can make you happy. He is the One you’ve been searching for all along 😉

    With Love and Prayers,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Thanks for your advice Joyce.. Someday, when i write you again i promise i will be writing of how God has blessed my life and how fruitful my journey was..
    Thank you for creating such a beautiful place of comfort.I pray that God will continue to bless your site and that He continue to use you to touch and enlighten so many wandering souls out there.

    Love and prayers,
    Kim

    My ex-boyfriend and I had our much long awaited closure last night. We haven’t spoken for more than a year. I felt that last night was the right time for us to thresh out all the pains and hurts. We both asked forgiveness from one another and the closure finally happened.
    The problem is I feel so hurt now and I hate myself for not being loved anymore by this person. I feel so bad at the moment. But I am fighting hard to overcome the pain. please help me.

    Dear Marianne,

    Many times, even if we knew we did the right thing, we still can’t help but feel the pain, for we have loved after all. We have given our hearts to another person, and now it’s time to let that person go. There’s always something painful about goodbyes. We feel that we are parting not only from a certain person, but from a certain part of ourselves.

    Times like these, we can only wait and trust that the pain will one day go away. It’s a process we have to go through so we can reach another phase in our lives, a new phase of growth and more joy coming our way. Let us bear this sorrow with patience and hope, trusting God will be there for us in our darkest hours. Cry when you can no longer contain the hurt , yet rest also once in a while so you can regain the strength to carry on. You will survive one moment at a time. Spend more days with your family and friends and fill your heart with as much love and attention from others who care for you. I know you can do it. God bless you!

    Yours In Prayer,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Dear Joyce,
    Thank you for the response. I felt so lost after the closure. I really didn’t know if I did the right thing of letting of a relationship that didn’t work anymore. I prayed to God for this closure and when I finally got it, I never expected to feel so hurt. I questioned myself if I did the right thing.
    Right now, I am hanging on the rope of faith, trusting that when I let go of something that isn’t for me, God will surely create miracles for me to see and experience. Maybe, I am just expecting them too soon. But I also realized that God wants me to learn to be more patient this time.
    Again, thank you for reaching out. It is indeed comforting that someone understands me in this great time of sadness. Please pray for me that I may fully heal from this experience and sincerely let go of my ex. God bless you more.

    From,
    Marianne

    Dear Joyce,

    I’ve recently found out that my husband has had an affair working abroad. When he came home for vacation, I confronted him. The first reaction of course was denial. After providing him the proof that I found, he told me that he didn’t love the girl but only had a relationship with her for “financial gain”, saying that she was a client of his buying gadgets from him & also that he wanted to boost his ego & see if he can still attract other women. I told him to end his affair in front of me by calling the other woman. He hesitated for a while & said that it wasn’t her fault but his. To make it easier for him, I decided to call her instead. I spoke to her in front of him. I found out that she didn’t know he was married & has a family. I told her the truth & asked her to just stay away now that she knows. After all this, my husband asked for forgiveness & another chance to make things right. I said yes of course because I love him so very much & for the sake of our children. However, now that he is back there, I have all these doubts & anger inside me. I am always sad & depressed & I’m having a hard time moving about & doing the normal routine I do as a housewife. Everytime my husband & I talk, I always end up fighting him & being miserable. My husband is very sad & I feel that he is getting frustrated with what is going on. Joyce, I am very angry & still hurting from what he did. I can’t seem to forget & truly forgive him. Yet I still very much love him & don’t want to lose him. I don’t know what to do. How & where do I start to move on. I am just so broken right now. Please help me. Thank you so much.

    Sincerely,
    Jewel

    Dear Jewel,

    I admire you for your courage to fight for your love and for your family, and for your willingness to forgive and to keep the relationship. It’s not an easy challenge that you’re going through. It will take much effort, prayers and cooperation between you and your husband to be able to restore what has been broken. It will also take time and lots of patience. The important thing is the progress that you see each day and the desire within you why you want to make this relationship work.

    If it is possible, you may want to work with a marriage counselor near your place so that both you and your husband can receive periodic counselling and monitor the development of your relationship. It is good to have a third party, someone else whose opinion you can both respect and listen to, because it’s sometimes hard if it is just between the two of you. A pastor or a priest can also do, or a common friend who knows you both.

    You should have a heart to heart talk again with your husband in order to set your expectations on your relationship. There should be a common understanding of what hurt was caused, and how you’re going to deal with the problem from day to day.

    Your husband should keep in mind that he needs to be patient with you until he is able to gain your trust again. On the other hand, you should give him more opportunities to prove himself and to regain your trust again. Know that all these will take time, and for the moment, forgiveness and patience should be the anchor of your relationship.

    I know that in all these, you might still feel that nagging feeling of betrayal and rejection. You shouldn’t deny feeling them, but you should be able to address them. In my article WHAT IS THE MEANING OF A HEARTBREAK, I’ve mentioned how we could deal with our feelings of being rejected and betrayed.

    It is said that love covers a multitude of wrongs, so it is best to be able to give more attention also to your love for each other. Try to remember what made you fall in love with each other in the first place. Take note of the good things that you see, that made your hearts skip whenever you saw each other before. Find that seed and then let it grow slowly again. Do not force it, just let it grow naturally in time.

    I wish you all the best in your relationship! When it comes to the point of becoming too painful, maybe you should give each other some space alone in order to give yourselve time to heal and recover, so that later on, you may have the time to try again. Ask always for God’s guidance and wisdom. Be blessed!

    Kind Regards,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Dear Joyce,
    I feel like im at my breaking point and am at wits end of what else to do.. You see, I recently found out the father of my baby girl cheated on me and got someone else pregnant, i spoje to him later on that day after i found out the bad news and he was very rude, arrogant, and ignorant to me, he said a lot of mean and hurtful things that i would hav never expected him to say to me and that was the last time I heard from him… I tried emailing him, no response.. tried to facebook him only to see it doesnt exist anymore and his phones been off since our argument… The unfortunate part is our daughter has been cryin for him day and night, she screams da da when we are out in public, everytime the phone rings or someone comes over she thinks its him.. The beeak up is really affecting her shes really emotional and she lashes out on me when i tell her not to do something.. i try to do my best to show her love and comfort but i dont kno what else to do… i put my all into my relationship with this man and even when i felt like giving up i hung in there for the sake of my daughter and her older sibling that her dad had prior to my relationship with him.. He even went as far as to give me an engagement r4ing but he didnt propose claiming he woyld when the time was right.. I love him wit my all and i hav been praying to God to reunite him and I once again. I would love for my baby girl to grow up in a home with mommy, daddy, and big sis.. But if thats not possible, i would atleast like for him to come back around and be apart of his baby girls life… Please give me some advice as well as pray for my daughter and I.. Im trying to hav faith but im losing hope as the days go by ;-(

    Dear Nicole,

    Forget all the men who cannot be responsible enough for your family. The solution is not in them. It is better for your daughter to separated from him as early as now rather than for your daughter to be trapped in an endless cycle of hurt and frustration.

    Seek your answers in God alone. Allow Him to be the Provider and Husband for your family and you will never be disappointed! We cannot force people to be like God who is caring and responsible and true. We cannot even change ourselves, so it would be a lot harder to change them. And to continue seeking in them the answer to our prayers is to make them false idols that rival God in our hearts.

    I know God loves you and your family and will never let you down. You will find the answer you’re looking for once you stop looking for them in the wrong people. Be blessed!

    Yours In Prayer,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Dear Joyce,
    I must say you were rite. Yesterday, my daughters dad called and left a vmail saying he wanted to kno when he could see his daughter and he would call me back.. So he called back and I answered and agreed to let him see the baby. I was so miserable the whole time I was around him, just the sight of him disgusted me.. Awhile ago I told myself i had forgave him but once i got around him, i felt some type of way that i cant even describe… For one, he blaimed everything that happened between us on me, he fails to accept responsibility for his own actions and it jus made me angry. Then he told me he still loves me and i told him, God says to love one another so i do love him just not in the way i use to love him.. Joyce, I never thought i see the day where i wouldnt want to pursue being a family with him but I did.. He lost my trust.. And now that him and the other girl broke up he trying to come back to me and he even made threats if I be with someone else.. And everytime he tried to pick the baby up she started kickin and screaming and of course he accused my family and i of poisoning her mind which is not true.. he doesnt want to admit shes acting the way she is because he like a stranger coming in and out her life.. so after last night i told him to go to court n get a court order for visitation because im not goin to keep allowing him to pop up whenever he wants..
    I dont kno what to do, am i wrong for how im feeling?? Im goin to just continue to pray and leave it in the hands of the Lord..

    Hey Joyce I got what you were saying about god being in the other room and me being in the kitchen eating the good things to eat but why does it have to be like that why can’t god be in the kitchen ?

    I told you about how my brother Overdosed on drugs and it makes me angry thanks for replying.

    the thing now is Joyce I just got banned for life from a websit again for arguing and disrespecting a moderator it happens to me all the time Joyce.

    I’m too angry too beligerent and agressive but God does not seem to want to know people like me Joyce.

    How do I get rid of all the resentment and hurt and contempt for people and stop being an asshole Joyce it’s killing me ?

    I get very jealous of other people. I get jealous of people like you who get god and who god get’s he never seems to eant to know me I don’t think he likes me Joyce.

    It feels like I go around to gods house and he tells me he’s not coming out but then I see him later on with a good pal he slipped out the bcak door to avoid me Joyce ?

    why does god seem to not like me Joyce it’s been like this forever ?

    Thanks Joyce

    phil

    Dear Phil,

    No need to be jealous of people like me, coz in the first place, I’m not the type who is able to get God or understand Him or love Him all the time. There are times I get frustrated too, and angry and I tell Him all that! I just believe I don’t have any other choice than to come back to Him in the end, it’s that simple. If I rebel and do all the stuff that would show my anger against Him, I know that logically, I would only be destroying myself. It’s much like the story of the Prodigal Son. He got to his senses when he thought that it would be better for him to be back in his Father’s house where there is food for him to eat rather than continue starving where he was. It was not out of holiness, but out of need that He turned to God.

    Kind Regards,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Exactly Joyce he returned because he had no other choice so he wasn’t making a decision based on goodness but selfishness. His motives were not godly but his brother was more godly. They killed the fattest lamb was it or a cow I can’t remember and had a party for him and the good brother got nothing at all but ignored.

    The moral of that stroy I guess is you get your reward in heaven so don’t look for it on earth see it’s the same as the bankers and all the other greedy people they are like the prodigal son they do nothing good but they take all the rewards.

    Now how are you meant to like God when he let’s that happen ?

    Dear Philip,

    Even the other brother wasn’t Godly at all, Philip. He was bitter, and though He was always with His Father, he counted everything as duty, not as love. And that is why even if he were with his Father, he was not happy. He was not able to avail of all the blessings that were there for him. That brother was just like all of us who don’t really know God. Who expect a lot from Him but don’t really enjoy Him.

    As for the reward for goodness. There are indeed unimaginable rewards in store in heaven, but it doesn’t mean that there are none on earth. Even while here on earth, we can choose whether we live lives that commit crime or things that will not make us happy anyways, no matter how much money we get. Don’t envy those people who get away with crime. They are empty and hollow within, they find no real happiness. I’d like to share with you an article I found somewhere that says EVIL PEOPLE ARE NEVER HAPPY PEOPLE http://www.happinessandevil.com/2010/10/evil-people-are-never-happy-people.html

    If you want to dwell further on the EXISTENCE OF GOD and of HIS GOODNESS and other questions of philosophy, I highly recommend this free online version of SUMMA THEOLOGICA by ST. THOMAS. http://www.ccel.org/ccel/aquinas/summa.toc.html

    Kind Regards,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    i hope you can pray for me. for the past few years, i’ve had this overwhelming feeling of loneliness and inadequacy. i am 38 and (still) single. i have been praying to God for years for a special someone in my life. i’ve met some guys; it usually starts well and then it just falls apart or fades away. i know i should not be bitter… but i sometimes wonder if there is anything wrong with me. i know i have a lot to be thankful for. God has blessed me in my work etc but somehow, it doesn’t feel enough. i’ve lived alone and independently for years but i wish i’ve met someone i can share my life with. my feeling of loneliness etc has come to a point where i just break down thinking about it, where in the middle of work i drift off and feel depressed and sad. it has affected my sleeping and eating habits. i don’t know why i feel this urgency to meet someone. i know i should calm down and trust the Lord, but it has not been easy. i should get over my impatience etc. i hope you can pray for me.

    Dear adv,

    I often wonder why being SINGLE has often been associated with being a problem, like being a sickness that needs to be cured. It isn’t. We are not incomplete because we are single. We are whole, and that’s what God wants us to realize before giving us the partners we’re praying for. This is because when such partners arrive with this condition in our hearts, we would only be seeking all our ‘incompleteness’ in them which they cannot fill, and the relationship cannot work in that premise.

    Only God can heal us and give us completeness. Only God can help us find out the meaning of our lives.

    If we feel empty, it might be that we are not living out our purpose yet, the purpose God has planned for us from the very beginning. There is a purpose for each of us, and a meaningful life that can be lived even without a partner in life.

    The irony is that after finding out this purpose, the people who are right for us soon arrives, because we find them along the path where we’re happy and living out our passion and interests.

    Look in the mirror today and see the wonderful person God has created with all the gifts and talents meant to be shared to the world. See the person beloved by God. Be blessed!

    Yours In Prayer,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Dear joyce,
    i am 14 years old. i have a story to tell you and a problem. last year on augest 10 2010 my best friend who i considered my uncle died from cancer. a couples monthes earlie i had a dream that he was going to die. he died. when i was in the hospital. right now as it keeps getting closer to his death date i am more emotional. i dont know how to deal with it because its all my fault. i mean how can some one seriousley live with themselves for the stupid mistake they made??? i need you to give me a reason to not blame myself. because i cant stop the feeling. i have to keep pretending im okay and nothings wrong. please respond back

    Dear Chloe,

    Please don’t blame yourself. Even if you were able to dream of your uncle’s death in advance, it doesn’t mean you’re the one who caused it. For one thing, it can be pure coincidence. Or even if it was a message to prepare you for his death, you still shouldn’t blame yourself for it. Maybe it was given to prepare you in advance because God knows how much you love your bestfriend. Know that your bestfriend is in God’s good hands, and for that, we can have peace. Be blessed! 😉

    Yours In Prayer,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    i dont want anyone to feel sorry for me i just wanted to know someone to tlk to for comfort. i hate my parents so they dont help.

    Dear Joyce,
    I have been feeling really down and depressed lately. I have been married for almost 7 years, have 2 beautiful boys and a nice home. I recently quit work to be a stay at home mom and raise my sons. We are active in church and attend a bible study weekly. I just keep getting into a rut with my marriage and family life. My husband is a great guy who provides a good income and is a good father. I catch myself wondering why I feel I’m not happy anymore. I have a lot of insecurities from my childhood that I think bring out some negative thoughts. I keep thinking about divorce and living on my own but I know thats not a good thing for my kids. I feel like the problem is me not loving myself and therefore I can’t love my husband in a Godly way. Please help me before I make a wrong decision.

    Dear Melissa,

    There are times when everything seems to be ok on the outside, but we feel we have issues we need to deal with within. It’s alright to deal with them, otherwise, it would also manifest itself externally, affecting the people you love the most.

    Consider however that this is not an “EITHER THIS OR THAT” decision only. You may still be able to work it out without letting go of your family, because letting go of them for now might only make matters worse for you and add to your regrets later on.

    What you can do is to first secure the cooperation of all concerned, including your husband and your kids. Let them know how you need more time now for yourself. Who knows what they can do? You might be surprised at what they can do for you, and their acts of love may just help you get over that feeling of rut you’re in right now.

    Try to squeeze in “ME TIME” in your daily activities. Know that by loving yourself more, you also increase your ability to love others more. Even in taking care or playing with the kids, you can choose some activities you really enjoy. You can also seek the help of friends or other relatives so you can take a day off for a week. Use this time wisely and go to places you’ve never been before. Meet new people too, and you will feel a new energy filling you.

    I wish you all the best, and never forget some quiet time with God. Be blessed!

    Kind Regards,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    dear joyce,
    i am going through a very rough time, my husband for 10 years just suddenly left me and my 2 kids for a younger woman he just met in HK. my husband worked in Macau and he lost his job late June. I was in China that time and i asked him to go to HK to get a china visa to stay with me.. but when he went to HK, he met this woman and for only 2 weeks, he left us.. he told our friends he doesn’t have plans of coming back to me and that he is happy and so in love. my husband cheated on me before, and every time i will ask him to let me go. but he wouldn’t let me..he always say he doesn’t want to have a broken family.. that he is only weak to fight temptations and he loves our family and our kids so much.. so this time, i was so hurt, for such a short time, he left me without saying anything. i just got to know it from my friends and Facebook. he even posted some pictures of him and the girl.. my kids are affected already, especially my eldest, she is very close to her dad. but she saw the pictures that were posted in fb so my daughter is now angry with her dad. this made me very angry and hurt but i still feel that there is something wrong… can you really fall in love with someone that fast that you can forget about your family? i still don’t understand. I love my husband so much… i just don’t know if i can get over him and if i can move on… please help me .. please pray for me…

    Dear Whey,

    God loves you and your kids. In Him rests my certainty that you will be able to get over your husband and find a new life that relies on God’s providence and protection.

    Whenever we part ways with someone, we have so many questions in mind, and this includes your question on whether it is possible to fall in love with someone that fast. I haven’t fallen in love that fast yet, so I cannot tell whether that love is true. What I can however conclude is that your husband has fallen out of love already, and this happened through the years that you struggled to keep the relationship work. Finding a new relationship with another woman may just have been the way for him to finally let go of his relationship with you, something we can’t work out anymore.

    For now, we have to go on without being able to answer all our questions. But the most important thing is to survive the days ahead and to protect your children from the traumatic effects of this breakup. It has happened already, we can’t bring back the hands of time, nor can we force the relationship to still continue.

    You have to assure your children that they have no fault in this, and that whatever happens, they are loved. They shouldn’t feel guilty for this.

    It would be very difficult on your part because you’re broken and you too, need to be healed. It’s here where we have to avail of God’s help. Talk to Him and tell Him all your hurts and anguish. Ask Him to help you through, to be there for your family at this very crucial time. He never disappoints anyone who asks His help!

    Be strong, Whey. Don’t keep on looking back. Look at the present moment. Look at what you still have left, your beautiful kids! They’re God’s gift to you.

    The future is filled with suprises. And whether you believe it or not for now, you can still be happy. We don’t know the way yet, but we trust that God can make one for you. Be blessed!

    With Love,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Dear Joyce,
    I am so willing to forgive that when people do me wrong no matter what, I always accept them back into my life no matter when they choose to come back. The problem is that I have a hard time letting go of what has happened. I believe that my hard time letting go started with my father abandoning my family but whenever he came back I still let him just for him to leave again and come back over and over, even though it always hurt. Now this is happening with my friendships and my relationships. I obsess over why things went wrong and how I could make it better and everytime they want to be my friends/lovers again I let them come back into my life even though I still havent let go of the pain of what they’ve done to me. My mom thinks I have a fear of just being alone. How can I help myself to be ok with being alone?

    Dear Lola,

    It seems your problem with easily accepting back the people who hurt you is related to your fear of being alone. Deep within you, even if you said you already forgave them, you may still feel the pain of what they did to you. Deep within, something still felt unfair. However, since you’re afraid of being alone, you prefer to have them back.

    Lola, forgiving someone doens’t mean you have to automatically restore your relationship with the person. Forgiveness is to no longer seek healing from the same person who caused you pain. It’s no longer demanding anything from them. But to be able to restore a relationship means a lot more. It means a restoration of trust and of respect. It means being able to understand at what terms you’re going to continue your communication, and how you’re going to meet each other’s needs and expectations. We can forgive in an instant, but it takes a lot of time to really restore what has been lost in a relationship.

    As to our fear of being alone, I believe it is connected to our fear of living a meaningless life. Without a witness or a company who will join us and whom we can love, we fear that our life would be worthless, that there would be nothing to look forward to anymore.

    If we want to overcome this fear, we have to be secure first in God’s love. God’s love is not an abastract thing or a mere theory. And God is not a distant spirit or an impersonal force. God is personal, which means you can communicate with Him, you can ask Him questions and He will respond. He is aware of you, of all the hurts and fears going on inside of you. And He cares for you most of all.

    It doesn’t mean we should no longer have interaction with other people around us. It only means our anchor should be in God’s love. We let that love fill us until it overflows. And then we let that love overflow towards other people. Do have some quiet time with God, you will know you are never truly alone!

    Yours In Prayer,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Dear Joyce,
    I have a major problem with my life, my ex girlfriend changed my life, she was good to me and everything, she dumped me a few weeks ago, due to her friends lying to her about me..
    I am christian myself.. and so are my ex girlfriend…
    I really need her back into my life, where I can enjoy my life and with God aswell..

    Please respond back.

    Dear Danny,

    Hello Danny! Where you able to talk to your girlfriend about this? If she trusts you, she wouldn’t just believe rumors which can’t be verified. You have to be able to clear this out with her, and to atleast have the chance to explain yourself to her. If she is not willing to talk to you for now, you can write her a letter or an e-mail explaining your side.

    If you’re attending the same Church, maybe you can ask a Pastor or a senior friend who can mediate for you so you can have some time to discuss things with her. Also ask for prayer and God’s help. I’m certain He cares about your relationships.

    Remember however that our happiness depends on God alone. He is our happiness and our greatest Love. 🙂

    Yours In Prayer,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    i lost the love of my life one year ago,on aug 8 2010.he was my whole world,with out him i’am lost,we still had so many things to do,we are to grow older together.now i’am all alone.and i’am scared to be alone.i miss him so much,why did he have to die, when he left i kept his dog now i had to put her down,that was three weeks ago. now that she gone i lost everthing that was his.thank you for letting me tell you cause i still haven’t grieved yet

    debbie phelan

    Dear Debbie,

    I’m very sorry to hear that, Debbie. Thank you for sharing your story with us. You have been blessed with his love. Though it was cut short too soon, love knows no time, and exists even now as we talk about him.

    It’s so sad that even the dog he had has already left. But know that he left you more than his dog, he left you with memories of his presence and of his love.

    It’s ok to grieve. It doesn’t mean we should forget, it only means we keep what’s still worth keeping, to remember everything that has been left to us and that part of him which has now become a part of us.

    “What we have once enjoyed we can never lose. All that we love deeply becomes a part of us.”-Helen Keller

    You may want to read my article WHEN YOU GRIEVE THE LOSS OF A LOVED ONE. I’ve discussed certain steps that may help you in coping with the loss of one of the most important people in your life.

    I have also written two poems in honor of those loved ones who have already gone before us in the next life. May we always remember their love and keep their memories within our hearts.

    POEM OF ONE GRIEVING

    UNBREAKABLE THREAD

    With Love,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    dear joyce
    thank u soo much. lately i have been reading the bible and i am not so sad. thank u

    will always pray for u,
    chloe laform

    Dear Joyce,

    This is a great read. I look forward to sharing thoughts and ideas with you. Take care always and God Bless.

    Jun Leido

    Hello Joyce,

    Im 4 month preganant and I just recently found out that my boyfriend is having a child with another female next month. He states that it was a mistake and it was a one night stand. Im having a hard time to deal with it. He has told me that he will fix the situation and things will be different and really wants to be a part of our lives.

    I just need prayer and encouraging words of wisdom.

    Dear Lost Heart,

    I do pray for you right now. I pray that God would assure you during these times of distress and uncertainty. He is the Source of all our strength, and our Provider in times of need.

    May the father of your child be enlightened as well and have the wisdom and the strength to be able to meet all his responsibilities. I do not know what his real problems are, but may he be able to fix it with God’s help. He needs to be able to fix the true cause of his confusion and brokenness before he can address the concerns of other people around him. Otherwise, what he’d be doing would only be temporary and cannot be fully relied upon.

    Be not afraid for God is with you. Your safety does not depend upon the hands of men, but upon Him. May He reveal to you the best course of action to take in this situation. He knows your hurts, and He is ready to heal you if you will allow Him to.

    We can count on the best of people and they shall fall one by one. Only God suffices, only God. Be blessed!

    Yours In Prayer,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Dear Joyce

    Hello. It was nice to find that you are an angel to human beings who support them morally by your divine prayers.

    Would you like to be my friend please?

    Sincerely yours
    Anwesha

    Dear Joyce.
    Today is my 27th Birthday, but feel so alone. I’m depressed and brokenhearted. On the 2nd, my Fiance broke up with me. It’s all my fault too she left me. We’ve been together 5 magical years, have a beautiful 4 year old daughter. I’ve jus been beatin myself up over this and been so depressed over this. Family and friends tell me just to forget about her but i just can’t. I LOVE HER TOO MUCH, but it’s too late. she took my daughter and left. I’m lost and don’t know what to do. She gave me alot of chances at change. I put my X-box before my family and Friends. I just miss here terribly. I want her back. please, gimme some advice on what to do. I’m losin my mind. Women, might be Physically weaker than men, but mentally and pschologicaly there tougher. I’m lost and could use some words of wisdon, encouragement, strength.

    Dear Charlie,

    Happy birthday! I hope you’re doing a bit better now. There are times when we really feel lonely, and times like we have lost everything. But believe me, we’re often wrong in that. You haven’t lost everything yet, Charlie. You’re still alive. You can still have a chance to correct your mistakes, to be healed of your hurts, to love, and be loved in return.

    Of course all of that would take time. But that’s your gift. You are still being given the time to do all that. You just need to be patient enough so that one day, you can finally see your dreams coming true.

    Even if your fiance has already left with your daughter, it doesn’t change the fact that you still have a daughter, and you are still his father. You haven’t lost her in this way. Things can still happen. You can still find her, ask for forgiveness and restore your relationship.

    However, before doing that, it might be better that you seek healing for your own brokenness first. Seek it in God who knows you best and who loves you most of all.

    You see Charlie, even if both you and your fiance would again start living together physically, it may not solve the problem that caused her to go in the first place. Solve that problem first, and then find them again once you have already achieved healing for yourself. Otherwise, you would only hurt each other more, and that would cause a lot of wound that would be harder and harder to heal in the future.

    Use this time to know what it is you really lack and that causes the problem between you and your partner. Be strong and never give up! If you really love them, you would give yourself this opportunity to rediscover yourself again, to be a stronger person. Only by being stronger could we be able to love our loved ones better and avoid hurting them. Wishing you all the best. May God bless you and help you find your way!

    Kind Regards,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Dear Joyce.
    Thank you for your help, i feel so lifted. I’ve come to decide to just let her go. We’ve had previous relationship issues, stuff we managed to overcome. But now, she’s serious. Sure this separation might hurt me for a while, but like you said, it’ll heal over time. I’m still young (sorta), got a future to look foward to, although don’t really know whats in store, but i’ll just give myself unto the lord and his will be done. I want to change my ways of livin, i believe that there is a Heaven and Hell and i dont want to spend an eternity of sorrow and endless pain, I want to be forgiven of what past Sins i’ve commited. I want to be ready for salvation so when my time comes, i’ll be admitted into heaven and not be shunned upon and cast into the fires.
    I’m a 27 year old Alaskan Native Male, bore to the Wonderful Parents of Margaret, and Louie Chikoyak. I dont live with my Biolocigal Father but do reside with a Step Father Named Steve whom i consider to be my DAD. Igrew up with him Since i was 5. I’ve Forgiven my Bio-dad for his past crimes he’s commited and has served time and justice for. I’ve been in jail a few times and have only turned to the Lord only in those times of hardship and depression. After i’ve been released i’ve turned my back on him and went about my ways, did what i pleased and shut him out. I’m Lost spiritually and want to find myself, do something else than stay at home and play videogames. I have no GED, jobs are hard to get around here. I want to change my ways of living. I dont know what to do though. I’m going to be hurting over this loss for a while, but it’s not going to be the end of the world. I gotta look foward and see whats going to happen, not look back at what was. I wanna change but am lost. I need guidance. I feel like dont know what to do. what to say, or pray about. I want to be found, for i feel lost. I Really want to change my ways. I’ve just recentely picked up the bible but dont really understand so phrases when it comes to certain parts. I wanna change.

    dear joyce

    i am a girl of 22 years old and i just broke up with the father of my child or i can say my 1st love. he s got another girlfriend and they now have a child together but he keep on telling me that he loves us both but the problem is he doesn’t act like he still loves me. ni ve been trying to break up with him so many times but the problem is i still love him and i feel so lonely. he keeps on hurting me over and over,now i really want to get over him. i m tired of this life and i don’t want to live like this anymore, its been three years and i m tired now.

    Dear Buyi,

    In my article HOW DO I KNOW IF HE REALLY LOVES ME?, I’ve discussed certain signs that would help us find out whether some people really love us or not. Many times, we only make ourselves believe that they do love us because it’s so painful to know that they don’t. We’re just so lonely that we often fall in love with the wrong people, people who would only hurt us instead of helping us heal our wounds. You may want to read WHY DO I ALWAYS FALL IN LOVE WITH THE WRONG PERSON.

    Maybe you need to rest your heart for a while and stop expecting the kind of love that the people around you could never give you. Pain also serves us some purpose if it alerts us that something is wrong. The reason we keep on getting hurt is that we’re expecting the wrong things from the wrong people.

    Have some quiet time for yourself. Try to see yourself as God sees you, as God loves you. Try to feel for once how much you are LOVED.

    Our love for other people should not come from the needs we expect them to fill. It should come as an outpouring of love which God has first given us. Know first that you are loved, and then let that love flow to others around you, not the other way around.

    Allow yourself to be loved, to pause for a while and to retreat from all the expectations of the world, even your own expectations for yourself. Know that even if you can’t meet all these, you’d still be loved and cherished. You don’t have to do anything else to be loved. You only have to receive it with a heart that surrenders all your hurts and frustrations to God.

    You are special. Wonderful things can still happen in your life, Buyi. But let us not filter them out by forcing such things to come only from the people we want them to come from. God bless you!

    Yours In Prayer,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Of course you’re tired sweetheart … it’s been a long road and you’re only 22. I’ve been down a rough path as well and I know that it can get better, or it can go on forever. The choice is yours dear … are you ready to choose yet? When I was well and truly broken, I decided that I was going to act like a person of great worth, even if I didn’t feel worthy. The truth is, we can’t expect anyone to treat us well if we continue to believe we are unworthy. After a few months, I found that my acting had turned into belief. Be kind to yourself and make decisions as your child would wish you to make them. Remember, one day your child will come to you with questions about how you lived your life, and you want to be able to answer those questions honestly and with pride. Understand that you’re allowed to love people you can’t be with.

    That’s not the impression I got Joyce the bible never went into it in a lot of detail so I never knew if the brother that stayed was doing it out of love or duty all I know is he stuck around and helped out and done good work.

    It’s a bit harsh if anyone was to say he’s not the most deserving between the two. If however that is the true meaning of the parable then it just goes to show Joyce your damned if you do and your damned if you don’t as brother number two’s bad behaviour will be forgiven and everything forgotten.

    Brother number one would have been as well doing nothing as he won’t get any reward on earth and then if he goes to heaven they will say – you showed no love and you were bitter and he won’t get any joy there either.

    Know what I’m saying Joyce ? Thanks for the links I’ll have a look but the chances of me becoming a good christian are not very good. 🙂

    Hi Joyce-

    I’m grateful that I have found this page. I read your single mom prayer and just had to thank you. I have been a single mother for 15 years now, my son’s father was never in his life. I have raised him alone. Tim and I had many struggles along the way, even survived domestic violence. We have been traveling our journey alone, with no support whatsoever. We have reached a point in which we are giving up. I’m not very comfortable with this place because I have always been strong enough to fight the good fight. For some reason we both have grown weak, and fearful. I don’t know how to snap out of this, so I ask for your prayers.

    You see, people can be cruel and selfish. My son and I have been hurt badly and my last relationship caused so much damage that recovery has been difficult. It doesn’t help that society today, in general is filled with self-centeredness. I’m surrounded by people who are quick to ask and take, but too reluctant to offer compassion, and sincerity.

    Anyway, I’m sorry to vent this to you, was just looking for some compassionate words and maybe a little prayer.

    Thanks for reading.

    Sincerely.
    Marisa

    Dear Marissa,

    I’d like to congratulate you for being brave all these years, that’s really an achievement being able to raise your son on your own! I know that it seems as though the tough times haven’t subsided yet, but you’re a lot toughter, too. Don’t give up yet, let your love for your son give you strength.

    Let God also be the Father to your family. He will provide for you in ways you’d never even imagine. By faith, let us always believe how much He loves us. He will always provide for our needs, just in time.

    God’s blessings be with you, Marissa. If you have time, maybe you could read the Bible’s chapter about Elijah and how God provided for the needs of a widow and her son ( 1 Kings 17). I’ve just written an article on this, but it is yet to be released on September 2, so I hope you could check it out by then. 😉

    God be with you, Marissa. He knows your needs and all the efforts and courage you have exerted until now. He will never let you down!

    “And don’t be concerned about what to eat and what to drink. Don’t worry about such things…your Father already knows your needs. Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and he will give you everything you need.” – Luke 12:29-30

    Yours In Prayer,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Joyce-

    Thank you for your response. I will definitely look for your article. I will read the bible story, I am familiar with it, but how soon we forget when we are in a state of panick 🙁

    Thanks for bringing me back to my faith, I seem to have gotten lost along the way. Sometimes God sends us messages only to bring us closer to Him. I realize that now and I think he is trying to see me in church, so I will definitely visit this weekend, lol 🙂

    I want to thank you for your warm. sincere words of encourafement, it’s just what I needed. Sometimes a person just needs a little nod of acknowledgement, or a glance of recognition. These sincere gestures can carry a person a long way. I haven’t received that in a very long time until you responded to my message. You have definitely lifted my spirits, and I wanted to let you know how much I appreciate your sincerity.

    Stay blessed, Joyce and thanks again!

    Sincerely,
    Marisa

    Hi I have been crying every day now for a year exactly. I left a relationship because I felt lonely, used, and manipulated. But after a while I realized that maybe I had made a terrible mistake. However my partner has (rightfully) gone on with life and met someone else. I feel I cant breathe- cant sleep and have lost a lot of weight. I need to let go- but can’t. I have no inclination to meet anyone else and when I do I know it’s a waste of time. Please help me I feel I am losing my mind.
    Thank you

    Dear Zoey,

    Every heartbreak is painful. And the pain doesn’t mean it was wrong that you broke up with the person in the first place. It’s really hard though, and for the meantime, you have to accept the reality of the difficulties ahead, that many times, all the you can do for now is to hang on, to survive, and to believe in your heart that this too, shall pass away. It will. Believe that it will!

    I’d like to share with you two articles that might help you understand what you’re going through:

    WHAT IS THE MEANING OF A HEARTBREAK http://itakeoffthemask.com/words-of-wisdom/what-is-the-meaning-of-a-heartbreak/

    WHY DO WE ALWAYS FALL IN LOVE WITH THE WRONG PERSON http://itakeoffthemask.com/words-of-wisdom/why-do-i-always-fall-in-love-with-the-wrong-person/

    Let this time be your time for healing. It will not happen intantaneously, but if you let God guide you, He will lead you through seasons of healing that would give you direction for the days to come, and hope that things will indeed change for the better.

    Surrender all your cares and your frustrations. Try to let go of the belief that your partner is the only MEANING that you could hold on to in this life. Life is a lot bigger than your relationship. And life still goes on long after your relationship with that person has faded away.

    You are still valuable. You are still God’s beloved one. Let Him make you feel how much you’re loved! God bless you.

    Yours In Prayer,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    dear joyce,
    i hate bothering you so. but you know, im having so many issues. i went on face book and i found out my used to be best friend is going out with this guy i really have a crush on for about a year now. she new i loved him. and you now?, i have really been trying hard to get a bf or someone to love me, but it isnt happening. i hate bothering you. tonight i thought of running away or suicide. but i didnt. why do people like me ever bother falling in love. i kinda have a crush on someone but were moving again. we have been here for only 2 months. so yea people can see why im sad.

    Dear Chloe,

    I have realized some things recently. I’ve realized that we need to discover the things that are lovable in us, those things which other people would also love. We can’t convince others to love us if we aren’t convinced ourselves that we are worthy to be loved. Maybe you can start there, to get to know yourself better first. When you realize the beauty within you, I am certain that others would also take notice of that! God bless.

    KInd Regards,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    now im crying i wish other people would see that. my 16 year old sister has guys basically drooling over her. i went to the doctor today. and they had to take a 2×2 splinter out of my leg and the doc saw my but so dont tell me thats not too bad. heres another bad thing my sister who i think is a whore is constantly making fun of me and everytime i tell my mom she believes my sister and not me. so i hate life and im really finding it hard to believe in god to help me

    I’d like to ask you one question, Chloe. Whose opinion is more important to you? The opinion of your mother or sister, or the opinion of God about you?

    By Post Author

    I need prayers over my finances. I am so broke i have not paid my rent for 2 months, my kids have been sent out of school and to make matters worse i have been transfered to a town very far from them

    Dear Tom,

    God will always provide in order to fulfill His purposes. Let’s continue to await His hand, and while doing so, let us trust His wisdom which is always at work in our lives, even if we may not see the results yet. Help will arrive just in time. 🙂

    Yours In Prayer,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Hi Joyce,
    Its really good to be here at this informative page
    would like to read more, will come back again to
    this place, but unfortunately how can i follow your
    page there is now follow button, how do i do
    Keep us inform
    best regards
    Philip

    Dear Philip,

    There are 3 follow buttons at the sidebar 😉 You can follow the feed for the articles or follow me at facebook and twitter! There is also a subscription form at the sidebar so you can receive the posts in your e-mail.

    Kind Regards,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Dear Joyce,

    My ex-fiance is hurting my heart so much. We called it off because he doesn’t feel like the relationship is good right now and he said that when it feels right again he wants to get back together. I accepted what he said but told him that I didn’t want him seeing other girls since he wants to get back together eventually anyway but he said that he didnt like that idea because he would still feel tied down to me. I am really feeling insecure and I believe that he wants to talk to other women. He has never given me a reason not to trust him but at the same time I just dont understand what else there could be. We still talked everyday after our breakup but as of two weeks ago he stopped talking to me cold turkey and he has been talking to different girls on twitter and facebook and saying he wants to hang with them and how he misses talking to them and things like that and some of the girls I know he used to like because at a time we were bff’s before we got together and he liked some of them then. I don’t know what to do joyce 🙁 Everyone is saying how we’ll get back together even his mom wants us too, but she told me he is trying to play games and that I should move on for now. Should I try to reach out to him or let him go?

    Dear Lola,

    You should try to give him some space to sort out his feelings. Reaching out to him might only lead him to feel suffocated. He might also feel as though you need him more than you love him. Use some reverse psychology 😉 The more you fear losing him, the more that fear of yours will come true!

    “Let there be spaces in your togetherness.”-Kahlil Gibran

    At the same time, use this chance to spend some time with yourself. If there are things that need healing, this is the perfect time to address it! Are there some things you’re not comfortable about yourself? Are there some things about you that makes you feel unlovable? Problems in our emotions, especially in our self-esteem could greatly affect our relationships because it would make you feel insecure. When we feel insecure, we may put up a lot of demands with our partners, and we could indirectly push them away.

    We could always love ourselves more 🙂 When that happens, you won’t be the one who needs to reach out anymore. People would take notice, and they will notice the beauty in you which you first noticed in yourself.

    Try to see yourself as God sees you. Someone unique and beautiful and worthy of love!

    Yours In Prayer,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    ME AND MY DAUGHTER STAY WITH MY MOTHER, IM SO THANKFUL I HAVE HER HELP WITH MY DAUGHTER I KNOW I COULDNT DO IT BY MYSELF, BUT MY MOTHERS HOUSE IS TO SAY THE LEAST INHABITABLE, THE CEILING HAS CAVED IN, THE TOILETS BROKE, NO HOT WATER AND SHE SLEEPS IN HER CRIB THAT IS TOO SMALL FOR HER BUT CANT AFFORD A REAL BED FOR HER BUT I KNOW IT DOESNT MATTER HOW BAD I FEEL SOMEBODY HAS IT WORSE THEN ME, BUT IM TRIEN TO FIND A JOB SO I CAN SUPPORT MY DAUGHTER BUT THIS RECESSION IS TOUGH I ASK FOR PRAYERS FOR ME AND MY DAUGHTER THAT ONE DAY SHE TRULY HAS EVERYTHING SHE NEEDS THANKS FOR THE PRAYERS.

    Dear Rosalie,

    I pray for you now. I pray that God may provide everything you need, especially for your daughter! God is more than any kind of recession or economic crisis. Our hope is not in something limited or dependent upon man, but in God Himself who made all the earth and all the things that are now available for us.

    Jesus was born in a stable, not a very comfortable place too. But He was able to grow up in wisdom, influence many and even perform miracles that no king or emperor could ever do. God will be able to accomplish His purposes for us no matter how limited our current resources seem to be. 😉

    God bless you!

    Yours In Prayer,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Dear Joyce,
    Everybody says that GOD DOEZN’T MAKE MISTAKEZ. I am having a hard time believing that, I HONESTLY feel that he made a mistake with me. the way I look the life I grew up in, the secrets and lies I told and kept. If god made me to be Gay then Why I hear stories and comments saying God doesn’t like that. If I came out He would send me to hell. I just want God to love me but I don’t feel that. I don’t feel that he wantz me to be myself. I am not close to God and I know that is something that I need to work on but if I can FEEL that loves me. my life would be so much easier. what does God say about Homosexuality?

    Dear Adam,

    I cannot say that I am much closer to God than anybody in here, so I’d say you must ask God yourself, because this concern is a very personal thing between the two of you. But first, set aside any of the judgments and condemnations you heard that other people said about you. They’re not God’s opinion, and it’s unfair if we should be angry at God for something that He really didn’t say, isn’t it?

    All I am certain of is that God loves you. I can’t see how you should consider yourself a mistake. It maybe that we are not yet perfect, but that doesn’t mean we are rejected and that we cannot be loved for who we are. We just formed that conclusion based on the prejudices of the people around us.

    I will never turn away anyone who comes to me…” – John 6:37

    Now that’s a verse from the Bible, something that Jesus said so Himself. And I think that doesn’t exclude you,Adam. Try to come to Him today, He will never let you down. 🙂 Be blessed!

    If you have time, please read my poem THERE IS NO GREATER LOVE http://itakeoffthemask.com/poems/there-is-no-greater-love/ . It’s a recent poem I wrote so I won’t forget how much God loves me even if I’m not perfect, and even if I don’t meet all the expectations of other people.

    With Love,
    JOYCE

    P.S. It is not a prerequisite to God that we should FIRST be SINLESS before He could love us. God loved us while we were ALL dead with our sins, and sent Jesus Christ to save us because ALL OF US cannot save ourselves. If there be anyone in the world now who is SINLESS, let him or her cast the first stone!

    By Post Author

    Dear Joyce,
    I’m having a real tough time.I’m class 9 and this is the when i should be studying.But I just can’t study.I don’t like to study at all.In spite of the fact that I know that to earn a living for myself I have to study.I try hard to get my my to study but it just doesn’t work.Another problem is that I habe a huge crush on a guy in my campus.He is also in 9 class but in a different school.We have never met but we have chatted many times.But he never says hi to me or anything.I daily go to the park where he plays to catch a glimpse of him and then I cry because I feel I’ll never get him.
    Can you pleaseeeeee help me.
    I will keep hoping that you will help me.
    Yours lovingly,
    Bhavya

    Dear Joyce,
    I’m having a real tough time.I’m class 9 and this is the time when i should be studying.But I just can’t study.I don’t like to study at all.In spite of the fact that I know that to earn a living for myself I have to study.I try hard to get my mind to study but it just doesn’t work.Another problem is that I have a huge crush on a guy in my campus.He is also in 9 class but in a different school.We have never met but we have chatted many times.But he never says hi to me or anything.I daily go to the park where he plays to catch a glimpse of him and then I cry because I feel I’ll never get him.
    Can you pleaseeeeee help me.
    I will keep hoping that you will help me.
    Yours lovingly,
    Bhavya
    PS: The above letter is wrong read this one.Sorry !!!!!

    Dear Bhavya,

    I will pray for you that you may receive the deepest desires of your heart 😉 And before that, that you may discover what these things are, the things that could really make you happy. Don’t worry so much for now, enjoy your youth. You may fall in love and experience some heartaches, but you should always try to rise again, because life goes on. Studies may not always be enjoyable, but just focus on the good things your studies will bring you in the future. It’s for your own good. You are very lucky to be able to have the opportunity to learn and improve yourself. You can seek out study partners if you like so that study time may be more fun. Take care!

    Kind Regards,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Dear Joyce,
    I became a widow two years ago and I struggle with the new identity that I have developed. As a widow you develop into a different person to be able to adjust to your “new life”. I struggled in my marriage and with my late husband. He was an alcoholic and he died because of the drinking. All I want is happiness and for me to be able to live my life with my new (old) love. The reason I say new old love is because he was my first boyfriend when I was 13 years old and we reconnected after the death of my husband. I am very happy with him and I truly love him. I am just rambling on. I get like this from time to time. Miss my late husband but at the same time don’t miss what we went thru.

    Dear Nancy,

    I also wish you happiness, Nancy. 🙂 It might take some time before you could totally adjust to your new life, but eventually, you’d be able to enjoy it with the people you are now blessed with.

    New opportunities to begin are always a blessing in that it provides us a chance to grow and to find a better life for ourselves. Do include God also in your new life so that you may always be guided by His wisdom and His love. Be blessed!

    Yours In Prayer,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Dear Dr. Joyce.
    I’m a 24 year old college student undergoing poor self-esteem. I’ve had this problem ever since I was a little girl and every now and then, it seems to creep up on me. I am the 2nd of six kids and the first daughter. As the first daughter, I carry the weight household when my parents can’t. I have a serious habit of caring for people…even more than myself. I see this as a positive trait however, I feel empty inside. I know it’s vain to focus on self image but, I really want to feel and look beautiful. Every time I get the chance to, I use that money for somebody else (etc. boyfriend, siblings, parents, food, etc). Sometimes, I even feel guilty about the purchases I’ve already made. Is there anyway that I can treat myself without the feeling of guilt? I would really appreciate it.

    Dear Cindy,

    It’s not wrong to give to other people, but it’s also not wrong if we also learn to love ourselves. It’s not the same as being selfish. Being selfish is when you love yourself at the expense of other people.

    When we don’t treat ourselves well, there may come a time when we become so tired and drained already, and we no longer have the energy nor the love to give to others around us. Loving ourselves in the right way is also loving other people because it is by being our best that we are able to fully help other people we care about.

    You can think about it also this way. When some of your loved ones are sick or sad, you worry about them don’t you? On the other hand, when your loved ones are happy and doing well, you also feel glad. Now think about how your loved ones would feel if they see you sad or hurt. In truth, the best gift we can give to our loved ones is for them to see that we are well and that we are joyful in our lives. That joy is what we can really pass on to those we love. There’s nothing to feel guilty about that.

    Most of all, God loves you too, Cindy. Think how sad He must be whenever you fail to love yourself.

    We are all special in the eyes of God, and it would surely make Him glad if we become the best kind of person we could be! Blessings be with you, Cindy.

    With Love,
    JOYCE

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    dear joyce,
    I am in a nice relationship with a man who I’ve known for years. I have been rejected most of my adult life by boyfriends who just want to use me. This relationship I am in for almost a year and he is very good to me. My trouble is that I’m expecting to be rejected at any moment. the enemy plants thoughts in my head like ” every other boyfriend rejected you and why wouldn’t this one” this leaves me feeling a deep fear. We love each other and he states that he believes he will one day marry me. we are both in our 40’s and enjoy each other lots. How do I get rid of this nagging fear? I know GOD brought us together like this. The enemy is trying to ruin it for me by making me afraid. Your take off the mask teaching about being afraid brought this up to the front.

    Dear Rebecca,

    All the other men in your life have rejected you because you needed to meet the man who is really right for you! If any one of them have accepted you, you wouldn’t have the chance to be happy with the man God has prepared for you 😉

    Of course there would always be a risk in love, and we can never be a hundred percent sure. But if we have God with us and we allow Him to fill us with His wisdom, we can be more guided in the directions that we take. I once went out with a guy, and I prayed to God that if he wasn’t really the one for me, that God Himself may make a way to take away the guy that wasn’t meant for me. And He did! It was not a rejection, but God’s intervention.

    It is God who blesses the relationship that we have and that is why it’s good if the two of you are both close to God and guided by His presence.

    I also wrote an article HOW DO I KNOW IF HE REALLY LOVES ME? http://itakeoffthemask.com/relationships/how-do-i-know-if-he-really-loves-me/ I hope you can read it sometime.

    God bless you, Rebecca! Take care and be happy. 🙂

    Yours In Prayer,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Dear Joyce,
    I am seven months pregnant. I have a 10 year old son a 13 years old step son and a cheating boyfriend who ignores me every chance he gets. Im constantly surrounded by people and still I feel so alone. I know that I should feel joyful right now but I feel uncontrollably depressed. Im getting to the point where I hate even waking up in the morning. The only thing that keeps me going is my 10 year old son. Who is my one and only reason for living. No matter who where or what I turn to I cannot find peace within. where should I turn? what should I do? How do I beat this deppression before it beats me?

    Dear Lisa,

    If it’s really a clinical depression, I believe seeking professional help is the wisest thing to do. Do consult an expert in your locality who can help you. If he says you’re not really depressed, but merely undergoing a very tough time in your life, you should surround yourself with as many people who could support you. This includes family and friends, a religious community, or a club with a common interest to keep you busy each day and to give you something else to look forward to.

    Most of all, spend quiet time with God daily, preferably in the morning and in the evening. It may be that you’d feel nothing different at first, but stick to it, just be present, and there will come a time when you will be able to enter the Presence of God Himself. Just lay down to Him all your concerns, hurts and frustrations. Do not filter out what you should say, for He knows what’s in your heart anyway. Be honest to Him, even if it means being angry and disappointed. Know that Someone is listening, someone who truly cares.

    The world is often bigger than the way we see it. It’s way bigger than the people who have disappointed us and rejected us. There are so many people on earth, it’s funny at times because we often base the way we see the rest of the world by the way we saw a few disappointing people in our lives.

    If everything seemed so bad in the past,if things are already at their worst, it couldn’t help but get better. This may just be the time when you can start again with a better life, a life God has meant you to have all along. 🙂 God bless you!

    Yours In Prayer,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Dear Joyce,
    I’ve experienced many many heartbreaks in my first real relationship. I’ve been cheated on, lied to, and hurt greatly. I’ve learned to forgive the mistakes of the past and give a second chance. My boyfriend left for college and told me he needed a break…the first week of school isn’t even over. I’m a mess. I know he truly cared about me, but it seems as if college life and parties, fats, and new girls have got him thinking his life is now complete. Please help with advice as I no longer respond to anything he may try to send me. I need prayer for a strong heart and a big smile, I don’t want tears and pain any longer. Advice.?

    Dear Mary,

    It’s good that you have learned to forgive the people who have hurt you in the past. But we should also remember that forgiving other people and re-establishing a relationship with them are two very different things. In order to restore a relationship, there should be a clear understanding of your expectations of one another. If you have hurt each other in the past, it must be clear why it happened, and how it can be avoided in the future. There should also be a firm foundation of trust and respect, as well as open communication, and both must be willing to put effort in order to make the relationship work.

    You shouldn’t feel afraid even if your boyfriend asked for a break. Give him the space he needs so he can realize for himself how much you really matter to him. Going after him will only make him think you are less valuable than he thought and that you’re the only one who needs him back.

    If ever he doesn’t come back, then God might just be saving you from lots of hurts and headaches you’d be experiencing with this person later on. God wants to give you someone who can truly love you and take care of you. God bless!

    Yours In Prayer,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Dear Joyce,

    With all these natural disasters happening, I am finding it hard to tell if I have accepted God and if he accepted me.
    I am 13 and I know I shouldnt really be thinking about the rapsure or anything but I am just afraid I won’t be taken with him.
    I feel like I really do accept him but I don’t go to church normally and I didn’t read a lot of the bible but I do pray to him a lot.
    Is there a way I would know if he has accepted me?

    Kenzie<3

    Dear Kenzie,

    Here is a sure message from Jesus from the Bible:

    “I will never turn away anyone who comes to me…” – John 6:37

    I truly believe this includes you! 😉 There is only one thing that God asks of us, and that is to believe in how much He really loves us. All that is required of you is to ACCEPT that love, isn’t it wonderful? God bless you and be with you always.

    Kind Regards,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Dear Joyce,

    12 years ago I fell in love at first sight with a man who prior to me meeting him had gone through and conquered various personal problems.

    Over the years I have become deeply in love with him to have him after all these years show nothing but comtempt for me. Why, I do not know seeing that the last time I physically saw him was the being of this year.

    He is always verbally mean to me over the phone and become easily bored with me. Tonight he hung up on me which is something new.

    I am tired of trying to figure out what I did or said so wrong to him that has him acting this way toward me (even though in my heart I know I have done nothing or said nothing wrong).

    Also, he has become fixated on young teenage girls even though he is in his middle 50’s which creeps me out.

    Before this we had great chemistry and communications.

    What do you think the problem is? And why can’t he just say he no longer wants to be with me instead of making me feel as if I am the one who has done something wrong (I have been totally faithful and thought I had finally found the one whom I would spend the rest of my life with).

    Please Pray that I get over this great hurt and disappointment as I will be praying for the same.

    Thank you.

    Claudia

    Dear Claudia,

    Yes, I do pray for you now. There are so many things we cannot understand for now, so let us entrust everything upon God who knows all things and who loves us so much.

    Sometimes, the best thing we can do for someone we love is to give them the space to grow and to be healed from whatever is causing them pain. We don’t know the extent of your partner’s problems, but it is only he who can address this on his own. If his behavior is already causing you harm, you also have a right to be protected and to get healed. Ask God and He will never give up on you! I know for certain, because He is never giving up on me.

    Also, if you could research a bit about BORDERLINE PERSONALITY over the internet, you may learn something about people who tend to push away the people whom they needed the most. I am not a psychologist, so I cannot do a consultation for you on this matter, and even the person concerned must voluntarily be willing to be diagnosed if he wants to know his true condition. All that we can do is to understand why some things had to happen that way and to help ourselves recover from the pain caused by such kinds of relationships in our lives. I am not saying he is BORDERLINE, just that it could help us understand some people who act beyond our understanding. If you want, you can read a book at Amazon called STOP WALKING ON EGGSHELLS

    Most of all, this is not about him, but about you. You also deserve to be loved, supported and respected. Sometimes we fail to ask ourselves why is it that we tolerate others who abuse us and fail to support us in our own needs. Is it because we don’t think we deserve any better? Of course not! We all deserve to find the people who can love us and not act in ways that are harmful to us.

    God bless you and help you find healing and peace!

    Yours In Prayer,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Dear joyce, im 30 years old.im happily married with two kids..but my husband is working abroad..before he decided to work in middle east.he worked here in philippines for how many years.since we got married we stayed together for 11years..and now its very hard for me to adjust and live without him in my side.its hard for me to look after the kids alone.but my problem now is i’m in love with someone who happens a friend of my husband.and the wife of the guy is also a friend of my husband.

    i dont know how to let go the guy..i want to share this problem to my friends buy im afraid if they will tell my husband about my problem.but i texted already the guy that i want to stop this affair..but deep inside my heart i really dont want to end.

    i hope you can help me what to do and how to recover from this…

    Dear Lhynn,

    You said that you don’t know how to let go of that guy, which meant to say that you have already decided that it would be the right thing to do to let him go. This should be clear to you, otherwise, you would always go back and forth, not knowing if you should let him go or not. Decide first, and then seek all the support you need to stand up for your decision.

    For me, it’s important to know first if you still love your husband or you just missed him so much that you sought the company of someone else who is available in order to replace his presence. Can you still feel in your heart that you love your husband? If yes, then there may still be a chance to restore your relationship. If you need to call him back even for a short vacation just to find out, please do so if this would be able to save your marriage and your family. Talk to him and maybe have a date. Recall the time when you first fell in love. What made you fall for him in the first place?

    If ever you find in your heart that you really can’t continue living with him anymore, that doesn’t mean you can immediately continue your affair with the other guy. It only means you are letting go of a relationship that isn’t working anymore. Entering a new relationship, especially with a married man is a very different thing. Before you engage yourself in such a situation, consider all the consequences.

    Are you willing to live with all the consequences of entering a problematic relationship? This includes problems with your children, with the man’s wife, and also with their children. This also includes problems with the people that surround you and know you, and also with your own conscience. Ask yourself, Can I truly be HAPPY living with this man or is it only going to cause me more pain and rob me of my peace of mind?

    And through all these, do consult God in your prayer. I am certain He will guide you to the answer that will bring you true joy and lasting peace. Be blessed!

    Yours In Prayer,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Dear Joyce,
    It starts 33 years ago, I knew this girl in high school that drew my interest. By the time I got up the nerve to ask her out I saw her and a friend of mine holding hands and kissing. I knew and liked this guy Lee and knew that Debbie was with a good guy so I left her alone and went on. After graduating high school Debbie and I never crossed paths even though as we found out that we had visited in many of the same places.
    Jumup ahead 33 years and I found her on Facebook and we started talking, We sent messages to each onther for about a month and a half and absolutely fell in love with each other’s mind’s, thought’s, and dreams. She had been married for 24 years to a person named Stephen, her relationship with Lee had lasted 6 years and he cheated on her then married the girl he cheated on her with. Her marriage to Stephen was and is (I say this because they are not divorced) the same. Stephen has cheated on her at least 4 times that she knows of, the last being while he was in the hospital having a heart valve replaced and she was taking care of him in the hospital he was on the phone one time with his then girlfriend. This resulted in her sleeping on the sofa for the next 2 years and her being so repulsed by even just is touch, but she stayed in the marriage for their 3 kids. There are other abuse’s but I will spare you of them.
    When we wrote and then met in May of 2010 she had written me many beautiful letter’s all of which said I was sent to her by God and a miracle to her from Him. I felt the same way and still do. I was married 2 times before but when I look at it the first one was for lust alone and the second I was never going to marry but she got pregnant and I did the “right thing” and made a go of it to no avail 10 years later she left me for a much younger guy.
    I realized with Debbie that she is, and still is the first woman I have loved with all my heart and all my being completely. I could state why I love her but this would take up so much room as for all the reasons I do.
    She had also stated a very deep love of me just the same, that was until July of this year as she has left me stating that she thinks her husband has changed and then also stating some very weak reasons she don’t love me “in that way” anymore. I believe many of those are just her self justifications for leaving me to not make her feel bad. Just before she left I had sat down with her and asked her to tell me how she thought our relationship was doing and if there was anything I was doing that she might like to see changed in our relationship. To this she answered “no” everything was fine and she was still very much “in love” with me.
    This was only a month before she left.
    I am now very heart broken over her leaving and her excuses are about my children and their treatment of me, and other non big problems of which are very mis understood by her as she never asked me or tried to get my true intentions of what she mis-understood. Ex. as she was coming out of the grocery store one day she had picked up a medication and was taking it so I asked her what it was. I did this because when I had met her she was taking 2 different anti- depression meds and also angxiety meds on top of sleeping pills.
    All of these she did not use anymore after we met but slowly some of them made there way back into her life. The reason I asked what she was taking that day when she left the grocery store was I was not feeling I was her “peace and comfort” any longer and just wanted to know what I was not doing for that she had to turn to meds again. She of course took this as I was being controlling and wanted to just know what she was taking.
    Any way I miss her and still love her so very much the kind of love I have only felt once in my life for someone cause I do love her from the strands of each hair on her head to the tips of her toes.
    I have major pain in my heart and it has been ripped out and stomped on by someone who’s personality I would have never expected to end our relationship this way without sitting down and discussing any concerns. I find it very hard to let go of her and am very afraid I will never trust or find the common grounds such as our history and sharing of ideals, to give my heart to this fully ever again.
    Thanks for letting me spout my hurt.

    Dennis

    P.S I can go on with so much more but I tried to condense this as best I could.

    Dear Dennis,

    Thank you for sharing your story with us. I hope that unloading many of your hurts and experiences have somehow helped to alleviate the pain you’re feeling in your heart.

    Debbie is lucky to have someone like you who loves her and really cares for her deeply. There are times however, when we can’t fully understand even those whom we love, and whom we thought we already knew so well. We can only respect their decision and pray that God may indeed guide them towards the right path where they can find true happiness.

    I hope that you too, may find your joy. It may seem so unlikely for now, but I believe in possibilities beyond our current understanding. Though you have loved Debbie so much, God has not made you powerless to find your own happiness. If it cannot be realized through Debbie, God can certainly find other ways by which to bless our lives.

    God bless you always and may you first find your comfort in Him who will always be there for you.

    Yours In Prayer,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    dear joyce…wat must i do if the guy i love the most leave me n the reason is for me 2 focus in stdying….but the problem is he date another women n im so broken hearted wit dat…..he can understand my feeling…he often angry me if im crying bout him seeing other gurl n calling with other girl till midnite…..but sometimes he will be supergood 2 me n buy me clothes….take me n bring me watch movie n many other things…..

    Dear Darlene,

    I really think that truthfulness is one of the most important things we should have in a relationship. Based on what you said, I can’t see this being consistently practiced by the guy you mentioned. Even if there are times he’s been good to you, you can never really tell his intentions or for how long he will treat you that way. In the long run, you may feel more and more uncertain of his feelings for you. You may also become insecure and afraid of losing him because you were never really certain of what you are to him. Do consider looking for other guys who could express clearly their intentions for you and who can love you with more consistency. You can also read my article HOW DO I KNOW IF HE REALLY LOVES ME? http://itakeoffthemask.com/relationships/how-do-i-know-if-he-really-loves-me/

    Take care!

    Kind Regards,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Dearest Joyce,

    As I see from other pleas of help and much need for prayer I am not alone in my own similar situation. I love my husband, I always have and always will, I know I am not perfect in anyway and have continuously made mistakes. But the one may I promised my life to has abandoned me and our child. This is not the first time either. I have yet to understand fully his reason. I pray for clarity, for patience and understanding and consolation. But, my days are excruciatingly long and empty, I pray that God finds him, protects him wherever he goes but I can’t help but wonder are my prayers in vain? Yes I want nothing more than my husband to come home so that we can resolve our issues the right way but I know this is not going to happen. I dont want to wish ill will, its not within me and not my place, but nor do I want to pray for something that is never to come. Please pray for us all, that he finds himself, his happiness, his priority, and the same for me, and that our child doesn’t suffer for our mistakes.

    Dear Melody,

    I pray for you now. Difficult times such as these leave us with mixed emotions, we may feel lonely and angry and hopeful at the same time. We feel guilty wishing someone ill, but we also feel hurt, and we don’t know what to pray for. I believe in times like this, let us just pray for God’s will to happen in our lives, because it is always the best for all concerned, even your child. Fear not for God is with you. He will provide for you according to His wisdom and His grace. Do not give up, be brave for your child! I believe you can get through this one difficult day at a time. Our solution is not with men, but with God.

    Yours In Prayer,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Dear Joyce,

    I was 16 when I fell in love with this guy. At first, he wanted somebody else. But I also felt that he had also the same feelings with me. So without having long time courtship, we became together as a couple. Though at some point I feel that I was only an “option” or a “second choice”, we were so happy that we already wanted to be married. It was then that I feel what a true love means. But when we went to college, everything else turned out so different. He had his own bunch of friends and I felt that he was slowly changing and he was not the guy that I used to love. We’ve been separated then.

    After 2 years, I was already 18 then, I admit that I still love him so I made an effort for us to become closer again. But I felt that he was so angry at me and he didn’t really want to talk to me. One day, I confessed that I still love him, and asked if he also still loved me. He didn’t say “no” or “I don’t love you anymore”. All he said was “what do you think” and told me that the reason why he was trying to push me away was that he would never be friends with his ex’s. Since then, he cut all ways for us to communicate. And I said to myself that it was time for me to move forward.

    After six months, (now, I am already 19), he came back, add me to my social networking sites and even asked for my cellphone number from a friend. I was so hopeful and happy because he made an effort for us to be closer. But then, he also tries to date some girls, and now, I feel that he is trying to push me away from him again. And I really don’t know what to do. Whenever I try to move on, he will come back, and when I’m starting to fall for him again, he will push me away. I also knew from other friends that he didn’t had any relationship since we broke up.

    Thank you guys for giving us the chance to say our problems. Please pray that I what ever happens, I could overcome this problems and heartaches that I’m feeling for almost 3 years. Thank you very much and God bless.

    Dear V,

    I pray for you now that God may give you the strength to overcome this difficulty. Do reach out also for God’s Presence where we can find comfort from our hurts and peace from our troubles.

    As I can see it, this man is not sure of what he really wants in life, or he may have issues with intimacy. However much you may want to help him, he is the only one who can truly help himself. There are many times when we think the best way we can help a person is by being there for them. While it may be true in most cases, there are exceptions where it may be best to give others the space to heal and grow on their own. They may not have the capacity at the moment to truly give of themselves and to love another person. They may not even know how to understand and take care of themselves. What happens when we force our way into their lives is that they could only drag us along their problems and then both of you will be in trouble.

    Try to stay strong on your own for now, so that someday, when he is already ready to love, he still has you. The best gift we can offer our loved ones is ourselves, the best of us. How do you know if you’re already strong enough? When you’re already emotionally stable, and when your love for the man is greater than your need for him. It’s when your self esteem is no longer dependent upon his validation. It’s when you have found the meaning of your life and your life purpose besides having this relationship with the man you want. It’s when you’re already secure with your relationship with God, when you know that even if you get heartbroken in the future, it will not break your whole life, because your happiness does not depend upon your boyfriend anymore, but in God.

    God bless you and help you in these trying times.

    Yours In Prayer,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Dear Joyce,

    I am 31 years old. Unemployed living in Uganda. For the last year and a half i have been living with a man who is still married (although separated for three years from his wife ). He says he loves me, and in his own way i guess he does. I am not happy with the way he is treating me, i have not been happy for a while and i think i am pregnant. I want to have a baby, Even with nothing to offer a baby, if i am pregnant i want to keep my baby. I know that my partner will not support me when i need him too and i don’t want to put any pressure on him or put my child position of being a bargaining tool… He is an emotional bully , there is a lot of verbal and emotional abuse and i don’t think it is healthy for me anymore. There are times when he talks at me and i can see he hates me but knows i have nowhere to go and so he tolerates me. I have dependent my brother – he has mental issues and was on the streets in Uganda for over seven years. My partner takes care of us both financially and he is fed up with it all. He keeps pushing me to get money.( from where? )
    If i leave him i have nowhere to go with my very vulnerable brother. At the same time, all he gets here is shelter, as he is not really considered and i have to concentrate most of my efforts to keeping our provider happy. I am tired and fed up with this whole relationship. I have tried to explain to him why i am not happy instead he just see me us ungrateful. I am not allowed to compalin or demand anything from him. So if he spends the whole night out and about with this friends doing drugs and heaven knows what else, and i can’t complain about it, question him on it or even be upset by it. i am supposed to be waiting with open arms grateful for any affection he can be bothered to show in his free period.
    I am very grateful to him fro everything he has done. He has looked after me and my brother, has given us shelter and food on the table and i will always be grateful for that. I thought i loved him once and a small part of me still does, but i can no longer wait for him to look up the see my brother and myself as part of his family. To stay with him would be the same as prostitution….

    Please help find the courage to do what i know i must. He is not a bad person and he does has some good intention towards me. I pray for God to give us both guidance.

    I pray for the courage i need to leave him and take my family with me. To be able to provide for them, especially here, where we get not help from the government. We have nobody but ourselves. He is North American and has no real attachments here, so he can leave at any time…

    I have realized my false hopes and come to terms with the reality of my situation. I ask from Prayer assistance, I need to the help of God to get us through this. It is hard for me to put my faith in God when all around people are crying out to him for salvation from their hunger and poverty , in Somalia, Kenya and now northern Uganda. I feel as though i am looking a gift horse in the mouth and should indeed be more grateful for the lack of consideration my partner gives me. Unfortunate for me i am not content..

    Please help me. I know deep down that i will eventually have to go it alone, it is up to me when to get the courage and it would be better to go before being pushed but i am so afraid. Where do i star.
    I have tried to look for employment but so far i have been promised work and funding for my other project but nothing comes of it. i feel trapped.

    Please help me pray. i need to God to hear me …

    Dear Jane,

    My heart goes with you in this very difficult moment in your life. At the same time, I admire you for still hanging on and not giving up hope in finding the solution to your problems.

    It is hard to believe in God’s providence when all we see around us is poverty and trouble, but remember that it’s when the night is darkest that we can see the stars shining brightest as well. I have always believed that God can make a way where there seems to be no way, and He has proven it many times in my life. One example was when I was in a foreign country. There were always people who became channels of God’s blessings for me, people who helped even in contributing food and clothing even though they were but strangers to me. It is very possible that God can do the same for you. I also remember Mother Teresa. When God sent her to help the poor in India, she was not rich, but she always received enough money just when they needed it most. Sometimes medicine would come exactly just when somebody would need it. Let us continue to pray because I believe that God never stops being a good Father to His children.

    I know that your partner is not the only one who can help you right now. We must believe in that! And if your partner, who is verbally abusive to you and who hurts you could somehow give you good things such as as shelter for your family, then how much more could our Good and Loving God provide you with all the things you need? Always pray and may your faith bring you the answer your family needs. God bless you!

    Yours In prayer,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Hi,

    My name is caroline, I am 20 years old and 4 months pregnant. I’ve been in love with the same guy since I was 16. We have been dating on and off for 4 years, and it has gotten to a point where he has hurt me too many times. Sadly, I don’t know how t olet go, and it upsets me bc i know that that is whats best for me and my child. He won’t answer my phone calls or return them bc we got into a insignificant argument. However, in his mind he can do whatever he wants and go wherever he wants with whoever he wants without a problem bc he’s a man>>> thats his way of thinking. I’ve dealt with this for too long. I’m tired of crying alone and falling asleep from crying so much. Almost 2years ago I was pregnant also, and i lost the baby . You would think he would be there at least as a friend to help me moraly and emotionally since i was so upset and depressed. But NO, he had been dating a younger girl behind my back for more than 2 months and I found out after the whole baby situation. I broke off all contact with him bc it hurt me so much. And i thought that if he truly loved me he would look for me, but he didn’t he just went on to date that girl. I cried for 4 months straight everyday and grew so much hatred for him. I had never been so heart broken before in my life, without anyone to run to. Only god knows how i felt, how i cried, how lonely I was, while he was out partying and having the time of his life with his girlfriend. I always hated him for it bc while i stayed at home n cried myself to sleep every night i knew he was out having fun. Finally after, I started to re-cooperate and put myself together after 4 long months of crying, i decided enough was enough and i had to move on with my life. One month later he decides to look for me and talk to me and wants me back. So I stupidly give him another chance. I even gave him a month to break up with his girlfriend so he wouldnt hurt her, the way he hurt me. Well ever since then we have been arguing and fighting like cats and dogs, but we never officially broke up again. But he’s done so many things behind my back, and lies about it, even if i catch him doing it. I dont understand why i still love him, when he has hurt me too much. I feel like he enjoys hurting me and that he doesn’t care about me or how i feel. He even yells at me when I cry, which makes me more upset. I know I haven’t been perfect either, and that I hurt him once when i cheated on him more than 3 years ago. I regret every moment of it, and for months i thought that that was his revengeful way of getting back to me for cheating on him, even though he said that it was never like that. However, i always thought that was my KARMA. But i don’t think its that anymore, im starting to believe he just does it to me bc I’ve let him get away with to many lies and cheatings that he knows no matter what he does to me, i will always accept him back into my life whenever he feels like it. It shouldn’tbe like that because I kniw i deserve better. All i’ve ever done is make sure he’s ok and that i’m by his side throught the good and the bad times. I have even chose him over my family at certain points and have been criticized. Does he not see or recognize any of that from my part?? I’m just very sad, but i refuse to depress myself again bc of my baby. My baby is the only thing that makes me happy, even though no1 in my family supports me with the baby. Every1 in my family hate my boyfriend bc they say he’s no good for me, and now that i’m pregnant every1 is mad and upset with me. I even got kicked out of my house. And of course HE’s not there AGAIN to support or help me. I pray everynight that God gives me enough strength to keep moving forward and not look back. But i dont think I can ever forgive him again :'( I havent felt complete happiness in a while, bc there’s always something we fight about. I need advise from some1 who doesnt know me and only knows my life story with him briefly.

    Thank You,
    Caroline

    Try Mercy Ministries. They are SUCH a wonderful program and they have sooo many resources to help you out. I URGE you to please check them out. mercyministries.com. They’ll be a huge blessing to u and ur unborn child. i promise!!!

    Dear Caroline,

    I think there comes a time when we can truly say to ourselves ENOUGH IS ENOUGH. We’re only human beings after all, we get hurt, we need people who can really support us, especially emotionally. Let us not think that the only person we have a relationship with is the only person who can be there for us. That’s just not true.

    Let us not wait for the time when our self esteem gets so damaged that we can’t believe anymore that somebody else can really love us and take us seriously. Don’t wait for that time! Save yourself and heal your wounds right now while there is still time, not only for you, but most of all, for your baby.

    Approach God’s Presence and cling to Him! He will never let you down. He accepts us in our weakness and waits for us to take that small step towards Him so He can finally embrace us and give us all we need. You are loved. For all our hurts and frustrations, it is comforting to know that God loves us and asks for nothing in return.

    God bless you!

    Yours In Prayer,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Dear Joyce,
    I am going thru a lot of emotional pain. My sisters, my cousins, and sometimes my mother say and do things to hurt me
    My mother don’t mean to, but my sisters & cousins always purposely enjoy saying and doing things to
    hurt me. Ever since I was about three years old. All my life, they’ve hurt me, and still do. I have always tried and have been a good, obedient, considerate, and respectful sister and cousin to them.
    I know they hate me, they treat me more than bad enough to signal that they hate me. Honestly I never did anything wrong to them. I am very sensitive, but even as a child they always made fun of me, they would do things just to make me cry. It was entertaining to them.
    They are just so evil to me.
    Sometimes I wish i can take my own life. since I was like eight yrs old.

    Dear Carlene,

    I’m so sorry to hear that. It’s so painful when the ones closest to us are the ones who hurt us in the end. We can however do nothing to control their behavior, we can only control ourselves. I guess that’s what you can think about for now. What do you think could you do to avoid getting hurt? Are you old enough to earn your own money and look for your own apartment? Or do you have any other relative who can take care of you? If not yet, pray that God may give you the strength to bear it all for now until the time that you can already be independent and live a life away from them.

    On the other hand, what made you think they hate you? Is it possible that you’re only misinterpreting some of the things they say? I do believe that very few people (if there are really such) who are pure evil. What I know is that we are all imperfect. Is there any good side to the people you mentioned? Have they hurt you physically? Or have they also helped you one way or the other? Do pray and may God help you. If you have good friends, specially mature or older ones, you may ask their advice also so you can benefit from their unique point of view. Be blessed!

    Kind Regards,
    JOYCE

    P.S.
    No one can put us down unless we allow it. Whatever people may say against you, if it’s not true, you shouldn’t be affected. Don’t let it affect you! You know the truth. God knows the truth. And His opinion matters most.

    By Post Author

    My name’s Brianna, I’m 22 years old, and the mother of two beautiful kids. I’m a survivor of physical, mental, and emotional abuse by my ex of 1 year. I currently do not have my kids (no cps involved) i just wasnt in a safe place so my grandparents have my kids. I live in washington and they’re currently in texas, which i am not necessarily the happiest about. I’m staying at a domestic violence shelter and have been here since July 27th, 2011 and it is currently August 31, 2011. Its only a temporary, 30- day shelter, and i’m trying to get an extension. I have been working my butt off trying to get a job, which i accomplished, but i need a 2nd one, possibly even a 3rd so that i can get an apartment and be able to get my kids back. I started school to become an Ultrasound Technician on the 18th of August.. Among all of this, i had to get an abortion on August 2nd, and i’m facing depression because of how horrible i feel and because of the regret. I didnt want to go through with it but felt that i had to, because it would have hindered me getting my kids back, hindered me from getting a job, and it was conceived with my abusive ex. On top of everything, i just found out that i won’t really get an extension, that my status has been moved to week- by- week because the shelter has been receiving a lot of calls recently for battered women with children, so i’ve been told that at any time, i’ll be asked to leave, despite my need and despite all the progress that i’ve been making towards actually getting out on my own and being able to support myself. I’ve just barely made progress, but i’m not quite ready and now im facing being kicked out on the street because others have needs that are apparantly more than mine… Just because i dont have my kids with me, doesnt mean that im not in just as much need. Everything im doing is so that i can have a safe place for my kids to be with me… i dont know what to do… im struggling so much right now!!!! i need help! and I’ve been attending church regularly, even attending college small groups, and am currently trying to find a small group for outside of my church. But i still need help and i dont know what to do…..

    Dear Brianna,

    Thank you for sharing your concerns with us. I will pray for you, that God may help you overcome this very difficult phase in your life.

    Don’t lose hope, for all is not yet lost. You have two beautiful kids, and you can still be with them. Let them inspire you to carry on each day even though you can’t see clearly for now where you’re supposed to go. Maybe you’re just being prepared. Or maybe things are still being arranged for the better. We couldn’t really know, but we can trust that God knows what’s best for us, especially for your kids.

    It must feel so terrible missing them, but you shouldn’t rush yourself too much. Things should happen at the proper time, and the most important thing is you. There may be wounds you need to heal from, and you can make use of this time to heal. Opportunities come quickly, what’s important is that we’re prepared when they come. I wish you all the best and may you find the answer to your prayers.

    Yours In Prayer,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Dear joyce, I’m amulu, 22 years old. I’m in relationship with one guy since 5 years and he is 27 years old. We are very closed. At the beginning he was love me so much and helping a lot of money for my studies and for my family. Everyday he met me and went out somewhere and he always make me surprised with giving gift. He was treat me like his wife and if i have any problem he will b with me. About 1 year we stayed together and he is one who support for my studies. I was put his name tattoo at my chest because i love him so much and i want him until end of my life. First 2 years i was very happy but after that all changed. He start to controlled me, scolded me with bad words, fight with for no reason and bit me until blood come out. Every time he was fight with me and hurt me lot. He start to avoid me but i don’t know why. Every time i called he won’t answer my call and if i send message also he don’t want reply. One month once he will call me and talk nice, if i ask anything means he started to shout. Some people told me that he married with another girl but when i asked him, he was telling me that was not true. i don’t know which one is true. Already 1 year 8 months he never meet me up. I love him so much and i’m still waiting for him. I’m really don’t know what to do. i’m really confused. Now i’m studying Law Degree but i cant concentrate on my studies and i’m so scared that my studies will affected. What i suppose to do now? How i handle him? Please help me to overcome from this problem. I’m so worried about my future life. thank you.

    Dear Amuloo,

    There are times when we think it is us who have a problem, when in truth, we just decided to carry the burden of other people who really have big problems of their own. In this case, I believe your boyfriend has a big problem that he needs to face on his own. Meanwhile, you also have to carry on with your life and not let this affect your studies which is very important for your future.

    It will not be easy. But I believe in you, you can get through this a braver and stronger woman. Your boyfriend is not the only man who can love you. In fact, he has shown you that he doesn’t love you anymore in a way that you deserve to be loved. Love means respect and not verbally abusing someone. It means caring for the other person as much as you care about yourself.

    Be strong! This is a time of great change for you, a time when you should learn to love yourself because if you neglect yourself, there is nothing more that you can offer to people that you love. Be blessed!

    Yours In Prayer,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Dear Joyce,

    i’m 28 years old and married for almost a year. right now i am in deep pain and honestly dont know what to do but to cry my self out. i always seek for strength and courage to get me through every hour which is painstakingly goes by.

    my husband is not with me right now, he lives abroad and i’m left here alone to wait for his petition. he came here just for me and that i believe is one thing that i really appreciate and that i believe is very rare. i myself has my own past, no matter how bad it was, i tried so hard to make peace with it, i’ve forgiven those people who caused me pain and i tried hard to let go. i promised myself that before i fall in love again, i’m free with my past so that i can be truly happy with the next man that comes along. that’s what i did and i’m truly happy with him. he gives me everything and treats my like am the most important he has in this world. he promised everything and he was so kind to take charge and take responsibility of me. i really appreciate it and so grateful that i have him in my life. But my problem is that he has his own past. everytime we had a fight he always brought up the issues like ” that is exactly what my ex did to me” and he goes on so angry and blurts words which i can’t imagine someone would tell me. i admit i had mistakes too, i added my ex to my freind’s list on fb and i only meant well. i wanted my ex to see how happy i was with him but when he saw it, he went so mad and cursed me all the way telling how stupid i was and how ungrateful i was, he even wished me dead. because for him it was what his ex did to him. it was so unfair for me to be the one suffering for what his ex caused him or those people from his past. he keeps on comparing every move i make that it was exactly his ex did. my gosh! i was so shocked, i wasnt expecting such reaction. for me, i am married to him and i trust in our relationship. but he says he doesnt trust me anymore and goes on telling me that he even suspects me of having an affair here. i was so hurt, i couldnt even open my mouth to defend myself. he was so focused on his anger that he doesnt hear me out. i swallowed my pride and kept on asking for forgiveness, that am so sorry but he’s so hard as a rock. he says he doesn’t trust me anymore.. well, how can i entrust my life with someone who doesnt even trust me. that he suspects my every move as something like am cheating him and making a fool of him. i do understand his jealousy but that thing that i did doesnt warrant such words. i myself does not deserved those words because i know for my self that i did nothing wrong, i did not cheat on him, or made him a fool.

    i keep on praying that the good Lord will help me open up his mind and widen his understanding. i felt so helpless. these has been going on for so long already, but this part was the worst. he’s so mad with his past that it keeps on haunting him and i ended up paying the price for what ever pain those people from his past caused him. i felt like giving up already. how can someone so gentle be so brutal with such accusations and allegations.

    please, i just dont know how to handle this one. i made a mistake and i am truly sorry for that. he doesnt talk to me as if what i did is so unforgivable already and that as if i committed a heinous crime. i dont feel like am his wife, every time we had a fight i felt like am his enemy that he tries so hard to crush down with all his might. to inflict the pain so hard that i cant even imagine what could be more worse if i am with him. i cant get over with the things he said to me. he even mentioned the things he gave and did to me

    i am open minded person and i am no fan of getting revenge or getting so mad for so long that i made it as a career. that’s why it hurts so bad knowing that the only person i promised my life with doesnt even understand me. i tried so hard to understand him, to comfort him and to give advices that it is not healthy to be so mad for so long and we ended up fighting and he says that it’s none of my business if it is his only way of coping up. he can even stand seeing me so hurt. how come this is happening to me? i’ve been through a lot of pain but this one is different because he is already my husband.

    please help me.. i’ve got no one to talk to..

    Dear Kate,

    It must be very lonely to have no one to talk to, especially if you’re burdened with a big problem. There were times I also felt like that. I hope that somehow, this letter could reach you and make you feel you’re not alone. Most of all, remember God. He has comforted me countless times when there was no one else to comfort me.

    You know Kate, I think you’ve already done your part in trying to address your past hurts so as to not let them affect your current relationship. Your husband however, has yet to do his part. It’s not your fault that he behaves that way. Though it doesn’t mean you can’t do anything to protect yourself and avoid being wounded over again.

    Kate, though you love him very much, you have to learn to set boundaries in order to protect yourself from negative feelings that others are trying to project to you. They should own their feelings, and you should own yours. If they have burdens from the past, they should address it and be aware enough to not let it affect the people that they now love.

    It’s understandable that you want to help him, but we should be aware that many times, we are not really helping them by just allowing ourselves to be hurt and to process for them the things that they should process themselves. Sometimes, the way we can help them is by making them realize the consequences of their behavior so that they would learn to change.

    For instance, you can set a boundary and tell him that you can’t do anything if he wants to behave badly or say bad things against you, but he can’t also do anything if during those times, you would CHOOSE to stay away from his presence and not hear those words that are hurting to you. In time, he may realize that he has to change and respect other people so that he won’t lose them. This is tough love, but tough love is sometimes what we need to help the people we love most. If you want to learn more about setting boundaries in order to help both yourself and other people, you can read BOUNDARIES – When To Say Yes,How To Say No. It has helped me a lot in trying to understand when my responsibility ends for another person and how I could separate others’ hurts from mine.

    Remember, you are not alone for God is with you. God bless you, Kate!

    With Love,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Dear Joyce,

    Thank you so much. thanks for taking time to respond and i really appreciate it. you’re right and right now am learning how to apply those. i dont really like fighting, it does hurt a lot and energy draining too. i do hope someday he’ll come to realize that too.

    i just want to share my experience yesterday, right after i sent you my message, i was crying helplessly while praying to God to show me sign that everything will be alright. it was so dark in my room except the flickering light of my modem at my bedside table. i just closed my eyes while trying to cry myself to sleep. when i opened my eyes, i was surprised to see a firefly flying around inside my room. its flickering light lights up my room in such a beautiful way. that made me smile and i murmured soft prayer of thank you to the Almighty God. I think He is just reminding me that their’s always hope and light in every dark moments of our life and He’s just around listening and keeping His watch upon us.

    More power Joyce and thanks so much for lightening up my day. you’re a blessing to lots of people who needs someone to talk to. God Bless Always and keep up the good work.

    Dear Kate,

    You’re very welcome, Kate! 😉 And I’m happy to hear of your encounter with God’s Presence. Seeing a firefly in that perfect timing is really beautiful and God-sent! I remember the first time I saw fireflies, it was almost magical, I couldn’t believe what I was seeing. God can indeed use many things in mysterious ways just to comfort us and to let us know how much we are loved. God bless you, Kate, and go always with the One who loves you most!

    With Love,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Dear Joyce..
    I am very confused right now. I have a job offer from a Korean company and the manager is offering a very good salary. My present job is teaching, but i only get a very small pay. How do i know if the job is really for me? I am praying for God’s guidance, i hope He will reveal to me the answer.. my deadline for this offer is only until 12 noon today.. I really don’t know what to do.. Please i need guidance Joyce, help me, pray for me..

    Thank you and more power..
    KIm

    Dear Kim,

    There are times when God indeed sends us signs of His guidance, leading us to the path that He desires for us. But there are also times when He lets us decide and gives us the freedom to choose with the mind and wisdom He has gifted us. If you are to choose, which path would you really like to take? Which would make you really happy within? Is your present goal saving money? career advancement? new experiences? or more chances in order to continue doing the work that you’re really passionate to do? 😉

    Do persist in your prayers and believe that God always answers us with things that are best for us. There is one sign that I look for when I pray. I believe that I have chosen the right path when after choosing it, I feel peace in my heart. God bless you!

    Yours In Prayer,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Thank you Joyce! Now i think i know the answer..

    You know, sometimes i think we know the answer, it’s just that sometimes we are afraid to decide.

    Dear Joyce,
    I really am hurt, destroyed, lost, and desperate for answers and guideance. It has been a month since my fiancee’ of 6 yrs and father of my 4 yr old daughter, moved out of our home, well truth be told I actually kicked him out and asked that he move out. We had a last heated discussion and fight over my insecurities and thoughts that he was having an affair with someone (his EX and or a lady he works with) he was out of our home for 2 days and guess what yes I caught him at a local bar with one of the co-workers whom I thought he was having an affair with…. with that in mind I thought that I had made the right choice in having him move out but now that we have keeped in touch and talked a little about what went wrong I think I might have jumped the gun and reacted out of my hurt and dissapointment when I made him move out. He still continues to say that she is just a friend and I think maybe that is possible only because we still love each other deeply and we only do not reunite because he thinks I will not be able to get over it and will throw it in his face and we will be in this boat again in a matter of time. Reality is that fear for what might become out of a second chance is what is keeping us apart but its is his fear for what might be. I have prayed nearly everyday all day for guideance and signs – something as to what do I do?? God please show me, tell me…. I am so desperate for answers that all I do is pray when the thought of him comes to my mind or my heart but I cant keep going like this it is so much to deal with I just need some help, guideance, words of wisdom….etc. pulling at strings…. HELP

    Dear Fran,

    It isn’t easy to give our trust to someone for fear of getting hurt,especially when we’ve been hurt many times before. But it’s also hard to keep people away from us just because we’re afraid of giving them our trust.

    We do have to be cautious enough so as not to be fooled by people, and that is why our trust should have some sort of a BASIS which we can rely upon.

    Based on what you know about your fiance, do you have a firm basis to be certain that he has an affair with another woman? Have some reliable people and concerned friends told you about this? Or is this jealousy based from a past wound, caused by someone else who was really not trustworthy?

    Fran, aside from this, is your relationship with your fiance going fine? I mean, was he able to CONSISTENTLY demonstrate how much he loves you? Does he not hurt you physically or abuse you verbally? Does he respect you and not do things that could harm you? Has he lied to you before?

    The consistency of his character and the way he has treated you in the past and up to now may indicate whether he is telling the truth or whether he has already fallen in love with another woman.

    Do consider these things and then maybe you could talk with him again to clear things out. Be blessed!

    Yours In Prayer,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Hi Joyce ,

    I came across your article in ezine website tilted “How Do You Know What You Really Want To Do In Life?”

    I am 28yrs old and has been working in the Human Resource field since 4.5yrs as a recruiter. Frankly speaking, I am tired of being a recruiter. I dont like my job, in the sense I dont enjoy it.

    I want to take up something which I enjoy as my career. I am tired of going to office everyday half heartedly and ending up giving only 80 % to what I do. I do my job in office , but I am not able to put my 100 % to it.

    But I dont know how to explore my abilities and I dont know what should I choose as my career.I have my 8 hrs job which leaves no time for myself. I just dont want to end up my life in a job which I dont like. I have spoken to my friends and parents on this , but not able to find a solution on this. I have also tried doing a self evaluation but nothing constructive has come out.

    Pls suggest a way to find a solution on this.

    Thanks & Regards,
    Shri

    Dear Shri,

    I’m happy to know that you have undertaken the first step towards finding the career you really want, and that is, acknowledging you’re not yet 100% happy with the job you have now. And this is the first question I would like to ask you, do you have a clue as to what could be the missing 20% that could finally complete your joy? Before we are able to transition to the career we desire, we first have to define certain concepts like what happiness and success would mean for us.

    To some people, it is finding a stable job. To others, it is securing a prestigious or high-earning position. Still to others, it is finding the job that utilizes their talents or one that enables them to practice their true passion. For me however, it is a combination of many aspects, the highest is being able to find the purpose which God has planned for me to accomplish in this life.

    In order to find out, we must first of all be true to ourselves and not let the opinion of other people pressure us into thinking we should get this or that just because society measures success that way. Also, we must have a firm belief that it is possible to make that transition, otherwise, everything would prove to be futile in the end. You must be able to persist, and in my opinion, you cannot persist if you’re not really doing something you love. The difficulties you will encounter would serve as tests to help you find out if you are really determined to take the path you have chosen.

    There are various ways in which to discover the best career for you, though they could not fit in the limited space we have here. I have previously written a book SUCCEED IN YOUR DREAM JOB NOW, and in case you want to check out the outline, you can click at this link http://succeedinyourdreamjob.com/dreamjobsalespage.html

    I pray that God may guide you in this journey. Remember that God’s will for you is also the path which would make you truly happy. Be blessed!

    Kind Regards,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Dear Joyce,
    My name is Samantha and I am 26 years old, I have a job as a hotel reception. I love my job and my husband but I often face emotional pain that makes me unable to live my life happily and effectively. I notice this happen to me very often since the day I started to know how to think.I feel really bad headache,my chest pain,hard to breath, my hands shaking, feel like vomiting, it makes me feel like I am insane and ridiculous,but I just simply can’t stop them.
    I am suffering verbally abuse relationship with my husband. He is a good heart person and he takes care of me like no one can ever do,he does everything for me even though when he is tired,whatever I want,he does all the housework and never let me touch anything. I love him but I am so afraid of him when he gets mad because he continuously insults me,violent to me,he actually never hit me but he intentionally push me down the floor many times. Even though when I was pregnant, I was scared, I didn’t know what to do and I cried every single day. I was pregnant when i was 23 and my husband asked me to remove the baby, I decided to keep the baby and told him if he could not take the responsibility then we should take a break. He insulted me by saying my baby is his burden, and if I keep the baby I will be his burden too,I slapped him in the face and cried badly like a river,then he said something more: ” don’t pretend that you are so innocent,you know I don’t want a baby now because of my job, don’t you get it woman? did you get yourself pregnant?” I could not talk, I could not eat, I could not sleep, my health decreased badly until my baby died with my soul. I have no strength to keep the baby.I cried everyday and I have no one to talk to, I have no family, he is the only one I have and I don’t wana tell my problems with any of my friends. But he was there for me, when he cool down, he said sorry million times and told me he did not mean any of that, that just saying when he was mad. I decided to forgive him because I was alone and I was so scared, my health was really weak and he took care of me. That was the most painful memory that I encountered but I could never forget,whenever i remember it, its killing me, I could not breath.
    But again many times throughout the years he continuously insults me whenever we fight,I just hope he could sympathize when I feel hurt but no, he never hug me or have a little intention to comfort my mental,he would say stuffs to my face like:” why are u being such a drama queen, I am not free to hear your ridiculous pain.why are you always pretend to be serious?why are you always invented something to fight with me? if you don’t love me anymore just say, why do u have to pretend like that? I am so stupid to live with such a woman like you” what can i do, I feel real hurt, not for sudden but for because something he did that makes me feel bad. I tried to talk to him,maybe sometimes the problem is not big, but I feel hurt about it because I am a vulnerable person and I just need him to sympathize and be there for me, and everything will be alright,why does he have to be mad,but he never gets it. He always think I am crazy and try to find many reasons to show me how crazy and insane I am while I suffer the pain, which make me feel more painful. Sometimes I just feel so hurt that I want to take the sleeping pills to relax a little bit, but it never works. After each time we fight,he sorry and all be nice,be good to me again. So my question is when I feel really painful, what can I do? I just want to rest a little bit but why is it so hard?I am not pretending, the feeling is always there and I can’t do anything to get rid of it.I love him and I need him, I am pregnant again now and he is ready to have it but I cannot take his abuse anymore. I have no one in my life. He doesn’t listen to me and he doesn’t get how hurt I feel every single time. When I start talking about his attitude problem he would say it’s just my imagination. Maybe sometimes i am too sensitive and I know it but I was trying my best to change and I did feel the pain.How can I live my life normally, please help me. I feel hopeless, and trapped. I am worry about my baby, i am so afraid that my sadness will kill it again and I do not want that to happen. I need my baby to be with me. Please help me !

    Dear Samantha,

    I’m sorry because no matter how much I want to, I can’t help you. You are the only one now who can help yourself and save your baby.

    “Pain has a big role in learning life’s lessons.Sometimes we don’t even get to learn the lesson unless we remember how badly something hurt.”

    By now I just hope that the pain you’ve felt is already strong enough to empower you to move on and reclaim your life. There are two ways of dying, Samantha. One is the quick way, and one is the slow painful way. All these years, you have been choosing to die slowly and painfully. Don’t wait until there is no more life in you before you decide to take back possession of your own life.

    We can’t love another person if we have already lost ourselves and died deep within. Who will be there to love at all when that happens?

    Give yourself some space and time to heal from all these and live again. Know that in doing this, you’re actually helping three people. You are helping yourself, your baby and even your husband. Yes, you are helping him to have enough motivation to change and to be a better person. All these time that you’re allowing him to behave badly, you’re also consenting to him not growing at all, and also, not being truly happy.

    You can forgive, but forgiveness doesn’t necessarily mean the outright restoration of a relationship. To restore a relationship, you have to first fix many things, including the healing and growth of both parties. Without which, no change will occur, and in fact, things would only get worse until it becomes more and more apparent that reconciliation could no longer be possible. Time will prove when enough change has really taken place. You have to be strong not to give in to the temptation of reconciling without proof of real change. But first, achieve healing for yourself. When you could already stand for yourself and for your baby without feeling devastated and empty without a man in your life, that’s the time when you’re also ready to re-establish healthy relationships that will support all who are involved.

    Continue to pray and ask for God’s strength, He will never let you down. God bless you!

    Yours In Prayer,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Dear Joyce,

    Thank you so much for your advice,
    You are absolutely right.I think I really need time to recover myself first. I was so afraid of the feeling without him so that I just tried to forgive and forget everything.
    I really appreciate your precious time to listen to me. Knowing that there are great people like you in the world and God is there, I feel life is still meaningful now.

    God bless you !

    Samantha

    Drear Joyce Im going throw a lot of trouble ,I have no one to leasen to me I can find a job ,taking. Tlost my boyfriend , and my bills r stacking up on me ,I did a lot of bad things and said back things ,I pray I could take everything back ,I love that man and now he set in jail and when he shouldn’t be ,and can’t find a job , I’m losing everything. I need god back in my life ,I want to be happy in love again,and a job,pleaded help me ,I’m am so depressed I think about suicide,sometime please help , me friend is tony Ybarra he’s sitting in jail mad at me , probley hate ,please me , thank u or who ever leasning ,please help me ,I miss him so , we said something that hurt both of us ,ogre in a lot of pain ,in his back he cries ,I take thing to help me sleep I pray god u get this please help me again thank you ! Debra

    Dear Debra,

    Sometimes we feel confused because there are so many things going on in our head, so many problems that we can’t solve right away. We also feel so much pain inside, including anger and even fear for the uncertainty of the days to come. Times like that, we should go to God, because He is the only One who can help us find peace. Our problems may not go away at once, but once we feel that God is with us, once we know that we are not alone, we are strengthened somewhat, we begin to find healing, and then we can prepare to seek the first things that we should do.

    People fail us because so many people are also broken. We can’t expect from them anymore what we can only expect from God. But God can’t help us unless we first go to Him and allow Him to work in our lives. Let go of your burdens even for just today, Debra. Let them go and then let God guide you on what you should do next. Be blessed!

    Yours In Prayer,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Dear Joyce,

    Im hurting I hurt my boyfriend really bad I left him for someone else and began a relationship with them. I didnt realize that I was hurting him throughtout our relationship like I was not the nicest person to be around. I just found out that Iam pregnant and he is in a relationship with someone else. He says he not willing to work things out with me because I have hurt him so bad in the past by cheating on him with someone else.

    Dear Katrina,

    Is your ex the father of your baby? If he is, then it would just be appropriate to let him know because he also has a responsibility to his child. However, we cannot force him to restore his relationship with you for now. Trust is not easily earned, especially once it is already lost.

    I know that you have already learned much from the past, though you would still have to face the consequences of your actions. Whatever you do, remember that God has already forgiven us and will always be there for us. All is not yet lost. You have to be strong for your baby. Let God help you to move on and to rebuild your life. Be blessed!

    Yours In Prayer,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    dear sister joyce in christ first time visit in your site its though GOD just send you to me in the right time am heart broken and dejected. my life is in mess just lost my family and wife to a rich man.would love just prayers and words to carry on and never to go back again. please i need all support i can get am saved and i confess the risen christ.thanks for all the support i just read one encouraging script that lifted me up.

    Dear Joram,

    I am happy to hear that you are letting God help you in this very difficult moment in your life. Your troubles may not pass away quickly, but with God’s help, I am certain that you can carry on. Be patient with yourself, there will be times when the healing process may feel as painful as the original wound that has hurt you. But trust in God, He knows where He is leading you.

    I have written several articles that may help you understand some of the things you’re going through right now. I hope you take the time to read them at this link http://itakeoffthemask.com/self-help-and-healing-articles/

    God bless you and don’t give up! A better life is always waiting for those who trust and hope in God.

    Yours In Prayer,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    hi im elaine & a single mum.im finding it kinda hard right now. ino alot of people have it worse than me but in 2003 ifound out iwas pregnant wit my son & when iwas 6months pregnant my mum died bside me. my ex & father of my son basically decided he wanted nothin to do wit us. isuffered BAD post natal depression but im better the last 2years 🙂 my son is 7 now & hes my life. sometimes it gets really hard to b a single mum but if u could still pray 4me id really appriciate it

    Dear Elaine,

    I will pray for you, Elaine. I’m happy to hear how you’re able to courageously rise up from all of your difficulties. Your son must be very proud of you. Keep it up and never lose faith in the God who loves you so much. Be blessed!

    Yours In Prayer,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    hi, my name is betty i’m 23 years old and i’m a mother of a sweet 1 year old boy, i have been with his father for nine years since we were in school and until now i’m still madly in love with him and yet he makes my life miserable, he continously cheat on me and everytime i found out he beg with me not to live him and me so blind and crazy i listen to him pretending to believe that he will change at least for his son’s sake, but lately i found out that he was seeing someone else for 6 months ,he had been going to her place and sleeping with her, two times he came early in the morning after spending the night with her, but i forgave him even if i was hurting, that other girl is older than him and me and she have two children, me and that other girl met once and we talked about the situatin she told me that she’s going to stop having any contact with him, i confront my boyfriend at first he denied everything but then admit, he told me that it is over with her and that he is going to be with me because he doesn’t want me to go away with our son, i stayed once again, but yesterday i looked at his messages on his phone and i found that they are still having contact and tha words that he told her is so painful to think of, he got mad that i saw his text and he told me that he don’t want nothing to do with me anymore, he can’t live with me and that he wants to end it up with me, i know that this is too much and that you are all going to tell me to leave him, but how can i let go when i love him so much, i have a chld with him, i wish things could be easy and i could just walk right ot of his life and forget about him right away, but i can’t ..please pray for me so that i can leave him and forget him and find my happiness if it’s not with him for my son’s sake. thank you

    Dear Betty,

    You’re still so young and so many good things could still happen in your life. 🙂 Things aren’t always easy, but through great difficulties, we become stronger and better persons. Many times, we don’t know that we’re a lot braver than we thought we were. But we’ll never really know unless we try.

    All these years, maybe you have surrendered that power to the father of your child. Maybe you have allowed him to be the center of your world,to be the most important thing in your life. All your hopes, dreams and joys have become dependent upon him as you have slowly lost your own sense of joy and maybe, even your own dreams. It has thus became so hard to suddenly separate from him because it would feel as though you’re also losing everything, the whole world that has revolved around him all these years.

    But know this, that if you were able to shift your focus to him and make him the center of your world, you also have the power to take everything back, to take back that world that you have given him. You have the power to rebuild your dreams and to restore your hope.

    Things may become very very difficult for a while if you do that, but after that, things can finally get better. Compare it to the situation you’re now in with your partner where things are only becoming worse each day. It’s a downward spiral where the intensity of negative emotions will only increase as time goes by. Will you risk it that your child will have to live in this kind of atmosphere during his growing up years? Will you risk it that he could feel he is the one who is guilty for all the trouble going on around him?

    Maybe you think you will miss your partner a lot, but thinking about it again, what are the things you’re really going to miss about him? The few times that he is good and sober? The past self whom you fell in love with? Your idea of him when he finally changes? What are you going to really miss about him? The times that hurt you and degraded your self esteem? His betrayal and rejection and disrespect?

    It’s okay to feel anger towards someone or something that is causing you harm, that doesn’t make us a bad person. God loves you just as much as He loves other people. True love doesn’t consent with evil, with mistreating someone, with hurting someone. If you continue in this relationship, you will be consenting to all the hurts he is causing you. You are not really loving him because you’re not teaching him to be a better person. What you’re teaching him is that there are no consequences to his behavior and that he could do anything he wishes to do, even with the people he should love. Would you like to teach the same principle to your child?

    Only you can decide on this, Betty. I trust that you now have the courage and the wisdom to make the best decision not only for your own life, but for your child as well. Go with God, He will never let you down. Be blessed!

    Yours In Prayer,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    thank you so much for your words, i think that i need to make a decision for me and my son too, even if i love this guy i can’t sacrifice my life and soul to suffer…. thank you so much but please help me pray so that i can let go i know it’s going to be hard but it’s possible.

    Dear Betty,

    I’m happy to hear that, Betty! I know I’m talking to a woman who is willing to take responsibility for her life and for her son. God is with you already and will always be with you for as long as you accept His guidance and blessings by faith. Nothing is impossible especially if we are in the right and God will be with us. I will pray for you! Be blessed.

    Yours In Prayer,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    i could really use someone to talk to… im 43, im so in love with my soon to be wife, and i feel very lonely. we live apart, she lives with her parents and i live alone. when i leave her house for the night, i come home to an empty house.. she has 2 kids that live with her, and i have 2 that live with my ex. today i stayed home from work, just to try and work out with in my self how this is making me feel. But i still feel alone, empty. although our plans are to be married in a few months, will this feeling ever go away? do i have to suffer the loneliness until we are joined?

    Dear Chuck,

    It’s natural to feel sad when our loved one is away. It’s also a natural feeling to miss them. But even though they are away, we should also feel a certain joy in our hearts knowing that we have someone who loves us. The physical distance we have shouldn’t take away our trust that we have a relationship with someone, that they still exist, and that their feelings for us will still be there until we meet them again. This is called object constancy, the ability to be certain that objects and people still exist even if they are far away from sight temporarily. Maybe this is the time to practice deriving joy from happy memories, to savor again the good times you’ve shared with the person as though you’re reliving that moment when you’re with them. 🙂

    We should also remember that our loved ones, even if we can already be reunited with them, still cannot be with us 100% of the time. They will have other things to take care of, other people to care about. You may be a couple, but you are also unique individuals who have their own interests and goals. Those are the things we bring in and offer to the relationship, without which, we lose ourselves along the way. When we do, who would be there at all for the relationship?

    We must create a proper balance between our romantic partners and between other important things in our lives. We should have other friends whom we can talk to when our loved one is not available. That would lessen the pressure in the relationship and our expectation that our partners would be like a god for us, the center of our world, and the only one who can fill in the emptiness we feel inside. This kind of intense relationship is risky because we may confuse really loving the other person to needing them so much to rescue us from our loneliness. If we keep up with this, we either resort to controlling the other person at all costs or to compliant submission to their every wish for fear that they would leave us.

    Use this time to sort things out, to discover the joys of life again and to live a meaningful life even if it means not being with your partner yet. 🙂

    Kind Regards,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Please pray that my relationship with JESUS contiues to grow. Pray for a stronger and better relationship with my fiance

    My name is Marcey and I need some divine intervention prayers on an immigration issue which has been going on for years. Need a breakthrough to be granted immigration papers so I can apply for permanent residence papers. I am tired of having to constantly move my children around and just need some stability.
    Thanks

    dear joyce,
    Im sad. Latley im thinking about my ex. We broke up in on
    December 18 2010 but i miss her she left me because she was
    Cheating on me. I still love her. I cry myself to sleep at night. And yes im a girl. And i think she
    Loves me. I dont know what to
    Do. After she left i never
    Replaced her. As winter draws
    Near i get more emotional. My
    Mom keeps asking me whats
    Wrong but i cant tell het. I would tell my dad but he doesnt care. What should i do.

    Dear Chloe,

    It’s sad to hear that. I wish we could be spared of loving people who could never love us back. But that’s one of the many imperfections of this life, and we have to live with that truth. That sometimes, we can love a person so much without being loved in return.

    I really hope that you could talk about this with your parents. Parents are the closest that we have to people who can love us unconditionally. When we were babies, we were so helpless and could do nothing back for them, but still, they cared for us and loved us.

    I also hope that you can finally let go of her and find another person who will love you and not cheat on you. If you were in her place, I’m certain you wouldn’t cheat the person that you love. Let us not be so harsh with ourselves. Sometimes, all that we have left is our self-respect. The people who really love us would value that.

    God loves you, Chloe. Sometimes He takes away some things from us so that He could give us better things, and better people who will really love us. Pray even more and find peace, hope and acceptance in His gentle presence.

    Kind Regards,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Prayer Request:

    i have a problem with my fathers estate and the lady has taken over the estate and she is continuesly is doing curses for my family, also to the estate which she is not giving back to us. please canu prayer for my son to see a clear path to help him show and do good thing instead of bad, also to get a job.

    I lost my father two months and one day ago and I can’t seem to for give his side of the family for the way they treated me during the time of his death. I am so mad, hurt and angered.

    Dear Shirrel,

    I hope you find the way to forgiveness. It is never easy, and many times, we’d feel how others don’t really deserve our forgiveness, that what they deserve more is our anger.

    We have a right to be angry, though at certain times, we may feel so tired that we don’t want to use that right anymore. What we want is to let go of the great burden we feel inside, and only forgiveness could help us do that.

    We also have a right to feel relieved, a right to be happy. May you find that happiness and peace after you’re able to let go of those who gave you much pain.

    Yours In Prayer,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Me and My boyfriend of two years just broke up. I still love him more then ever. We got into this terrible fight and he broke us up. I know he still loves me and I want to make it work so please pray for me and him. Please pray so that I can either get over this or that he gives us another shot please.

    Dear Shannon,

    Yes I will pray for you. I pray that God may guide both of you to decide what’s best for each one. I pray that God may help you both to grow in love and in understanding of one another.

    Yours In Prayer,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    joyce,
    me and my botfriend are having a problem now.and i cant understand him..he send messages to my cousin..telling that hes going to leave me now or thinking to leave me..and worst thing is that im pregnant right now,for 6 months.and dont know what to do and what to think..im so confused and so dessperate right now..please pray for me.so,that i can survive to all of my problems..thank you

    Dear Sheng,

    I have just prayed for you. You need to be very strong right now, especially for your baby. If your boyfriend couldn’t help you anymore, try to seek help from others, from family and friends who really care about you. Most of all, seek help from God who never turns away anyone who comes to Him.

    Your fate and your happiness does not depend upon the hands of those who fail you and let you down. God has made you whole on your own, and He has given you the gift of Himself to always assist you in times when you feel you can’t make it anymore. By God’s Grace, I believe you will!

    Just hang on and keep the faith. I believe in you.

    Yours In Prayer,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Dear Joyce,
    I am a single mom, life has been a great challenge but i love God. I struggle to stay celibate until God brings my partner to me but it has been so difficult. I really need prayers. I dont have a job and financial constrains drive me to break my vows to God. Pray for me. I have an MBA but i dont have a job. God please come to my aid. I dont want to depend on men for help again. I want to provide for me and my child. I need a good job, a husband. I need God to smile at me. Its been too hard for me. I try and stay calm, i smile to the world but nobody really knows my pain. Pray for me, i believe in miracles, maybe God will hear you.

    Dear Grace,

    I admire your courage for being able to make it through these difficult times. God may just be smiling at you right now, though we can’t see it with our own eyes.

    Don’t give up now. Help may already be on the way. God sometimes answers us even before we finish praying, it’s just that we don’t see yet the results of His actions for our lives. For this, we must patiently wait, believing that our prayers have already been heard by the One who loves us most. God bless you!

    Yours In Prayer,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    hi joyce
    am a newly marride girl just 3months old and wel am happy with my hubby nd he loves me a lot but the problem is am feeling my self much more adicted towards him and nd wenever he’ll go out for work in that time i’ll so much of depressed nd stressfull and sumtimes i feel ignored by him nd sumtimes i think he shows me full of attitude and these things are fully irritating me just like tribble plz suggest me wat do? how to control my mind? how to make my relation peacefull nd how to avoide fights how to make my relation lovable?????

    Dear Sairah,

    Try not to worry too much for now. You have to believe that your partner loves you even if he’s away. Love doesn’t just vanish like that, you have to trust him and his commitment to you. 🙂

    Also, you can try to make some new friends or find old ones who can be there for you when your partner is busy. People do have their limits and can’t be there for us 100 percent of the time even if they wanted to.

    Enjoy your time alone and find some hobbies to keep you busy. Seek other things which can make you happy, your happiness after all is one thing you’d be sharing with your husband. Be blessed!

    Kind Regards,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Hi Joyce, well I come to you now because I feel so hurt. My fiance & I just broke off our relationship. I just want to feel better & not think of him anymore. He said some ugly things to me that i can’t get out of my mind. im terribly hurt. He still hasn’t picked up all of his stuff & im dreading the moment i have to see him again Please pray for me I have 2 kids & i have to be strong but i just don’t have it in me. im so sad. Please pray for me,my heart & my children. God bless my ex as well. Thank you for your time.

    Dear Maricruz,

    I pray for you now. Even if you feel you don’t have it in you to be strong, you will find that strength just when you need it as long as you let God help you all the way.

    It may take some time before you forget all the hurtful things he said, but time will indeed come for healing. People often say things they don’t really mean, things they don’t know could hurt other people so much. Sadly, we can’t take back our words nor the pain they’ve caused.

    All we could do is to protect ourselves, to cry for the moment and then to move on, because there are far more important things in life that are waiting for us. Let go and let God take care of everything else. Be blessed!

    Yours In Prayer,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Dear, Joyce, or whoever reads this.
    I’m a normal girl, I’m 15 years old. I have dreams, I have feelings, I have flaws, and I’m just doen wtih hiding behind my mask. I’m doing hiding behind a mask that kills me to have on everyday. I have imples on my face, and today someone just made fun of me because of that. I know it seems like something so small compared to everything else, but it killed me. I just wanted to break down and cry!
    What’s some adivce anyone can give me to accept who I am. I just can’t take this anymore. I just want to hide away from the world. I know that people notice, but what am I supposed to do, hide in my room all my life? And I’ve tried products, it doesn’t work. Any advice to build up my self-esteem. It kills me inside.

    -Sofia Xoxo

    Thank you

    Dear Sofia,

    I have written an article about self esteem, I hope you could read it at this link A DIFFERENT WAY TO HEAL YOUR SELF ESTEEM.

    Always remember that our worth does not depend on our outer appearance. In fact, even outer beauty is very subjective. One person may not be beautiful for someone, but to another, she may appear very attractive! What’s important is that we become secure in knowing that our worth is not measured by how other people see us. If some people look down on others just because they don’t appear attractive to them, then they’re the ones to be pitied because they have subjected themselves to the same judgement.

    Someday even those people would grow old and time will take away all that they hold valuable in their lives. What then will be left of them? They’d just feel insecure about themselves and they can even show that insecurity by criticizing and putting down other people.

    The Bible says that God created man in His own image. Is there anyone who is more beautiful than God? If God is indeed beautiful, and He created us in accordance with His likeness, wouldn’t we possess a likeness to His beauty as well? 😉

    Try to see yourself using God’s own eyes. Be blessed!

    Kind Regards,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    hi ms.joyce,
    im une and as i seach in the net about healing prayers for a broken hearted i saw ur site.i read some of ur tips to heal a broken hearted and i found it right.im sad now and broken because my boyfriend leave me and he found new 1.it hurts me so much.i feel the pain and i don’t know where to start.pls.help me.godbless and more power!

    love,
    une

    Dear Une,

    Thank you for writing and for reading my articles! I will pray for you, and I trust that you can make it through with God’s help. Just hold on each day, don’t think of the many days ahead, just the moment where you are. That moment may be painful, but God’s heart is bigger than all our pain,and He will hold you close during that moment. In time, He will absorb all that pain until they all go away and all that’s left is His love imprinted upon your own heart.

    Start by praying. Even when it’s hard, just seek a quiet place and go there whenever you feel like you want to cry. It’s ok to cry, it often helps us feel lighter.

    Know that you’re not alone. There have been many others whose hearts have also been broken bad. Even Jesus’ heart had been broken by our sins, but His wounds have healed and they provide comfort and healing for all of us who are still in pain. You can make it through this dark time. God bless you!

    Yours In Prayer,
    JOYCE

    By Post Author

    Hello Ate Jo,

    Have a blessed day to you there! I am Christine or just call me tin-tin 😀 I am 24 years old now and I have 2 years son. Now, I’m working as a secretary at Attorney Law Office.
    My story goes like this my husband and I had been married for 2 years. Before we got married I know already his vices that he is a drunkard, a change smoker person, addicted to all computer games especially online games. I thought if we got child he will run away all his vices and face his obligation being the father of our child and being husband to me (being a matured padre de pamilya). I thought I’m going to be haapy with him because for the rest of my life I’m really attached to him although he don’t have a permanent job. My husband is a 23 years old, he grew up to a broken family like me.
    Last August 2011 he and I had a little misunderstanding, every time we’ve been quarrel he always warned me that he will leaved us until we reached to the point that he make me feel that I was not important to him that every time we quarrel he will maltreated, molested and violated me and he left us. Now, he leave to his mother’s house. Everyday when I’m going to work I will bring our child to him rain or shine. He makes me feel so bad, He makes me feel so bad about my self. i built my whole world around him and he took it all away. How can he not feel guilty for what he has done? How can he be so happy now with his stupid vices and friends? But, after all what he did to me Ate Jo I already forgive him, I’ll fo everything so that our family will be complete and peace again, but I think he don’t want because he always shouted and scolded me every time I’ll talk to him or please him. Please pray and give me some advice how to handle or to solve this problem.

    Thank you! and God will bless you..

    Dear Tintin,

    Thank you for writing and for trusting us with your story.

    I’m with you in prayers as you move on and find enough strength to face a new life without the support of your husband.

    I can see that you are a responsible person. Your kids are lucky to have a mother like you. Don’t let other people dishearten you,even your husband. God loves you and believes in you,that’s the important thing. God also loves your husband,and that is why He is now giving him the chance to change and to be responsible like you. Let God therefore take charge of him. Give yourself space to grow on your own,and to see how God loves you and values you.

    It is important to forgive,but it doesn’t mean that a relationship must be restored without trust, respect and repentance, these things that your husband is yet to learn.

    Be strong. Let God be the new center of your world. He will never let you down!

    Kind Regards,
    Joyce

    By Post Author

    Dear Joyce,

    hello! 🙂 im jel, 22 yrs old and i feel like im trap in a place of nowhere. as im writing right now, i can feel the heaviness of everything. (all around me)

    here’s my story: i met a friend 2 yrs ago at work. and that’s the start of earthquakes of every day. I’ve found myself building strong friendship with him its like everything are so natural between the both of us. there’s no dull moments and we’re simply crazy.

    joyce, he’s the sweetest person I’ve ever met. He touched my soul. i feel loved yet hurtful. bitter sweet, because its complicated. he’s a gay and he’s in a relationship. but…. its hard to be here. in this situation.. he never failed to show that he care. deep inside i know that there’s unspoken love.

    i left that company because of him while he’s still there. thought, i could understand that im wrong to love him. but im here living in loneliness. joyce, he took care of me and I missed him. I recall the days….

    we share the same locker because he wants to. we try to make sure that we’re seatmates at the office and during our lunch. most of the time he make sure that im safe headed home. and there was a moment we have an outing. he said that he can’t make it. but all he wanted was me to please him. i knew it, because he said it after. he’s irresistible….

    things changes, i got transferred from him at work. but he doesn’t surrender our friendship. at that time i can see the sadness of his face. i remember him saying that im not motivated to work. he sent me a message that he will never resigned. she got me, im getting weaker every day and can’t stop the hurt and insecurity. because we’re detached to each other. although, he’s a gay, i know that most girls like her. i just feel insane over him.

    our connection would be the locker and emails at work. he never failed to be the sweetest. gave me stuffs and heart-felt messages… i kept wandering does he like me? oh my… joyce, i want to make this clear… you know this is just 1/4 of it. you might get bored and tired reading this? 🙂 i hope not, im desperate, i need HELP.

    also, he said that he will marry me and will go abroad where her sister works. but i said how about your partner? i’ll bring him along with us… he leaves me confuse again… he will try to be with me always. he loves to be with me.. most of the time, i can see him teary-eyed uttering words that “there’s no turning back”
    and “life was like a box of chocolates. You never know what you’re gonna get.” without realizing that fell in him regardless of who he is… but who am i? this won’t get deeper if he doesn’t let it…

    joyce, he was a decent type of guy. not the usual gays you can see every where. people who don’t know him never thought that he was a homo… (sighs) but the world today is changing and the choices of people…

    joyce, does this mean a start of a deeper purpose? why this had happened? to me? i am just a simple girl living in my comfort zone… and im not capable of understanding every thing. sometimes i can’t stop feeling hateful. i never wish for this…

    all i wish and pray now is to be honest with myself. i want to clear this out. i know where i stand, im not here to ruin every thing but i can’t stand the sorrow anymore. i need to act and let go. joyce, i have a plan of sending him a letter? i don’t know if can say it to him… but after this i know my place will get ligher.. joyce, i just need to voice out. (a peace of mind) is this wrong? i don’t know, it seems that no one can’t understand…

    joyce,

    thank you and god bless you more. may you touch and comfort more people who feel isolated…

    Dear Jing,

    Thank you for sharing your story with me. It’s really difficult to be away from someone we love. We do meet some people who become special to us and who make us happy.

    In this case, you met him.

    I think what’s important right now is how you could move on in life from there. Has he really learned to love you,too? If he has, I truly believe he should put your best interest at heart,and this includes an exclusive relationship just between the two of you. He should choose you over his partner,and not keep you around in uncertainty.

    This commitment will be a sign that he respects you,for there can be no real love without respect.

    Without this commitment and respect, there will be a lot of hurts, regrets and eventually, more wounds than happiness.

    Do pray about this as well. God is our best standard of what true love is. May He lead you to a blessed relationship!

    Yours In Prayer,
    Joyce

    By Post Author

    I am dealing with the most painful heartbreak I have ever dealt with to this day. He completely walked away from a relationship that lasted 5 years. We came to a bump in the road, and he walked. I involved him with my child and my family….and now he is gone. I loved him unconditionally…..I pray every day for healing and strength…..I just ask that I have a few more prayers in my corner….
    Thank you….

    Dear Callie,

    I pray for you now. I pray that you may find comfort and healing. I pray that in times when you’d feel most alone, you’d also feel God’s warm and loving embrace.

    Be strong. The pain may not easily go away,but in time, in God’s time, you’d find peace and new beginnings.

    God bless you and carry you through!

    Yours in Prayer,
    Joyce

    By Post Author

    Hi Joyce,

    I copied your prayer on letting go. Thank you for such a beautiful prayer.

    My heart is broken right now, but after praying that prayer, I felt much better. I know there will still be tough days when I will terribly miss the one I love but had to let go of. Please be one with me in praying that my heart and his heart will heal properly.

    Be my angel, please, and help me ask God to send friends along my way so that I will never have to be alone in this trying and lonely time.

    Thank you.

    Sincerely,

    Macel

    Dear Macel,

    I’m with you in prayers. I pray that God may comfort you in your loneliest moments, especially when you need a friend to understand and to lean on to. He will never let you down. He is the friend who will always listen to our hurts and never get tired of being there for us.

    I’ve once read in a chapel that God can certainly heal our broken hearts, but first, He must be able to have all the broken pieces. Do surrender every tear, every heartache to Him. In times when you don’t even know if your heart could still be healed, He might just give you a new one filled with His infinite and overflowing love!

    Yours In Prayer,
    Joyce

    By Post Author

    Hi Joyce, i like your site, very Christ-, relationship centered, and very inspirational, soul-uplifting.

    I pray for all your visitors in the web especially those who are going to some rough time, and GOD will always have the answer..we just have to listen some time when we pray..:) GOD BLESS..

    And will include you in my daily prayer, esp those who are in the healing process.

    Annie

    Dear Annie,

    Thank you very much in advance for your prayers! We really need them here. 😉 People are hurting and longing for Christ, the world has got to know how beautiful God’s love is. God bless you!

    Kind Regards,
    Joyce

    By Post Author

    Dear Dave,

    I don’t usually tackle religious questions such as yours due to this website’s focus of healing and not tackling philosophical and theological arguments that may hinder the true focus of this site. However, if helping you with these questions could satisfy a desire within you to find something that would comfort you or fill an empty part of your soul, I would help you in ways that I can. My belief is very simple, which is that we need God’s love in order to be truly happy. If you are already happy with your beliefs, then I see no need to tackle the above-mentioned questions. If you are not and you really desire to know the truth with the intention of being comforted and healed, I would pray for you that you may find what you truly seek. Do let me know what I can do for you.

    Kind Regards,
    Joyce

    By Post Author

    In April of 2011, My fiancé, the man I had been waiting for for 38 years, sent me a text to tell me the wedding was off. It was 8 hours before we were supposed to be married. When I tried calling him straight away, he would not answer the phone to me. I tried and tried and tried to do any and everything possible to get back with him for 7 months. He would come spend nights with me, cry with me, tell me he loved me and was still in love with me. Then he would leave the next morning and not speak to me for days. Now, we haven’t layed eyes on each other in 2 months. And I just found out a week ago that he’s seeing a woman that I know. my heart is breaking all over again. Because I realize now, that I’m not good enough for anyone. I finally take a chance with a man that is nothing of my type, and also a man that was my close friend for 4 years before we decided to start dating. I just knew he was my soulmate. And I know he DID love me. All I know is the nite before our wedding, alot of his friends got together with him and changed his mind about me. So needless to say, I am still heartbroken and I still deeply love him. And I fallen into the depths of despair. I don’t have a clue what to do with myself. I pray and pray and pray and it doesn’t seem to help.

    Dear Lisa,

    I’m really sorry to hear about what happened. People don’t deserve to be treated that way, we should be treated with respect and sincerity, and our emotions should be protected because it is very fragile. However, people are imperfect. Other people often don’t have the courage to say outright what they really mean to say. They also back away from the things they need to be doing as they coudn’t find the strength to do what’s right. Most of the time, we don’t even know the issues they are confronting on their own that makes them do such things.

    Lisa, even if people do such things to us, it doesn’t mean we deserve it or that we are not worthy of love. Hurt people hurt people. We are not the only ones confused, maybe they are too, otherwise, they would have done the right thing. It does’t mean that they should always carry this out as an excuse. But I wanted to mention it for our understanding, and so that we won’t feel so bad and blame ourselves for everything. Remember that it takes two people to make a relationship work. Even if you have done your best, if the other party could not, the relationship would still break apart.

    Also, even if all his friends would try to persuade him from marrying you, he shouldn’t be affected if he really loves you and wants to devote his life for you. He has his own mind, he is no longer a child that could easily be persuaded against his will.

    Right now, it’s alright to grieve for the relationship that has just ended. There is still much to understand and to heal. You have mixed emotions that could so easily overwhelm you if you try to face them all at once. Maybe what you could do now is to tackle them one by one, as your strength would allow it.

    Even if there seems to be no fruit from your prayers, I urge you to persist because it will have much fruit in due time. Wounds need time to heal, as we have devoted also much time to love.

    I will also pray for you. I will pray that you find comfort in God’s gentle love and in His strong caring arms. May He support you now in times when it is darkest and loneliest. Remember that you are not alone. God bless you!

    Yours In Prayer,
    Joyce

    By Post Author

    Thank you Joyce for responding. I know the best thing to do is let him go. He told me last week that he is over me. And he is so rude and short with me now if we happen to communicate. He has never a day in his life been rude to another soul. Only me, and it’s only been recently that he has started being mean to me. I am not totally clear on why, but it hurts. And I know I need to move on and leave him behind. Thank you!!

    Hello James, I’m sorry I do not have French tracts to send you. I will pray for you and for the girl you met. My advice is to keep things simple and to avoid complications. Remember the sanctity of marriage and the value of purity. Wait for the right time before you get involved with anyone. It will save you both from many headaches and frustrations. Continue to pray for the girl you met, but I suggest not to get involved with her until you have been healed yourself and have become strong enough to lead her to the right way of life. If there is a religious or a non-profit organization there that can help the young woman, do contact them because they may be in a better position to help her. Be blessed!

    By Post Author

    Hi Ms. Joyce

    I really need someone to talk to.. I can’t open up to my family about my problem. The past few months me and my husband where talking about things we need to discuss together..I asked him to find a job and i will help him coz nahihiya na ako sa mga mom in law ko who’s been supporting us for the past 4 years. I talked to him calmly.. But the last 2 weeks i never bothered him about it for i didn’t see any willingness to work, coz he wants daw to build a business which his parents can’t afford to give him a capital.Last Thursday we had a big fight, and to my surprise he suddenly slapped me in the face in front of many people..(which he never did to me..This is the first time that it happened) i was terrified i ran to our room and stayed there..After an hour i talked to my mom in law i told her i want to go home.(she knows about what happen)and she said No.. I told her ok, i will stay here but i will not share a room with your son.. Coz i don’t want to wake up every morning seeing his face, traumatized and afraid for my life, coz he threatened to kill me.. Until now 3 days had passed, we haven’t talk to each other, we live in two separate room.. Everytime i see him, it hurts me and i hate him so much that i can’t handle him anymore… Im always crying and i can’t take t anymore..

    Dear Ivory,

    Thank you for writing and for sharing your concerns. When it is our loved ones who hurt us, we suffer more because we expect them to be the ones to defend us and take care of us. We also feel so alone, because if the people whom we count on to cannot be there for us, who will? It’s natural to feel hurt and surprised, even to be afraid, because your husband did something that you never expected him to do.

    On the other hand, your husband may also be suffering in ways you are not fully aware of. The last four years may have affected his self confidence a lot and he may feel worthless as a person. He may just be as lost as you are, and he doesn’t know the next thing he should do. It is very hard to fail the person whom we loved most, and it must really hurt your husband to fail you and not to be able to provide for you. This does not mean however that what he did is excusable or justifiable. He has the responsibility to choose his actions. He must find a way to know what’s blocking him from making a difference in his life. Whether it is pride or ego of not accepting some kinds of jobs, he should be able to overcome it himself if he desires to be able to continue to love his family.

    There are things that your husband must need to acknowledge and to do for himself. There are some wounds which only he can uncover and allow to be healed.

    There are some things which you can do for him, but you can’t do everything. You can support him and cheer him on, but you can’t be responsible for his own life. What you can do is to be responsible for yours.

    Sometimes, we really need the space to allow this healing to take place. There are some wounds that are so deep in our hearts which only God can heal, and God can’t work on our healing for as long as we depend on others to do for us what only God can do.

    You also have your own wounds, and sad to say, your husband in not in his right condition right now to help you heal them. Could it be that you really need time and space away from each other so you could stop expecting what the other person couldn’t give the other for now? Could it be that you need this time so you could both think about the past and what you could do to change the future?

    If you feel that you really need this time to heal, I believe nobody should keep you from doing so, even your mother in law. Being together physically doesn’t mean that your relationship is also ok. Sometimes, distance helps us to miss the person, to know how we hurt them and to think of ways to grow so we can love them more and avoid causing them pain.

    During such a time, do know you’re never alone because God is with you and He will do for you what other people could never do. He knows you better and His love is strong enough to embrace you in your deepest hurts. God bless you!

    Yours In Prayer,
    Joyce

    By Post Author

    Ms.Joyce,

    With regards to my problem, after 1 week my husband took the step to reconcile with me. We talked and lay down the things we need to tackled. I decide that we undergo counseling but his not willing but i pushed him.. Now that we are on the same room again, why do i have this feeling that we don’t belong to each other anymore. I’m not comfortable everytime his touching me. I can’t feel any kilig factor that i used to feel. Every time he says i love u, it took me a long pause and just answer him ok. His apologizing almost everyday.. Is it normal that im not yet emotionally ready to accept his apology after what happen?

    Dear Ivory,

    I’m glad to know that your husband took that first step for reconciliation. But you may be right also that you’re not yet emotionally ready to treat things like the way they were before. Although our conscious minds can understand many things, emotions take some time to process. This is where we need some patience with ourselves and where our loved ones must extend their understanding.

    It is good when the two of you are willing to start again to work things out, but you must both be patient along the way. There are wounds that must be healed in time, and there are issues that need to be addressed one by one.

    Love may still be there, but it may be buried deeply by so many hurts and misunderstandings in the past. You need not force it yet, wait for it to blossom naturally. Respect your feelings and your need for time. Apology is only the first step, but the actual ‘restoration’ of a relationship may take much longer. Continue to pray for God’s guidance and let Him guide both your minds and your hearts. God bless!

    Yours In Prayer,
    Joyce

    By Post Author

    Dear Joyce,

    I don’t have a husband who physically abuses me
    but i have one who does so verbally and emotionally.
    He doesn’t care whether we be in public places like malls, offices etc
    he just feels he needs to, in his own terms, “vent out his spleen”.
    He had called me many things and often times says that i am stupid.
    He said i needed to reform, and that the only way was “his way”.
    for the past year i have been doing all he asks of me, i am not allowed to talk to my friends,
    neither am i allowed to go out of the house, he doesn’t lock me up, but he makes me feel emotionally burdened if and when i try to ask for his consent for me to go out.

    he calls me names, curses at me and yells at me almost everyday and despite that i serve him, and when night time falls he expects me to give him a massage and i do.

    i have never felt so low. I graduated from Law (he forbids me to take the bar exams) and i have studied these to be wrong but here i am so helpless. i keep telling myself that i am doing this all for my daughter.

    we have a daughter, she’s barely a year old. And i was advised by my parents to sacrifice for my daughter’s sake.

    but i feel that in the long run i would end up having a daughter who doesnt respect me for i have allowed myself to be treated this way.

    he doesnt care if my daughter is watching, he will vent out his spleen in her presence.
    after Christmas last year, he got drunk and wanted to fire his guns.
    i pleaded with him crying for the sake of my daughter. so instead he just threw things around the house and called me names.

    several times he had threatened to slap and hit me.
    he even said he’d kill my father and my family.

    I dont know how long i can still take being cursed at day after day.
    i dont know how much more i can take. I am shattered being “not good enough” for him.
    he makes me feel as if he is the one being patient with me.

    i know that i no longer want to be in this marriage.
    i barely recognize myself anymore. i used to be so strong and cheerful.
    but i am left helpless because i am scared that he might take my daughter away from me.

    i know my rights as a mother.
    but i know better that my husband doesnt respect such rights accorded by law.
    he told me so himself, that should i attempt for a separation he will get our daughter by force
    and will kill my family one by one.

    i dont know what to do.
    i have been praying night and day asking for strength
    i feel that along with prayers i also need to take action for myself
    and for my daughter but i am helpless

    Dear Tanya,

    You’ve been through something very difficult, and I can understand your reasons for having to sacrifice so much for your family. I believe you have truly hoped for change, a change that never happened all this time despite everything you have done.

    When things like that happens, we come to a point when we seriously think about what to do next in order to make a difference. What is it that we haven’t done yet? What new thing could we do that could bring in the desired results?

    Many times, we already have an idea of what it is, but we somehow feel afraid of doing it. But on the other hand, we just let things continue as they are, what are the real risks involved? Would things not only get worse each day? What should we really be afraid of?

    I truly believe you are a smart and intelligent woman. You wouldn’t even graduate from law if you weren’t. You don’t even need to pass the bar exams to prove that. Use the critical thinking skills you’ve learned, weigh things as they are, not according to what people say or to what our unstable emotions tell us. Believe in yourself once again. You have it in you to decide which way to go best for your children. I will pray for you and may God give you the wisdom and the strength to take the best path!

    Yours In Prayer,
    Joyce

    By Post Author

    Hi joyce, i feel that im at the lowest point of my life…late last year i found out that my bf ( for 6 months) is still going steady with her prior gf. i was crushed after learning that he fooled me for 6 months that we are together. but since i love him so much, i forgave him with his promise that he will end things with her and come back to me clean slate. but he did not come back at all. he said he was empty after breaking up with her (doubt if they really did break up), he said he needed some time alone coz he was confused. i gave what he wanted but finally ended up things with me saying that i should not wait for him anymore coz he’s not coming back. his reason was he wanted to teach me how to be patient and to wait but a day after our last conversation, i saw pictures of him with the girl. he never told me the truth about her until the end.he never faced me and he did say some rude things and treated me badly. i was so hurt, but trying to move on, no matter how difficult. please help me.

    Dear Faith,

    I hope you’re doing fine today. I’m sorry I wasn’t able to reply sooner. It must have hurt so much to break up from someone you cared so much about. But knowing that you have made it through since that time, I also know that you have it in you to survive this, and to come out of it with more strength and even more love to share.
    When we have already given everything, we have no regrets. Relationships take two people to make it work, and if the other person isn’t willing to work it out anymore, it’s no longer our fault. All we can do is to decide for ourselves to learn everything we can from this experience so that we will be more equipped the next time we do find someone who is willing to work out the relationship with us.

    Time does heal all wounds, though when we’re suffering, we feel we can’t even wait for that time. In your most painful moment, know that you are not alone, for God is with you, and He will carry you through in ways you could never imagine how. Hold on. Don’t give up. Don’t keep on looking back, for God has prepared a wonderful future for all those who will entrust their hopes in Him. Be blessed!

    Yours In Prayer,
    Joyce

    By Post Author

    hi joyce. my partner told me that he needs time for him to think things over. i know that its the end of our relationship. i have been in pain for the past 3 months until a week a ago when he told me through text message about this. he didnt even care to talk to me face to face.why am i in so much pain? i cant escape from the pain joyce.
    help me

    Dear Allan,

    The reason why you’re in so much pain right now may be because you have loved so deeply and gave your partner almost everything that is in you. The more we give of ourselves, the more we grieve when a relationships breaks apart because the more we feel we have lost a part of ourselves.

    I cannot say that the pain you feel will soon fade away, but what I know is that going through tough times like these naturally strengthens people, and the stronger we become, the more we are able to handle pain. You may not be aware of it, but you’re much stronger now than 3 months ago, and you will even be stronger in the days to come!

    So hold on and hang in there, Allan. All that you need to survive this is already within you. I believe in that!

    Kind Regards,
    Joyce

    By Post Author

    Dear Joyce,

    Hi! I have been an avid reader of your blog about a year an a half ago when I too have been experiencing heartbreak and burden in my life. Your words have really been a pat on my shoulder and a hug rolled in one. 🙂 I am now in a year long relationship and life has been treating me well. It is not a perfect relationship, we do have our shares of ups and downs but we come out of each as a better individual and we grow and learn together through those past mistakes.

    I just remembered you (and your blog!) which has been really a great help and i’m just sooooo glad to know that you still continue to help & inspire people. After that point in my life, I am a living testimony that truly indeed God will never leave you and there’s always that light at the end of the tunnel. After which you will become a much stronger and wiser person.

    Gratitude to you and continue to be a blessing!

    Thank you for your letter, Agnes! I really feel blessed as I read it. Im happy to know how God had been so good to you all this time. Always carry His love in your heart,and keep in touch. God bless you!

    Joyce

    By Post Author